Necessary Journeys
by merryhappy22
Summary: Naomi is coming home from a her first year of uni to surprise emz. I wish I could say only happy times here : Rubbish summary but give it a go, its my first fan fiction.  Emily/Naomi and some katie/effy.
1. Chapter 1

Jesus fuck it was cold. I really wished I'd brought a thicker coat, standing on the open station in a hoody might look cool but it wasn't clever.

I considered having a fag to warm me up but the thought of taking my hands out of my pockets was almost enough to make me quit smoking all together, almost.

Instead I let my mind wander to the beautiful redhead I knew was sleeping in my bed. Remembering every sound she makes in her sleep, how easy it was for me to reach out and touch her, to smell her and taste her. A smile crept across my lips as I recounted some of the hilariously mindless crap she mumbles in her sleep, and I felt my breath catch in my throat as I recall the times she's moaned my name whilst dreaming. God I needed to get home.

I swear if there are any higher powers they were totally on my side as my train pulls in. Only a short time and I'd be back and Bristol. I had almost finished my first year in Goldsmiths, Politics and English, my mother was sooo proud. Surprisingly so was her new shag, Kieran was awesome for her, and surprisingly I didn't hate him. I must be getting soppy in my old age.

Even though I've had a blast, partying and exploring the realm of further education this year has nearly killed me; being so far from Ems.

A weekend here, a day trip there, I could have easily dropped out at Christmas just so I didn't have to let her go again.

But now summer was upon us, a full five months of Emily Fitch. This thought alone had led me to a train at 1.32 AM. Mum and Kieran were coming to get me Saturday, But that was three days away and I knew all the lectures between now and then would be irrelevant bollocks. I could get home early and surprise her.

As it turns out lugging all my uni crap onto a train in the early hours, in the freezing cold was more of a challenge than I had expected, but eventually I was seated and grinning. Surprisingly the train wasn't empty; there were a couple of people dotted around my carriage. I wondered why anyone else could be so fucking mental to ride the train from London to Bristol at half one in the morning. I had a good reason, I had to kiss her, to tell her that I love her, to show her that I've missed her and that I'm sorry I've neglected her.

Fuck me I am getting fucking soppy.

"Tickets, tickets please" A fat bloke in a sweater vest squeezed himself down the isle, punching the ticket of a guy by the door.

I pulled my purse out, smiling at the photo of me and Ems at New Year I kept tucked in front of my ID.

This ticket had cost me a small fortune, serves me right for being impetuous and not planning ahead. But it would be well worth it.

Once the fat dude had moved on, I settled in my seat and pulled out my ipod.

Time passed slowly, too fucking slowly. The train pulled into Swindon Station.

I remember being here three weeks ago, it was a sort of half way point, me and Emily had spent a day and a night together before we had go to our separate ways, to separate Uni's, to separate lives, I was upset and I had lashed out, told her that she was being unfair going home, that I always made the effort to see her, that she didn't care if I lived or died down in London. She of course got pissed, she'd stopped taking my crap years ago, told me to grow up. Then she walked off and I didn't hear from her for four days when she decided to answer one of my three thousand calls.

"_hey" _

"_hey" I noticed I was whispering into my mobile, so did she._

"_I'm sorry"_

_I could hear her laughing, fuck was she laughing at me, Jesus I fucked up again._

" _I'm sorry too, I'm sorry I was such a child and ignored your calls." I could hear her smiling, I could see it in my head. And just like that we were ok again. "I miss you to, by the way." _

We went back to our normal routine after that, speaking everyday, texting constantly. She had no idea I was coming home early though. I was possibly the best plan I had ever hatched. I was grinning to myself again. The train pulled off, why the fuck I hadn't thought about getting a direct train I will never know.

When we finally reached Bristol I leapt up, arranging my shit, determined to make a more graceful exit than my earlier entrance. I was first off, the three other passengers apparently lacking in my energy and enthusiasm for Bristol.

Though to be fair Bristol was a shithole.

The wind hit me as I left the station, but the cold wasn't bothering me now, I was so close. It felt like Christmas morning, everywhere was still and silence, expectation laced the air, I felt nervous. I had a quick fag in the cold, and then another. I saw a cab pull in round the corner; I ran over and jumped in. The driver stowing my many bags in the boot. I might be a feminist but I'm not a bloody pack horse, let the large sweaty man carry my crap.

Before I knew it I was paying the man. I stood looking up at our house. Jesus if those walls could talk. These days it was much more Emily's than mine, she lived here seven days a week. She'd stayed close to home, studying English and drama at Bristol. But this blue doored building was still my home, the red headed girl was my home.

I silently slipped my key in the lock, placed my stuff in the hall, slipping off my shoes and noiselessly pushed the door shut. Doing all of this again grinning like a Cheshire cat. I was hit by a strong smell of weed, I really wanted to laugh, but swallowed it in favor of a stealthy entrance.

The house was surprisingly untidy, Emily was usually so fussy, always cleaning as she went. A small side effect with living with Katie I imagine.

I could see pizza boxes and other food packets scattered around the kitchen, I craned my neck into the living room, lots of bottles and cans. Cook was asleep on the sofa. Last night looked like it was messy.

I suddenly doubted myself; Emily might not be in the state or mood for anything I had planned when I made it up stairs. I could settle for a cuddle. I came here for her, not sex. But …

It was a little after three when I made it to our bedroom door. The landing was a mine field of clothes, most of them clearly Katie, unless my girlfriend had become a slapper in the last three weeks. And I was grinning again, swallowing giggles. I'd forgotten how much I missed this house. Last year had been so shit, but at this very moment I couldn't remember any of it. All I could see was red.

Katie had moved in with Ems when I left. Something that made me very happy, the idea of leaving her completely alone horrified me. Effy had moved in soon after. Once panda and Thomas left for America Effy had really needed Katie. Surprisingly Katie had risen to the occasion. Taking better care of Ef than I could have hoped. I had left for Goldsmith knowing all my girls were ok.

I pushed our door open. It smelt like Emily. Sweet and warm. She was snoring lightly on my side of the bed. Cocooned in pillows, wrapped up in one of my t-shirts. I couldn't help but stare at her hair. It was like seeing the sun after you'd been underground for too long. Red was spilling over the white pillows.

I let out a sigh before I realised I'd opened my mouth. I looked over but I hadn't woken her. Thankfully, I think if she looked up and saw me now she might have a heart attack, then the Fitch bitch next door would come and beat me to death with a shoe.

I was still stood by the door, one leg in and one leg out, seeing her had stalled me. I don't know how long I'd been there watching her. God I'm such a perve.

"God your such a perve" I literally shit a brick and whipped round to see a very amused Katie staring at me.

"Jesus Katie, what the fuck!" I threw a shoutty whisper to my second favorite twin.

"thirsty" she shook an empty glass at me as she headed to the bathroom " I'm glad your back, it will be nice to see her, you know, happier again." And she was gone.

I slipped the rest of me into our bedroom. I silently removed my jeans, socks and hoody. I moved round to her side of the bed in my pants and t-shirt. I lifted up the covers and tried to gracefully climb into bed without disturbing her. I couldn't help but bask, even in her pajamas she was gorgeous. I suddenly found myself struggling to breathe; she was literally breathtaking.

My stealthy entrance unfortunately had been noticed, she wriggled in her sleep as her eyelids fluttered open. She looked at the ceiling, then looked at me. He brown eyes capturing my blue ones. I suddenly forgot how to breathe altogether.

"Naoms?" My stomach tightened, she made my name sound sexy, fuck it she made everything sound sexy, the way her husky voice rolled over words. She could make me come reciting the dictionary.

She reached out and placed her hand on my neck, I let out a strangled breath, and gasped simultantiously. I didn't know how much I missed her until right now. Fuck that I knew exaltedly how much.

"I love you" I whispered as I lent in and kissed her. I didn't rush it, I savored it. Let my lips touch hers again and again. I slid closer to her, running one hand down her side and capturing her cheek with my other. She was soft and warm. She shuddered as I placed my hand on her lower back pulling her into me.

Suddenly we were too close. Her hands started a fire beneath my skin, our passionate loving kisses turned to passionate lustful kisses.

My tongue swept her lips and seconds later I was met with hers.

"fuck…Naoms" her breath came out in pants. My breath hitched in my throat and I could feel and ache growing between my legs. She swung her leg between mine, rolled me onto my back and topped me.

I let out another strangled moan as she brought her thigh up to meet my centre. I moved my hands up underneath her shirt, bringing it with me and pulling it over her head. She was nearly naked before me, and I've never wanted her more. It took all my strength not to fuck her. I wanted to love her and to show her how much I've missed her. With that thought in mind I sat up, our mouths never leaving each other, she brought her legs around me.

I moved my hand up her thigh, stopping millimeters from where I wanted to be. Her head flew back as she gasped my name, I took full advantage of this and brought my mouth to her neck, placing hot kisses over her collarbone.

I moved my tongue up her neck, licking and nibbling at her pulse point. She let out another quiet moan. I smiled in satisfaction. I carried on my ministration, making her release a series of small sounds, definitively Emily noises, that made my gasp. Her hands ran through my hair, they felt warm, they felt good, and they were incredibly distracting. I might have been the one driving but she was definitely in control.

I traced my tongue to her ear, nipping on her lobe.

" I'm gonna make you scream for me." I felt her shudder, I wrapped my arms around her holding her upright, holding her to me.

She smelt so good, like vanilla and honey.

Her hips bore down onto me, I could feel how wet she was. As I gasped and stopped my assault on her neck, drawing back slightly, she removed me top and pressed us together. I was suddenly very glad I'd chosen not to put a bra on today.

As our bodies fused together, her breasts pushed against mine for the first time in what seems an eternity, I place my forehead again her, locking her gaze. Catching my breath, trying to steady her.

I lifted her off the bed, turning us round and pushing into her, feeling her beneath me made me want to loose control again.

I brought my mouth back to hers, I kissed her with as much passion as I could place on my lips. I dragged my underwear off, and hooked my fingers over her waistband. She gasped into my open mouth and I swallowed it gratefully.

As I slide her underwear down, making a much more laborious effort of it than I had my own, I kissed every inch of her, settling over her right breast. I kissed and licked the underside, hot breaths landing of her nipple as a hovered over her.

"Naomi…fuck…please" God I lived to make her this horny. I took her tit into my mouth, sucking on her nipple, rolling my tongue over it, biting down gently. She'd wrapped her legs around my bare waist, bringing her hips up to meet mine, grinding her core into me, and threatening to undo me completely. She was so wet. I stopped hovering, and let my body fall on her, crushing her down into the mattress, restricting her movements.

I continued my efforts, moving to her other breast, showing it as much attention as the last.

The noises the desperate redhead was releasing were unraveling me; I could have cum right there. I couldn't tease her much longer, I didn't have the strength.

Making a small space between our warm bodies I slid my hand down her body, down the valley between her perfect tits, over her toned stomach, straight to where she needed me.

She screamed my name, arching he body to me. I pushed my finger through her swollen cunt. She screamed again as I pushed two strong fingers inside of her.

I began pushing my fingers rhythmical, allowing her body to move with me, I retuned my mouth to her breasts.

"Fuck, Jesus, Fuck, Christ" Her hand were in her hair, I knew she was close; I could feel her tighten around my fingers. Part of me wanted to draw this out tease her, but a bigger more selfish part wanted to feel her come.

I moved back up attacking her mouth with my tongue. We rocked together.

Our eyes burning into each other. I curled my fingers within her; I slammed my palm into her clit, circling it with my thumb. I could feel her tighten around me. Soon she was out of control, her body thrashing. She was screaming my name and gasping. Nothing in life can ever feel as good as bring Emily to an orgasm like that. I held my fingers in her until she stopped shuddering.

"I love you" I placed a gentle kiss on her forehead " I missed you" another gentle kiss, I slowly kissed her swollen lips. Caressed them with my own. Still lying on top of her. Letting her body calm down.

"you're amazing, I'm so in love with you." she sighed. I rolled to the side, instantly missing her warmth.

She cuddled into my side and I happily held her. Her breathing began to settle and I soon recognized the sounds of her falling asleep.

The dream of tonight, well this morning hadn't even come close to the reality. The reality was so much better. I crashed into peaceful sleep, dreaming nothing but red.


	2. Chapter 2

Authors Note: Hey, Thanks for the nice reviews. I've been thinking about this story for a while, got an idea of where I'd like it to go.

Hope you enjoy reading it as much as I'm enjoying writing it.

Disclaimer: I don't own skins

Chapter 2 – Welcome home.

A very irritating buzzing woke me up from my sleep. It took a short while for my sleep addled brain to connect the dots between the odd noise and the mobile phone jumping its way across the bedside table.

"Hello" I groaned, I could here my mother; Giving me a lecture.

"yes; I know your meant to be partying allot, but for fuck sake Naomi its half one, get out of bloody bed!"

With an attitude like that I was suddenly worried about telling her I'd skipped a weeks worth of lectures for sex, well not just for sex. She'd never been the kind of mum to bother about the mundane running of my life, but I'd never been the kind of daughter who needed it.

"Hey mum, Missing you too yeah," Apparently my prime selection of wit and sarcasm had abandoned me.

I looked over and saw that my gorgeous redhead wasn't in bed with me. I stretched out my hand, the bed was cold, she'd been gone a while.

Mum continued on, I don't have a clue what she was saying.

Emily had left me a note.

_Morning Naoms,_

_Had a lecture, sorry couldn't skip it. I'll be back for 3ish._

_Don't be mad I didn't wake you before I left, you looked like you were having a good dream ;) _

_Love you always_

_Emz_

I tried not to feel disappointed, I mean I only skipped a whole week of lectures for her. No Naomi don't do the jealous bit. She'll be back soon and probably more than happy to see you.

I was sprung back into the present by my mother screaming my name, oops.

"Jesus Christ, what?"

"ahh right, anyway, the reason I'm calling you is to check what time we're picking you up Saturday?"

Shit.

"erm, well to be honest mum, you don't need to worry about coming to get me."

"don't be silly love, we're more than happy to, I forced Keiran to buy a normal car, so we might make it back without the RAC this time."

"Really? Domesticating that one are we, you'll be making him brush his hair next." I couldn't not laugh. A few years ago the idea of my mum having a quasi normal boyfriend, Me being in love (with a girl no less) and everything being pretty much perfect would have been enough for me to seek a medical professional. "Anyway, what I mean is, I'm home already. I took the train last night, Our lecturers said that there was no real point us staying so I thought I'd come home on my own." White lies, which she swallowed happily.

"Aww love, fantastic, you should have called we would have come down, you have so much shit." A laughed at the loving tone my mother easily attached to her profanity.

"yeah, it was a bit of a struggle, but I managed, plus I got to surprise Emily."

"Right well I'm sure you want to settle in, but could we have dinner tomorrow night? Keiran won't shut up about your course content. I swear the crap that man gets excited about."

"yeah tomorrow sounds great, you wanna come here?"

"definitely, right, get your lazy ass out of bed, see you love, oh give my love to Emily."

I was alone again. Still disappointed. My tummy rumble made my decision for me. I climbed into an old pair of joggers and a t-shirt and left our cozy room.

As I reached the top of the stairs the front door opened. I very over eagerly ran down, assuming Emz had come home early. But instead of my fuckable yet out so adorable girlfriend I was hit but the very much larger and strongly smelling James Cook.

He was wearing a hi-vis vest and had a fag hanging out of his mouth.

A very cook smile grew over his face, and it took seconds before he pulled me into a hug.

"Naomikins, where the fuck have you been?"

"Narnia"

"You've been missed my lezza buddy."

"Don't take this the wrong way Cook, but You fucking reek"

"Yeah, I'll nip in the shower then Fag?"

"Sure."

He bounded off upstairs. I surveyed my house, still in a state from last night.

I walked into the kitchen and flipped the kettle on, grabbed a bin bag and started throwing crap away.

Not that the mess really bothered me, but it would Em.

By the time Cook reappeared most of the bottles had been located in the recycling and other rubbish tossed. It wasn't clean but it would do for now.

I made us a couple of coffees and a cheese sandwich.

The garden had changed a bit since Christmas. New flowers had been planted, it was June so they were blooming, it looked really nice. Plus there was now a brick shed that ran along the back wall.

"Garden looks amazing" Lit up a fag and passed it to me, before lighting his own.

"yeah our Emz is quite green fingered." I could see the cogs in his mind tick over, trying to make it dirtier.

"Wow, Impressed."

We sat on the patio for a while, just catching up. He told me about his job as a delivery driver. He had to start early in the mornings but he was usually done by lunch, and He had all weekend off. It seemed to suit him.

It was really comforting, he'd come along way in a year.

The night I had sorted my shit out and finally made up with Emily, Cook discovered what happened to Freddie, Following Foster and confronting him. The two of them beat the shit out of each other, Cook came out on top, and he beat Foster to within an inch of his pathetic little life.

After the sick Therapist left a letter with Freddie's Family, they called the authorities. The police found them both unconscious in Fosters House. They found Freddie to.

All the evidence pointed to cook being the victim, which is not a word often connected to the legendary James Cook, Foster's injuries attributed to self-defense. He went back to prison with a little extra tagged onto his sentence for the jail break but fortunately that was it. Spending most of his time in the prison hospital ward, recuperating, mending bone and fading bruises. Cook spent a good two weeks dipping in and out of consciousness, for a minute we weren't convinced he would even survive. But if anyone could, it would be Cook. He missed Freddie's funeral.

I Heard the front door shut. Fuck _3ish._

I excused myself. I could hear Cook Sniggering.

By the time I'd got to the hall she'd already jumped up the stairs, I looked up at her and cleared my throat. She came jumping straight back down, she was bouncy, she made me feel bouncy. Contagious excitement.

As she hit the bottom step she leapt at me. I of course in my strong and oh so stable manner caught her.

She wrapped her legs around my waist. She was so beautiful. She was wearing dark shorts and a white vest, damn she looked good.

She was smiling as she kissed me, I could feel the curve of her lips, and she made me smile. Contagious smiling.

I pushed her into the wall by the stairs, as I felt her hands run over my shoulders and around my neck, pulling me closer. She made my legs shake, and I really didn't want to drop her.

"For fuck sake we're right here!" Nothing could compare to the shrill voice of Katie Fitch. Katie's Voice is the sound equivalent of a cold shower. I took another second to compose myself, pulling away from a reluctant Emily.

"Fucking Lezza's been home five minutes and she's already molesting my sister." Katie muttered as he padded into the kitchen, Leaving Effy to smirk silently by the door.

"Back then?"

"Yup"

"Good"

And that was it. She followed Katie into the kitchen. Thankfully this left me and Emz alone in the hall.

I pulled her over into my arms. I held her there for a good minute. Allowing her to fit against me, it felt like we'd been apart for to long and she'd lost her groove. She didn't take long, she looked up at me and smiled.

"Hey"

"Hey"

"you are amazing, you know that?" Her arms settled around my neck, Mine found her waist, it took allot of effort on my part to keep them there.

"Amazing huh,"

"Thank you for last night, when I woke up I'd almost convinced myself I'd been dreaming."

"dreaming, dream about that allot do you?" I smirked. I lend over, nuzzling my face into her neck, kissing it lightly. I felt her melt a little more against me.

"you have no idea." Apparently smirking is also contagious.

"Fuck sake!" Katie bellowed from the kitchen door. I wouldn't say she was glaring at me, but it was more a semi friendly / semi aggressive stare. "I made a tea,"

Emily gave me a lingering kiss on the cheek and slid her hand into mine as be sauntered into our kitchen, which was now full of people.

I gave Eff a quick hug, I'd missed her allot. She smiled at me, but it wasn't quite real. But it was more genuine than the last one she gave me, at Christmas when I said goodbye. She was getting there, a little better everyday.

Freddie's death had murdered her, He took her life with him. At first she just stopped. Eating. Drinking. Sleeping. talking. She was just a body, my friend had vacated, between her and Cook the rest of us had to pull it together.

But slowly she was waking up, over a year later and she was close to being whole again.

The five of us Cook, Effy, Katie And I sat in the kitchen talking for a while. Katie and Cook deciding my return was a moment to celebrate, therefore we had to party. I tried to look enthusiastic at the prospect of spending the night drunk with my friends, but in reality I would rather take my red head upstairs, fuck her till the sun came up and party tomorrow. Emily took that moment to run her hand from my knee to the top of my thigh, making me draw in a breath, it didn't go unnoticed, Katie rolled her eyes at me.

Effy and Katie left a little time after that, doing a beer and vodka run. Cook went to get some less than legal party supplies. Emily Promised that she would send the invite out, letting everyone know.

The house was quiet again, the moment the door clicked shut I'd pushed Emily against it. Uncontrollably running my hands over her. My lips crashed against hers with more strength than I thought I had. As my tongue entered her mouth I felt her stiffen, I pulled back a little. I must have looked concerned.

"it's ok, two minutes, k?"

She slid around me, grabbing her bag from where she'd dropped it earlier, and started up the stairs, before she was half way she turned and held out her hand. I didn't need telling twice.

I dropped onto our bed. I propped myself up on my elbows, and ran my eyes over her. She pulled out her laptop, Perching at the edge of our bed, the computer sprang to life.

"Em, Work later, Play now." I pouted.

"I'll be two minutes."

"Pfft" She swung her head round at that noise, lent down and pulled me into a deep kiss that made my stomach quiver.

She pulled back and returned to the screen, I couldn't be irritated after that.

I sat up and slid behind her, so she lent into my chest. A familiar Facebook page opened up as a looked over her shoulder, I was drawn instantly to the picture of us at new year, the same photo that's in my wallet.

I wrapped my arms round her middle and pushed my cheek across her neck and up into her hair. I breathed in her hair. It smelt like nothing else.

I continued to mold myself around, holding her tight to me.

She hadn't moved, she hadn't done anything, other than move against me.

"sorry" I backed of a little but not allot. She bit her bottom lip and smiled.

She began typing, setting her status to

_Naomi's home! Party at ours, come o__r Katie will hurt you._

After that it took seconds for her to close the laptop and push me down on to the bed. Straddling me. As much as I love winding her up, I love it even more when she takes control. The reserved twin transforming in to my Emily, The one only I get to see. The one who loves to top me and tease me.

A short while later, Emily and I were wrapped up in each other, pushed impossibly close, limbs entwined.

We were kissing; it was soft and deep, passionate but not lustful. The last hour had taken it out of me, but I didn't want to sleep, I wanted her.

The front door slammed, I mean really slammed, like someone was angry at it. Katie subtly announcing her return.


	3. Chapter 3

Hello. :P Thanks for the nice reviews. Hope this chapter is ok. I no I promised only happy here but that only really works in a one shot, lol.

Thanks again. I'd love to know what you think.

Oh and sorry for any spelling issues, my computer is stuck on American, It doesn't accept English easily!

Laura xxx

The House Was Thumping.

The house was thumping. A few hours had passed since Katie had abruptly woken us from our post coital nap. Now a shit load of strangers were pushed into every available corner of my previously calm home. I was half a litre of vodka heavier and had happily swallowed a couple of E's Cook had passed along. The hardcore partying at uni hadn't been as hardcore as home, so currently I felt fucked.

I'd lost Emily in the crowd a while ago, I bounced from wall to wall trying to spot my redhead.

When I eventually found her she was chatting to a small group in the kitchen. I squeezed myself next to her, taking a large swig from my now nearly empty bottle.

"Found you."

"That you did, here I want you to meet some people." She was smiling at me, I smiled back, but I was pretty sure it came off as drunken grinning. She chuckled and slid her arm around me, talking some of my weight off jellied legs.

"Naoms, this is Derek, Tom, Danny and Amy, They're on my course."

"So the famous Naomi, we've heard allot about you." The brown haired boy, Derek I think, raised his hand and shook mine firmly. He's eyes were glassed over, thank fuck I wasn't the only wankered. Actually all three lads looked wreaked.

"You'll have to excuse them, Naomi, these pussy's aren't quiet used to uncle Keith special blend." The brown haired girl spoke up for the first time.

She was hot, not Emily hot. I instantly disliked her, she reminded me on Mandy. Her wavy hair snaked over her shoulders, falling over her chest, which was barely covered by a thin white strapless top.

I suddenly found myself wondering how she'd gotten so used to uncle Keith's special blend. How many nights had she spent at the pub with my girl.

My worries were soon washed away, Emily kissing me lightly but longingly on my cheek. I realised I'd been silent too long, as I sized up this new girl. But while Emily was staring at me, I continued to stare at Amy, watching as her eyes flicked between Emily's face, our entwined bodies and my eyes. Which through no fault of my own were boring very angry holes into this woman. She looked irritated. Good.

It was very clear that Amy did not like my reappearance.

"yeah, I don't think I'm fairing too well, its been a while." I slurred "Can we get some air Emzy?" She nodded at me and we staggered toward the backdoor.

The air hit me like a wave. It wasn't cold but it was so new after the stuffy sweaty house that I shivered uncontrollably.

Emily wrapped her arms around me and pushed me against the house wall.

Party out of lust and partly out of necessity, my jelly legs becoming quite a problem.

The random others smoking and chatting back here gradually retreated into the house and we were left alone.

She pushed her tongue into my mouth, she tasted of alcohol and something very Emily. It was hot, it poured a heat into me that instantaneously traveled the length of my body. I dropped my now empty vodka bottle, I heard it smash, I didn't care but Emily broke away to look down at it.

Her face was inches from mine, as much as I wanted to kiss her, to feel myself fall into her (probably quite literally at some point soon) I couldn't tear my eyes of her. Her eyes were stoking the fire that burned within me.

"Emz, I've been thinking…"

"Did it hurt?" A very cute grin erupted over her face.

"Hardy Ha, but seriously, I don't want this to end."

She wasn't smiling anymore, she looked a little like I'd slapped her, I mentally replayed the last few moments, making sure I hadn't, fucking drugs.

"What?" She whispered when I hadn't said anything, I felt her move away, she was dragging my fire away with her. I pulled her back.

"no, Em, I just, I just got home and I can't stand the idea of taking my stuff and being away again." Again fucking drugs, I wasn't even sure I was speaking English.

She opened her mouth repeatedly, but nothing came out, eventually she sighed and gave up.

"I'm thinking I'm not going back."

She let go, she moved a full foot away. Now I was the one sporting the look of shock. But it wasn't half as expressive as the look of confusion that had struck Emily. She didn't want me here.

"Naoms, You can't stay, You love your course, You can't quit and also for the record you can't get drunk and say stuff like this to me, its not fair. You have to mean it."

"I do mean it. I don't want to quit my course; I could find a compromise so I can have both."

"so what you'll commute, the train fair to London would be ridiculous, or we'd move there, again train fair for me, plus leaving Kay." She was rambling; I really shouldn't have done this tonight. "Its not feasible Nai, You knew that when you chose to go there, you knew I wouldn't leave Bristol, you chose to leave." Guilt. I didn't leave her. "Its not like I can move to Goldsmiths and the politics courses here are shite."

I blame the stupid fucking drugs for my next move.

"I didn't fucking leave you, I made my decision It was the wrong one, I miss you too fucking much, but clearly it was one way, clearly your having the time of your fucking life without me. Probably can't wait till I trot off back to London, and you can get back …"

"fuck you Naomi, Grow up." She didn't sound angry, just hurt. Great I'd been back less than twenty four hours and I'd made her cry.

She stormed off back into the house, disappearing through the masses. Probably to cry on the shoulder of the first friend she found. I stood their silently praying it was anyone but Amy.

I sauntered off down the garden. I should sober up a bit, then find her and make it right. I think I lost my footing somewhere, the next thing I felt was concrete beneath me, it was cold but I couldn't stop myself from falling asleep.

I woke up someplace new. I felt my chest tighten in panic. I vaguely remember the house and the garden. Neither of which matched the description of the room I was currently occupying.

"Naomi?" a small whisper to my right, Emily? I suddenly relaxed.

I slowly took in my surroundings, my body started to wake up, I felt in pain.

My head was burning, No normal hangover, that's for sure. Fucking drugs.

I felt awful. "Fucking hell, I'm never drinking again." I tried to sit up, but Emily forced me back down, and not in a sexual way.

I suddenly realised I was in a hospital room. It was dark, still night time, but it must have been very late, or early depending on your perspective.

I looked over at Emily, illuminated by a lamp beside me. She looked awful, her make up all run, eyes puffy, she'd been crying. Also there was blood on her shirt. Putting two and two together, I assumed it was mine. Why did I have to be such a tosser.

"Naomi lie still kay." Terrible thing to think but all the crying had made Emily's normally very sexy voice pretty irresistible. If it hadn't been for the burning across my forehead I would have fucked her right there.

Emily ran out and grabbed a medical person, presumable a nurse. The nurse told me to rest and that a doctor would be in to assess me shortly.

"Emz what happened." She sat down beside my bed, picked my hand up and kissed it. I might have been a little harsh earlier, when I said she looked awful, I mean I wasn't wrong, she did look tired and stressed, but she also looked incredibly beautiful.

"don't worry about it right now baby, just rest, I'll explain everything soon." She started to stroke my hair, and her hand soothed the fire in my skull. I found myself falling into her brown eyes, and like as I was lying in the garden; I couldn't stay awake.

A little while later I woke up. Emily still stroking my hair, she hadn't moved. But the sun had risen. The light made her hair glow, I marveled at the crimson strands for a second.

"morning."

"morning Em."

She lent down and kissed me, she pushed our lips together; it was deep but not intense. I let a smile creep over me.

She pulled away as a doctor and nurse entered my room. There shoes slapping against the floor tiles, making my head scream again.

"Good Morning Miss Campbell." Tosser "How are you feeling?"

"Fine, Bit of a head ache." I glanced up at Emily who was worrying. Chewing on her lip and taking very shallow breaths.

"Any nausea?"

"A little, nothing serious though." Purely for Emily's benefit, I'd been considering throwing up right until the point she kissed me.

"that's normal. Looking at your test results you have a concussion, light nausea is to be expected, as is a headache. I'm going to prescribe you some pain killers and discharge you. Nurse Carter here will talk you through issues for when you leave." And he was gone. His bedside manner could use a serious evaluation. Just brand me with a number and whack me on a conveyer belt. Although as I have a concussion I can assume I hit my head. At this point I figured I'd just nod and smile till Emily could explain to me.

The nurse proceeded to lecture me on the perils of alcohol abuse and binge drinking, handing me a bag full of patronizing leaflets and condoms. Great, I'm sure we could find a good home for those with Cook.

At this point my mother swung into the room. She almost looked amused. Not the appropriate response when your only daughter was lying in a hospital bed.

"Hello."

"Ah, Mrs Campbell?" The nurse smiled, apparently glad to know an adult was coming to claim me.

"Yes, Gina Campbell." Like the nurse gave a crap about her name. I had to smile at her.

"Good, I should go through some possible issues Naomi may have at home."

"Then you'd be best talking to Emily dear, she lives with her."

The nurses face fell, not that I'd done anything to convince her young people can be responsible.

The nurse took Emily to one side; Mum gave me a massive hug.

"Either you're a cruel cow, who likes to put your girlfriend continually through hell, or you're an ejjit."

"ejjit? Mum you've been spending too much time with Keiran."

I chose to ignore mum as I had yet to remember what idiotic act had landed me in hospital.

I could hear the nurse and Emily talking. The nurse spewing phrases like 'behavioral changes' and 'loss of appetite'. Emily was told that if I began to show any odd symptoms at all I was to be brought straight back to hospital. By the time the woman had finished I could have slapped her. Apart from my fucking headache I felt fine. She'd scared the shit out of my delicate girlfriend whose eyes had started to fill up, again.

Mum signed my discharge forms as I got dressed. I hated having to put my party clothes back on. I would kill for my jeans right now.

Emily took her hoody off and handed it to me.

"No, you'll get cold."

"Its fine we're just walking to the car. Then you won't have to put this back on." She scrunched up my top, putting it in a plastic bag. I realised it must have blood on it; she tried to hide it from me.

I slid on her hoody, it smelt amazing and was warm, and it was suddenly my favorite thing.

We left the ward, walked down to a waiting room, where I could see a very tired Cook, Effy and Katie, whom all jumped up as we approached. Fuck, I am such an asshole.


	4. Chapter 4

Hello, I know two updates in one day!

I didn't have much to do. Plus I'm going away for a few days to get sum space from some crap going on a home. So I won't be able to update till next Wednesday. Sorry. Bit smutty this chapter :P Hope you like it, Let me no.

The nice thing people have said have really motivated me to write. If I can I'll update something while I'm away.

Anyway…. Thanks again.

Laura xxx

The people that need us.

The car ride home was spent mostly in silence, all of us crammed in Keirans new not to shitty car. I sat up front with mum; I could feel four sets of eyes locked onto me. I was going to have many apologies to make when we got home.

The few minutes I had spent with everyone gave me an incite. Katie was immensely pissed off; I could assume one for ruining the party, two for causing Emily pain, three for causing Effy pain.

Eff had regressed a little, she was silent and withdrawn, and after everything with Freddie she didn't need this. Cook didn't seem to give a monkeys, but was watching me watch the other girls with great amusement.

Emily was just staring at me, like she was ticking off the nurse's checklist.

When we pilled out of the car, mum gave me a hug and said she trusted Emily to take care of me and she had to go to work, but she did warn me to take better care of myself, for Emily's sake. I swear she loved Em more than me some days, not that I could blame her.

We agreed to rain check our dinner plans for tonight. Which was awesome as I had forgot to tell Emz anyway.

Just before we got in Katie turned to me, gave Emily a look. She let go of my hand. Never a good sign. Especially as I was going into a Fitchbitch lecture with no forewarning or protection.

"Look, I'm really glad your ok, but your meant to make her happy, not fucking cry, I've never seen her like that, do it to her again and I will fucking kill you. Oh and look at Effy…feel guilt and feel shame. I'm letting this go cuz Emz doesn't need me to be a bitch right now and I've got my hands full trying to convince Eff we're not all going to die and leave her." She had barely taken a breath, this had been brewing all night, I couldn't disagree with her on any point.

"I'm sorry Katie, Really I am." She seemed to accept that, she even hugged me, it was weird.

Em was waiting by the door. I asked her for a minute. She nodded and let me past. I could see Cook spooning coffee into mugs; I slid into the living room. Effy was sat hunched on the sofa.

"Sorry, I know I'm being stupid." She was crying. In hind sight I should have stayed at uni, waited for mum, not come home, this shouldn't have happened, the girls I'd left happy and safe were crying.

I pulled Effy into a hug and we stayed like that till Cook brought coffee.

Yay for coffee, Fucking concussion and a hangover.

"I love you, I'm sorry I was a twat." I tried to make her look at me.

"its fine you just looked…. And I panicked." She sighed, her blue eyes met mine, and she cracked an almost smile. "Just no more solo walks before you found your drug legs again, k?"

"K," I kissed her forehead and gave her a hug.

Right two down, one to go, the important one. She however wasn't sat in the living room, she was leaning against the door frame. She nodded towards the stairs.

We sat sipping coffee. In silence.

"I'm sorry."

She laughed. "You don't even remember what your apologizing for."

"I doesn't mean I'm not sorry.

"Don't, don't be sorry." She looked sad again. "I'm sorry." What the fuck was she apologizing for?

She sat in front of me cross legged. "I shouldn't have walked off; I acted like a child _again_."

"Babe, I was a tit, I said awful things, you had every right to storm off."

"Nai, you were trashed, you could barely stand and I left you. I didn't go looking for you for an hour. I found you outside unconscious in a pool of blood. You were freezing. I screamed. Katie came and called an ambulance. I froze, I though you were dead, that I'd lost you." The tears were streaming down her cheeks. I pulled her over my lap; she instinctively wrapped her arms and legs around me. I let her tears soak through my hoody., well her hoody.

"shhh, baby, please stop crying."

"It's was my fault, I'm so sorry."

"Its not your fault, it was a stupid drug induced accident. What the hell had a done to myself anyway?" She looked up at me, the sobbing subsided, the corners of her mouth twitched, she was considering smiling.

"You tripped over a pot and fell backwards into the shed wall." My eyes widened, how could my beautiful redhead feel guilt over my clumsy feet.

"you have five stitches in the back of your head."

"I'm sorry Nai, I promise to never leave you ever again."

"Emz please, It was just an accident, I'm fine, we're here together. Ok?"

She nodded. We shuffled around on the bed. And before long I'd fallen asleep. I'd only been awake for a couple of hours, fucking head injury.

I woke up later to whispers. Emily was whispering to Katie concerning diner. Fuck me it was dark outside. I'd slept all day. Great way to easy my girlfriends worry.

She must have noticed I began to wake up as she shooed Katie out of the room and helped me sit up. I did feel incredibly dizzy and my head was screaming. She passed me a couple of pills and a glass of water. I was incredibly grateful, I just hoped they kicked in soon; I didn't want to look hurt or sick. It went against the Naomi Campbell grain and made Emily look like someone had shot her puppy.

"Did I hear food." I croaked, Jesus, I even sounded sick.

"yes, but only if you want it, I can get kay to bring it up."

"nah, let go down, I don't think she'd appreciate waiting on me and I wouldn't mind some fresh air."

"do you mean a fag?" She was smiling, it was like seeing the sun.

"maybe, do you mind?"

Emily returned to our bed, shaking her head. I looked over to her side and was stunned by the bright white light cast by her laptop. It took a moment for my eyes to adjust. But I realised it was sat on a train website; she was looking at season ticket prices.

"going somewhere babe?" I tried not to sound too concerned.

"no, its just research, If your serious about staying, we need to be sensible." I was shocked, I hadn't even though of our fight since I woke up in hospital. She clearly had. "I don't want you to think that I don't want you to stay, I would love that. But I'm not going to get excited just to have my heart ripped out when I drop you at uni in September. Are you serious about finding a way for us to stay together next year?"

"yes, Its what I want."

"right, well you buying a car, and then parking in London will bankrupt us, moving to an in-between place works financially but I can't be that far from Katie, I hope you understand."

"Of course, I'd never ask you to."

"I know, well my last sensible option is you taking the train. With a rail card the ticket is still ridiculously expensive, but doable. You'll need to get a summer job mind you, and its allot of traveling, means long days" I was in awe of her. Give the girl a day and she could probably cure world hunger.

"I'd walk the distance over broken glass if I had to." A touch dramatic, maybe but my Emz did like her romantic gestures.

She put the laptop down, I pulled her on top of me, I had to kiss her, I know I shouldn't get excited yet, but she wanted me to stay and we could make it work.

I was trying to keep my head off the pillow as the weight of my own skull made my healing wound throb. But as our kisses deepened Emily's hand ran up my side and settling on my breast I couldn't stop my head for flying back, colliding with the soft surface. I gasped in pain and Emily recoiled as if I'd shot her. I tried to recover the situation but Emily was already crawling off the bed.

"Come on, Katie will do her nut in if we let tea go cold."

I slipped into a clean tee and some loose jeans, but I put Emily's hoody back on. It still smelt too good to take off.

As it turned out dinner was still being cooked, I silently cursed myself for letting Emily out of bed.

I walked through the kitchen and straight out the backdoor. Emily started helping Katie with dinner. Pasta by the looks of it.

Effy and cook we're smoking out here. Which was great as I needed to bum a smoke. I took up the free deckchair next to Cook.

"And she rises, how you diddling naomikins?" He roared, I tried not to wince, my head was still fucking killing me. Fucking cheap NHS, could that not buy pain killers that actually worked.

"fine, fag please." Effy passed me one and Cook chucked me a lighter.

We sat in a comfortable silence. I could hear Katie yelling from the kitchen. "Such a control freak that one." Emily came stomping out moment's later.

"she can be a right un appreciating bitch sometimes." Emily sighed, grabbing the fag in my mouth before taking a long drag and slipping it back between my lips.

"you not met Katie before Em?" Effy smirked. Her back leaning against the wall Em had pushed me against less than 24hrs ago. Emily sat down on my lap, taking the fag out of my mouth I lent up to rest my chin on her shoulder.

Everything had slipped back in to normality after my hospital incident. I sat thinking of the scene I must have caused last night.

Emily Screaming and crying, an ambulance had been called, how fucking embarrassing, me being carried through the dregs of a party and carted off.

Katie finally called us all in for tea. Spaghetti Bolognese, Emily's favorite. It was amazing the ways that girl could show she cared. One minute telling Em to fuck off and stop being such an interfering bitch, the next serving her up her favorite tea, I of course was last to receive my plate, Katie clearly not letting me off lightly.

Although to be fair my earlier hunger had dissipated, I made it through half my plate before I had to give up.

I wasn't long after that Emz dragged me back to bed. Insisting I needed rest.

I got ready for bed; basically I took my clothes off. She grabbed herself one of my t-shirts. We climbed in; she slid her leg over my thigh. Continually slapping my hand away, as it returned time and time again to the soft skin on her thigh.

The pills she'd given me earlier had definitely taken effect, I take back everything I previously said about the NHS, I felt completely normal, no pain, the only dizziness being a direct result of having my gorgeous girlfriend pushing nearly naked against me.

"I'm not going to fuck you." She smirked at me. Trying to sound serious.

"I never asked you to fuck _me._"

I pushed my hand a little further up her thigh, her breathing changed, she tried to hide it. But I could get my degree in Emily, I knew every little noise.

"so just so I'm clear, you don't want me kiss you. Run my hands through your hair?"

Another little noise.

I pushed myself on top of her, took the hand at her thigh and ran it the length of her body, up her neck and in to her mesmerising red hair. I lowered my lips to hers. Everything every quickly descended from sensual teasing into lustful touching.

Her hips bore down onto my leg which was pressed into her centre; I could feel her getting hotter. My lips met her neck as I began to lick and suck. I could feel her shudder. I pulled my top off her, throwing somewhere on the floor. Returning my lips as quickly as I could.

Her hand roamed over my chest, she began rolling one of my nipples, making me moan into her throat. Her other hand slipped between us, straight to my clit. I could have fallen on her, she felt how wet I was for her, that was all the encouragement she needed to enter me with two strong fingers. I cried out her name.

After everything I'd put her through today, I wanted to make her come, Make her scream, make her happy. I moved down over her body, her fingers fell out of me, I missed them instantly. She groaned and tried to pull me back. But I was already too close to were I needed to be.

As I ran my tongue though her wet folds I couldn't help but releasing my own little noises. She tasted amazing. There was nothing like her.

"Fuck Naomi."

Her hips bucked into my face. I continued, licking her clit, small fast circles. Her body began to tense, I felt her orgasm coming, I changed slightly sucking. I wanted to make her desperate.

"Jesus, Fucking, fucking Naoms." She was getting pretty desperate. She was absolutely soaking. I loved that I could do this to her.

Her hands were at the side of my head, balled in to fist. I suddenly realised she was trying to stop herself threading her hand through my hair, Over my soar head. I reached my hands up, interlinking our fingers. I wanted to only thing to be occupying her mind to be my tongue.

Seconds later her body flung into the air. She panted my name, I slowed my tongue; tried to ride her orgasm out with her, my lips remained by her until she'd stilled completely. I climbed back up her body, trying not to separate us. She let my hands go. I could see small half moons appear over my skin, illuminated poorly in the darkness. As I reached her chest I could hear her heart hammering. It was once of the most arousing noises.

Her Lips found mine, her tongue touched mine. I briefly wondered if she thought she tasted as good I though she did. I decided not to ask her, She probably get very bashful; which was adorable, but I wasn't as feisty as the Emily I currently had flipping me over.

Without warning she stiffened, stopped and pulled back. I wanted to complain but her smile had me completely stunned.

"So are you asking me to fuck you now?"

"I…."

"Yes or no Naomi?"

"Yes, Definitely yes."

"How much do you want me to fuck you?"


	5. Chapter 5

The last few months had past quickly. I was around half way through my holiday and miraculously (mostly thanks to an early birthday present from my mum) I had almost saved enough for my train ticket.

I'd picked up a part time job at a local bakery. It was all early mornings which were fucking awful, but the pay was decent. I was earning enough to save, contribute to the house and have a life. Plus I was usually finished by lunch.

Following my drug induced head injury I discovered that all my friends had jobs. Cook of course a full time delivery driver, Effy had a few positions she flitted in and out of, she never seemed to go to the same job twice in one week.

Katie had a summer internship at a local fashion agency, and my brainy girlfriend was a library assistant at her university. I asked her why the hell they needed library assistants during the summer when there were no students, she pointed out there were no end of summer courses, PhD students and people employed for research. Granted it was allot emptier than term time. What was nice as she seemed to genuinely enjoy her job.

Even though Cook finished around the same time I did he was never home till much later, if at all. He gave no explanation to his whereabouts and I didn't ask. I just hoped that whatever he was getting up to was legal and relatively safe. Katie usually was last home at around six-ish, Emily between four and five and Effy really just strolled in whenever. This left me home alone for the bulk of my day. It was bloody lonely. I even resulted in going over to Gina's on her days off.

Eventually I found a groove. I turned into a bit of a domestic goddess actually. Spending a couple of hours cleaning, Preparing dinner, just dancing around listening to my ipod. I usually ran out of stuff to do by three.

I was so prepared for my second year and I still had two months to go. I'd completed all my summer work and bitten into second year reading. Apparently I lack the ability to sit and do bugger all. I joined mum on a couple of protests but I was really only going to fill time until Emz came home.

By August I was getting thoroughly worried that I had become some sad automaton who had no life outside their relationship. The kind of people I would have mocked and pitied before Emily Fitch.

"Fucking BORED!" And now I was talking to myself. Pull it together Naomi. I couldn't watch anymore Jeremy Kyle. I swear I could feel my IQ dropping. I turned the tele off and chucked the remote. I didn't care whose baby it was and if the chosen bloke intended to give a fuck.

I picked my phone up off my lap, It had been silently sitting there for an hour. I need more friends. I found Effy's number and hit call.

"Lo."

"Eff, What you doing?"

"Working" Succinct as always. Fucking Cow.

"I'm bored, can we do something, anything," I smiled to myself, remembering when those works sparked something special.

"Sure, Keith's?"

"Yes please." I let out a long breath, I sounded relieved! Fuck me I sounded desperate. I need a life. Either way I chucked on a decent shirt, a jacked and my converse and started walking to the pub.

As per usual Uncle Keith's was dead. The usual alcoholics hunched in the corner with their bitter. Some college kids pissed and giggling made my remember old times. Our education consisted of getting wasted here, and trying not to flunk our exams.

Effy was propping up the wrong side of the bar.

"Eff?" I dropped on a stool, giving her the kind of raised eyebrows that Luke Wilson would be proud of.

"Hey, Pint?" Jesus she sound all bar keepy.

"Erm, sure, why are you pulling pints at Keith's?"

"Helping out." She threw the signature Effy smirk. "I figured this way I can entertain you and make money. That makes me sound a bit like a prostitute."

I had to laugh.

"Yeah, it's a good job, lots of perks."

"Such as…" More eye brow work as I eyed up the dingy pub.

"Don't have to do much, get to drink on the job, for free, special blend, at a discount," she listed off her reasons, they weren't bad reasons.

We spent the next couple of hours chatting, she pulled the occasional pint but other than that we we're uninterrupted.

As four o'clock rolled around I tried desperately to resist the urge to bail on Eff to find my other half. Fortunately for me the mystical Miss Stoneham picked thoughts from my head like a child picking petals.

"Give Emz a call, buy your missus a drink you tight bugger."

I smiled the biggest smile. I longed for Emily; the idea of waiting hours to see her was unpleasant. Not that I hadn't enjoyed my afternoon.

Before I knew it all my housemates were gathered at Uncle Keith's, Eff had been relieved to come and join us. She had called Katie, Cook and Panda. JJ squared it away with his woman and joined us a little later on.

It was nice having almost everyone back together.

We all tried not to think of Freddie.

Panda had returned a few weeks ago, alone. Apparently Thomas was competing all summer. Apparently all he did any more was run, train, run, and compete. It didn't sound like their fresh start in America was going too well. The worst part was Panda didn't seem to care. Maybe people do grow apart.

Seeing her alone made me worry about Emily. I was so terrified of her growing away from me. She must have seen my worry because she gave my hand a reassuring squeeze.

I decided to kiss her; I hadn't kissed her since she'd arrived. Looking all sexy in her tailored shirt. Tease. I really need to stop staring at my girlfriends tits in public.

Suddenly my mind was stuck on dirty thoughts, I couldn't clean it up, I didn't want to. Emily wasn't helping. We were pushed so close together in the tiny booth; she took every opportunity to touch me, even innocent touches like her hand in mine was driving me insane. I'm sure my sex drive was meant to calm down at some point. She knew exactly what she was doing.

Her head rested on my shoulder and I could feel her steady breaths on my neck. She inched closer till her lips touched my skin. I held back shaky breaths as I stood up, climbing over JJ and walked over to the bar.

It was seconds before she was behind me, her arms moving around my waist pulling me into her.

"will you behave?"

"why?"

"because you've seen the bathroom here and I'm not fucking you on JJ's lap, so unless you want me to spontaneously combust…"

"fair enough." she smiled, placed a loving kiss on my cheek and moved to my side.

"so what you fancy Emzie?"

I got a smirk in return, I loved it.

"Ok, But what would you like to drink?"

"what are you having?" she was being too cute tonight.

"Cider."

"then I'll have that." She spun around and drifted back to the table.

I decided that I'd make this our last, I felt pretty hammered, I'd been drinking since midday. Yay for my ever increasing tolerance.

We stopped for Chips. Cook howling with laugher when Emz order a jumbo sausage. "Really I took you for a fish girl" he snorted.

It was pretty late when we got home, well late for me as I had work at 5.30am.

I remember nodding off with Emily's naked limbs entangled with my own.

**Author's Note.**

Hello. Hope this is ok. I've got a bit of writers block. I had a ruff idea of where I wanted this story to go but I've changed my mind. I got bits I want to add but its not really shaping into a narrative. Any advice or ideas people? Would love a bit of help. : P I've realised that even though I want to write happy It's difficult to keep it happy and interesting without writing allot of smut and turning into a full time perve, lol.

I'm enjoying writing but I don't wanna ruin this story. Dunno whether to just round it up in a couple of chapters and start something new.

Let me know. Thanks for reading. Oh and sorry it's a short one.

Laura. x


	6. Chapter 6

Hey ho folks.

I switched perspectives which has giving me a bit of a boost.

Thanks for the nice reviews, its nice to know people are reading this.

Let me know what u think. I'm thinking of adding some Keffy? Let me know.

Sorry for any mistakes.

Much love.

Laura x

Emily POV

My life had become surprisingly perfect. Loving the girl, having her love me back. That wasn't the only cause for my miraculous happiness but it was definitely the reason that consumed the majority of my mind. I spend a great deal of my day allowing my mind to drift, often to her, mostly of us. How perfect it was all becoming. We hadn't really had an easy ride of it. As a rule I don't let my mind wander to unhappier times, times that saw my heart break every time she looked at me.

Forgiving Naomi meant letting go of any pain she's cause, so I let my tears flow away. I remember the night in Freddie's shed; I promised the tears I cried that night would be my last. I wouldn't be upset by Sophia, I wouldn't let Naomi's instinctive need to protect her self and push me away break my heart, I'd let it go and trust her.

But perfection is terrifying. Instead of doing as I promised and letting go I find myself waiting for the other shoe to drop. I knew she loved me, I knew I was her world but I couldn't help but wait and wonder what would rip us apart; I knew no matter what we'd find away back together but how much pain would I find in the meantime.

Things hadn't been good before Naomi's surprise return.

Uni was fine and I was doing really well, But it all felt wrong, The reason we had a bit of a rager the night of my blonds reappearance was because alcohol and spliff were Katie's only ways of coaxing me out of our room, our room which was once my Naomi scented haven. She'd gone away and slowly so was her presence in that room. I'd gotten to the point especially after any of our many fights, that I couldn't leave it. If she was slipping away from me maybe if I worked hard enough I could retain just once piece of her in that room.

It's why I'd picked up the library job. I needed to get out of the house. Where every wall reminded me of her, but it wasn't our home anymore, she didn't live there not really, she was far away. Effy and Katie dominated that house, they tried not to but leopard print was unavoidable and Effy's legs were well…The lesbian in me has to show some appreciation. Eventually I rubbed the 'I love you more than cheese' off the blackboard. It was hard to read every day when she wasn't here to kiss me.

I can officially say that my first year of university had been fucking awful. Not because of uni but because I spent all of it being a complete fucking funsponge.

Even I knew I was pathetic, I'm pretty sure Naom's wasn't down in London clutching a pillow because it smelt like me. Nothing in London smells like me, everything smells like a dirty grotty city. Why the hell would she pick there, literally the most expensive city in Britain. Expensive trains, expensive buses, my little moped wouldn't stand a chance.

The job however had distracted me, so much to do with all the students around that I really didn't have time to think. As long as I stayed away from any section relating to politics or environmentalism. Plus I really got allot of work done. I hadn't thought about summer; and this job would again separate us.

Some how though, two months in I was so blissfully fucking happy, I had a job I liked, it was making me a tidy amount of cash and meant I wouldn't be waiting at home pining for Naomi.

However with the lack of students I had more time, more time to contemplate my flawless life. Its not that I didn't trust her not to hurt us, or that I didn't know in myself that I would never ever hurt her, but I had a bad feeling, it was just too good. I swear Nai's pessimism was rubbing off on me.

The thought of anything off Naomi's rubbing off on me made me smile and abruptly ended my internal rant.

Uni hadn't been so awful I guess, I'd made friends, and nights when Katie had forced me out I'd had a great time getting drunk and having a laugh. I hadn't missed Naomi's jealousy the night of her home coming party. But fuck it I was allowed female friends and I had to deal with the scantly dressed women Naomi lived with.

Thank fuck it was four, the end of my shift. I grabbed my crap and headed for the large revolving door at the libraries entrance, swiping my id card to release the barriers. I fucking love Uni's three grand a year and what do they spend it on? Technology that basically accuses you of theft.

I pushed my way out and threw myself down the concrete steps. It was still bright outside and the campus still had a few people dotted around. I caught sight of her blond hair first. She was stunning, fucking breath taking, how I could doubt us.

Naomi hardly ever came to surprise me from work, mostly because she likes to surprise me when I got home. My mood was instantly elevated by ridiculously dirty thoughts.

She jumped off her bench and practically skipped over to me, I stood waiting for her. I could have run, met her half way, but I loved the anticipation.

It was August and very warm, seasonable some could say, but I live In Britain so I would say its un-fucking seasonable for the sun to be shining in August.

But it did mean that my girlfriend could wear a skirt, without tights, and an amazingly tight tee. So bring on a fucking seasonable August, in fact keep the warm weather all year round.

She stopped inches from me, and pulled out a cupcake, grinning as she brought it to my face. Chocolate with pink icing. Seriously the girl was cute.

"For you." As she pressed a kiss to my cheek. My face was suddenly on fire, it was unbelievable what her lips could do to me, even now.

"Thank you, a cup cake huh? Fair-trade?"

"Of course, who do you think I am? Got it from that café mum creams over" she pressed a kiss into my other check as I took the cupcake from her. I took a regrettably big bite, attempting to respond. So whilst attempting to say "eww Nai" I covered her in crumbs.

She of course mocked me. Once she'd finished sniggering and given me yet another kiss I offered the cake up to her.

We carried on walking and eating, not saying much till the cup cake was gone. I was feeling a searing happiness, I felt the negative thoughts ebbing at the fringes on my mind, I just let myself slip into my lovers comfortable arms, oddly enough she was directing me to town, not home.

"Thank you for my cake." I hummed into her neck, pulling her closer. I do love summer, as cuddly as I find her in a jumper, the fact I can touch her skin in a simple embrace makes summer the best.

"Your welcome little Fitch, I'm glad you liked it."

"Where we going?"

"Town"

"Informative, thanks Effy."

I got a slight nudge in the ribs as a response.

"We are going to the shops for supplies, I am going to buy you something amazing for dinner, and then we are going home to have a naked picnic in the middle of our living room."

Of course I was grinning, wouldn't you be. I pulled her closer, deciding that maybe I could let my hormones run away with me a little, If I was very lucky I'd take Naomi with me.

"That sounds like a pretty great evening, although I can think of three people who might be less than pleased to find me fucking you on the coffee table."

She threw a pair of eyebrows at me. "Ok two people, but that's cuz Cook is a complete and total sex pest."

She snorted, it was such a simple noise, but it was really honest, a side Naomi usually hid from the world.

"Yes, I can only imagine the look of disgust on Katie's face if she found me fucking _you _on our coffee table." Now it was may turn to poke her in the ribs.

"Effy and Katie are going out for dinner, Eff says they'll be back late, and cook text he's staying at a friend's tonight."

"Friends? Cook doesn't have other friends, apart from JJ and I'm sure Lara would have something to say about Cook crashing on her couch."

"I didn't ask babe, to be honest I mostly just saw you and I having the house to ourselves for once and stopped asking questions" She could smirk for Britain.

"Katie and Eff going out to dinner, Interesting." I tried to suppress a smile. They might as well be dating, they do fucking everything together.

"yeah, well, they're close, right, plus I think they wanted to give us some space, apparently your screaming is making Kay nauseous." Another poke for her; I swear she was just winding me up so I'd touch her.

We got home, arms laden with unnecessary shopping. We dumped it in the kitchen, I put the ice cream in the freezer, I'd shut the fridge door and seconds later Naomi was pushing me against it. Our kisses were light and loving, as I brought my hand up to Naomi's cheek to deepen our kiss she pulled away.

She kept backing up until she reached the opposite side, the bottom of her back resting against the worktop. For all her insinuation of fucking me on coffee tables she loved it when I took charge.

I stood with my back against the fridge, it was unsurprisingly cold, plus there were random fridge magnets sticking in my back. But if she could tease me I could tease her.

I rand my hand through my hair, my eyes never leaving hers, my other hand slipped under my top, stroking my stomach, lifting the fabric and exposing my skin. I could see her reacting, her eyes growing darker, nibbling on her bottom lip. He fingers were flexing against the worktop, like she was preparing to push herself back to me.

My darling and oh so subtle sister took that moment to make herself apparent.

"fuck sake fucking lezzas, can you keep you knickers on for ten minutes." She stomped into the kitchen; her heals clicking on the tiles. Bounding straight through the cloud of sexual tension I'd begun building. Effy as per usual was two seconds behind her, but settled for resting against the doorframe.

I looked up at my twin, who looked amazing.

"Wow Katie you look nice." It fell out of my mouth before I could consider anything bitchier to say, considering her intrusion.

"thanks, but I always look fucking mint, you should try sometime, you have tits show um off."

"I'm with Katie there." The queen sarcasm sparks up. I'm pretty sure Naomi should be against me practically getting my tits out in public.

"yeah, not that the shirt doesn't work for you Em," Fucking Effy now. Oddly I suddenly felt like everyone was staring at my tits. I felt myself shrinking a little; I moved over to the kettle, tea, yes, tea.

I might not be Katie's shadow anymore but that doesn't mean I'm a fan of the spotlight. The kitchen was silent; I felt Naomi's arms encircle me as I began putting tea in cups.

"so where you guys going?" Naomi cut through the uncomfortable silence I'd caused.

"Landers, you know on Stonebridge walk?" I didn't need to turn round to know Katie was beaming.

"Oh, that's nice; Nai took me there, very romantic." I beamed right back at her, Naomi of course not missing a beat, the sarky cow.

"Yes, I'm sure you and Eff will have a very intimate evening, bit pricy for a first date, mind you probably guaranteed shag after a meal like that, hey Eff?"

I swiveled round in Naomi's arms, leaving the tea. Katie wasn't enraged, just irritated, she rolled her eyes at Naomi, and walked towards the door, past a chuckling Effy. The both left without another word. I loved that my girlfriend and my sister were friends.

"Didn't fucking deny it did she, we could make a muff muncher of her yet." She placed a series of light kisses on my neck, making me shudder.

"Please stop thinking about Katie's muff; it's such a turn off." I reached up and captured her lips. It wasn't long before our kissing was making out, and making out developed into groping. Her hands were everywhere. I couldn't have been happier.

I pushed myself into her, but she was pushed me back twice as hard, I never left the side. I could feel her heart beating through me, as I ran my hand over her breast and to the place where her heart was hammering; she let out a tiny gasp. Clearly a little embarrassed by how hard it was thumping, it made me swell.

I only lingered there a moment, before my hand slid around her neck, pulling her lips back to mine. Our tongues raged at each other, fighting for control. Naomi removed my shirt in one very swift motion, which considering all the buttons was damn impressive, I liked that shirt but I really didn't care if she had just ripped it off my burning body. She disposed of her tee seconds later, as I was begging to have her back, pressing against me. She pulled me over to her, we moved around a little, just exploring each other, and discarding the rest of our clothes.

I felt the knot in my stomach twist as her fingers grazed the waistband of my underwear, my body tensed in a very recognizable way. I couldn't stop her driving me wild, I had no control. She brought her mouth to my neck, kissing and sucking on my flesh until my head was swirling. I suddenly missed the sideboard, my legs were shaking. I tore at her back with my fingers, getting her as close to me as possible, I'd lost all control of my body, sheer lust taking over.

I felt my back hit something solid, suddenly I was lying down but all I could care about was my gorgeous blond pushing her thigh into me, making me wet, making me gasp.

As her fingers entered me I cried out. I was so glad we were home alone because I don't think I could have been quiet.

The times, years ago, I would lie in bed imagining what making love to Naomi would feel like seemed ridiculous in comparison. Right now the world had melted away and all I could feel was her, her hot sweat covered body and her delicate fingers working inside of me.

After Naomi brought me down from my second spiraling high, I stopped to consider my surroundings. I was balanced precariously on the kitchen table, it wasn't a coffee table but it was pretty close.

"fuck, that was… fuck." My lips returned to hers, I even surprised myself, seconds after an amazing orgasm I could begin again, she inspired it in me.

We spent a few minutes, collapsed in on each other, catching our breaths.

"When did I end up on the table?"

The late summer sun made her hair glow and I was momentarily too caught up in my staring to even hear what she said.

"Huh? Sorry?"

"I said, you seemed unable to wait until we found a softer setting."

I could feel my cheeks getting redder, which must have looked funny considering they were already pretty flushed. I was feeling self conscious again. Which never happened with Naomi, but we were naked, entangled on the kitchen table, I was entitled to feel a little post coital bashfulness.

Our eyes were locked. Her steely blue gaze melting my insecurities, begging me to kiss her again.

Unfortunately our moment was broken by a loud bang. We both looked up and through the kitchen window we saw a topless James Cook leave the side passage and storm off down the garden, into the shed. Slamming the door behind him.


	7. Chapter 7

Author's note :

Hey ho, I know it's short, but I'm already writing the next bit. Hope its ok.

Sorry for any mistakes. As usual I'd love to know your opinions.

Much love. Laura. x

Naomi's POV

I'd spoken to mum briefly about the new addition to the end of the garden. Apparently Katie had asked for Gina permission to build the shed a month or so after I'd left. It had something to do with Effy needing a safe place.

It was odd, Unlike Freddie's shed. Its hard to imagine sheds being very different but this one was, it was more of a brick room. Purpose built to inhabit people rather than old furniture and car parts.

It had started off an Effy only space. But eventually she shared it with Cook. It was amazing that bricks and mortar could help to heal broken people. Emily had said, when I'd come home and mentioned it to her, that Effy rarely escapes to the shed anymore, usually finding solace in her own room. The concept that anyone could find peace sharing a room with the bitchier Fitch was amusing.

I stood outside the white brick building. I decided to knock; I'd never been inside. Never had a reason to before. I banged again; no response. I felt Emily's brown eyes burning holes in the back of my head. She had been less than pleased that I had extracted myself from her and gotten dressed, pissed off even when I'd headed out after Cook.

I wasn't abandoning her but he'd always been there for me, It was about time I started pulling my weight, I'd known something was going on with him since I'd come home.

"fuck sakes, Cook Open the fucking door." I banged for the third and final time. I heard the latch click, the wooden door swinging open moments later.

I stepped in, closing the door behind me. If I'd been able to hear Emily, I'm sure she would have been yelling. I resisted the urge to look up at the kitchen window. I knew she be glaring at me.

Cook plonked himself down on a worn but comfy looking chair; I slid onto an again worn but surprisingly comfy sofa. He took a large swig out of a bottle of Jack daniels, He passed it over. I threw him a hoody I'd grabbed on my way out.

"ta." He nodded pulling it over his head. "smells a bit."

"I washed it." I snorted. He'd grown up allot in the last year, but other than his work clothes he really didn't wash anything. Just pilled up the dirties in my living room. Today as I had planned on making love to my girlfriend there I had chucked a load in the washer. Cringing slightly thinking about how many filthy boxers I'd been near today.

"ta."

"So what the fuck Cook?" I took a swig from the bottle and passed it back.

"Absolutely nuffin blondie, and your sweet ass self?"

"Cook, don't be a prick yeah?" His eyes fell a little, he was giving me ground, what ever was on his mind must be important if he was letting me in.

"Its nuffin, just seeing this bird, its just a bit fucked up, think it's a bit over really." I didn't say anything, he could do better than that, I could tell he was dying to talk.

"I s'pose… Nah,"

"What? I'm not gonna laugh, I'm listening."

"I guess I kinda liked her, Loved her maybe, But she wasn't interested, just a shag I guess."

"I'm sorry."

"Ta blondie, got all the crazy women I need anyway." He was trying to smile but it just wasn't happening. I'd never really seen Cook like this. When Freddie died he bawled. Like really cried his eyes out, couldn't speak, couldn't move, it was heart breaking, somehow this was worse. He was trying not to cry.

"Who?" Probably to personal a question, I shouldn't have asked it, it didn't really matter. He would have told me if he wanted to. But I was curious, Fucking Emily Fitch, I was never so prying before she worked her way into my head. The old cynical Naomi would have let him talk in his own time.

"Karen McLair." And now he was crying. Nothing like before, just water steadily leaking from his eyes and rolling down his face. Other than the occasional shudder he was completely still and silent. Two words that could never usually be used to describe my friend.

"Freddie's sister? How the fuck did that happen?" Again with the prying fucking questions Naomi. Be fucking considerate. I couldn't hide my shock from him. I assumed he'd started dealing drugs after work, not that he was shagging our dead friends sister.

"I dunno really." He sniffed, wiping his face over his hoody sleeve. I just fucking washed that, fucker. Supportive Naomi. Fuck's sake.

He'd calmed down a bit now, was back sipping whiskey.

"The day I got out, I went to the cemetery to visit Freds pay my respects and that, she was there, and we got chatting." Dirty fucker was smiling now.

"Really?"

"No, Not really." And a laugh, fab, he could be rescued.

He chucked me over the bottle, I had another smaller sip, if I went back to the house, back to Emz wankered after a chat with Cook then I'm quite sure sex would be off the cards.

"We've been kinda seeing each other since, It's been a secret course, Karen being, you know, uncomfortable and that."

"wow." I was mostly impressed that Cook had been keeping this to himself for almost a year. You could say allot about him, write novels of what a complete dick he could be, but once thing he wasn't was dishonest, he didn't lie, he gave it to you straight. In my eyes it was one of my favorite qualities about him; it was why I trusted him so much. It was also why I was impressed; hiding anything didn't come naturally to him. To try and change meant everything, she must have meant that much to him.

I couldn't hate Karen, I'm sure she had her reasons but she was throwing him away like rubbish on bin day.

"But it's done now. She's ready to move on, doesn't need me anymore." He seemed pretty devastated, but there was a tinge of happiness in his voice. He wanted the best for her. It made my chest hurt, he deserved better.

"I'm sorry." Again? That was the best I could come up with. Fucking shocking Campbell.

He shrugged at me. But what could I say to him. He kept loving and loosing. Every time he let himself feel anything he got stamped on. He'd probably revert back to man whoring himself around.

"I didn't shag around," I though he was momentarily reading my mind. Reading my confusion he elaborated.

"I was, you know, a one pussy bloke, I didn't cheat."

"that's new, good for you."

"yeah, It was nice, real, like you and red, proper." He was looking sad again.

I threw the bottle back. He took another big gulp.

"So what say you and I go get your missus, get pilled up and hit a club, go fucking mental, I'll get my dick damp and we can forget about the complete pussy I've been in the last ten minutes."

That sounded like fun, but I couldn't. I'd made promises.

"How about we rain check, tomorrow though yeah, Eff and Katie, we'll force JJ out, Panda too. Make a proper day of it." I really hoped I wasn't being the biggest bitch, I knew He needed me; I owed him for more than I could ever admit to.

"Sounds like a plan Naomikins, you can make up for bailing on me tonight, I'm thinking blow job?" wagging his eye brows at me, his smile was almost genuine.

"I'm thinking tazer to the bollocks."

"kinky"

I smirked in his direction. I chose that moment to make my exit. Graciously throwing him an offer to come hang with me and Em, knowing full well he'd refuse.

"I'm good, gonna have a few bevies, footies on." He nodded over to the set in the corner. It was actually pretty decent in here. Katie had done a good job. It was comfy and messy, just like cook, just what Effy had needed.

I opened the door, stepping out; I glanced quickly up at my redhead who seemingly hadn't moved from the window.

"you know where I'll be if you need anything."

"shagging red on the kitchen table, got it." At last a proper laugh, even if it was at my expense. I slapped him playfully on the arm. I turned to leave and he slapped my ass, I action not missed but the irritable woman in the kitchen.

I walked off smiling, but an unhappy knot had worked its way into my stomach. Poor Cook.


	8. Chapter 8

Hey Ho Again.

Another chapter, I'm apparently over the writing block issue :P

I'm a bit knackered after work, I've read through it but sorry for any mistakes.

Let me know what u think.

Much love.

Laura. x

Emily's POV

"Maybe he wants space?" I sighed, watching my sexy girlfriend cover herself up.

"Em." And a look, I get a fucking look. I know I'm gonna let her leave. I'm not that much of a bitch. "I won't be long, kay?" Her voice was soft, careful. She kissed me; it was quick, but soft. Her lips were swollen; they made me want to fall into her. But as soon as the kiss began it ended. And she was gone.

I was left alone and naked whilst she ran off to comfort Cook. I love Cook don't get me wrong; But some days I really could twist his head off his shoulders, the way he looks at her, He flirts, touches her. It's not intimate I know. It's a joke, but it still pisses me off.

I know he's kissed her, he's wanted her, he's touched her tits, and he had meant it. I was jealous that she was running off after him. She could be so fucking considerate; she'd grabbed a jumper on her way out, she'd done his washing. I told myself that she was just bored, but she didn't do Effy's fucking washing.

I found my trousers off the floor and went to grab my shirt; unfortunately my initial assumptions that it had been a sexual casualty were confirmed. I didn't want to trek upstairs to find a t-shirt, that would mean leaving my observation post. Digging through Cooks washing I found one of Naomi's tees. Jealous again. Just the idea of their clothes touching, Jesus I really needed to get a grip. Naomi was A- in love with me. B- A full on lesbian.

I stood staring out the window down the garden. He wasn't letting her in. Good, maybe she'd come back here, and we could continue with our potential evening of depravity.

No of course not. She swung the door behind her. Shutting me out.

"Shit." jealous, they could now have a private little chat.

I found myself trying to fine reasons to continue being in the kitchen. Fucking Naomi, everything was always so clean and tidy now. I tipped away our cold milk-less tea, I took a stupid amount of time rinsing the mugs. I flicked the kettle on. I didn't really want tea. But like I said needed a reasonable excuse to remain in the kitchen.

After making my tea, I pretty much just stood there, pouring through and old heat mag I'd found in a draw. Oddly it was calming. I found myself chuckling at random articles, remembering the bizarre conversations it had created.

Naomi had once gushed a little too much about a particular Kirsten Steward, Rob Pattison story, despite hating all things twilight. Eventually we were pretty much ogling the leading ladies bikini choices.

Eventually Naomi surfaced, she not been long. I watched Cook slap her arse, controlled the desperate need to shred the magazine in my hands, I was letting it go. I really, really was.

I threw my face back into my mag, I'm sure my face would give me away. I could be mature.

"Hey." I hey'd her back through the pages. She wasn't buying it.

She slunk her arms around my hips and pulled me to her, my arms never lowering. My face still covered, Which was a very good thing as her hips meeting mine made my body sear and my cheeks blush.

"Emzie? Em?" I looked over my book at her. She grabbed it from me and placed it on the side. She's looking right through me, I can feel it.

"I love you." Fuck sake, and all is fucking forgiven, I'm such a girl.

"I know, I'm sorry I can be a tit."

"Don't be silly." She stood back a little, her fingers playing with the hem of my top. Well her top, but it was currently on my body. "This is nice, suits you."

It was nothing special, just a thin oversized tee, fell off the shoulder on one side. It was really comfortable actually; it was so light it was like not wearing clothes. She was smiling but she didn't mean it.

"I made tea, Grab Garibaldis." I sensed she could use a cuddle.

We worked our way into the living room. I made myself comfortable on the sofa; she curled up in the crook of my arm, her head rested on my stomach. I nibbled away at my biscuit, realising I was sprinkling crumbs in her hair, Covering her in food for the second time that day.

I giggled flicking bit of biscuit out of her blond locks. She climbed up me.

"right, that's it I'm removing your garibaldi privileges." She smiled properly and munched the biscuit straight out of my hand.

"Cook okay?" I did genuinely want to know. Like I said I do love Cook, I just sometimes don't like him very much.

"Not really. He's in love with Freddie's sister."

I cringed at the mention of his name; it still hurt too much to think that he was dead. Everyone else was dealing and moving on, I didn't really know how. The thought of what Foster did to him still kept me awake some nights.

I returned from my grief to let Naomi statement sink in.

"In love?"

"yup, they've been together a while apparently, she's broke it off now though. He's not dealing too well." I could understand that, who can cope when someone you love breaks your heart. I lived with Cook for almost a year, I'd not noticed any relationship, I really had been absorbed in my own shit.

Naomi pretty much recounted word for word what Cook had told her. She wasn't breaking any confidences, Cook knew she told me everything, being open with each other was one of the only relationship rules we had these days. I should probably talk to her about my doubts and fears. Not now though.

We stayed like that for a while, until the sun set. We talked about cook, Katie and Effy mostly, our friends whom all had changed so much. Naomi was suddenly so interested in everything she'd missed while she was in London. I guess she made me notice how much things had changed since Freddie's death. The people I once called friends had become more real to me than my own family. We were a family in a strange way. Naomi said she felt like she was part of a family that had chosen her, not just been forced to accept her, It made her felt special, she thanked me.

Once it had gotten dark we must have fallen asleep, I would force her to make up her promises of a picnic in the living room, I'm sure she would be more than eager. But we awoke to the sounds of pots crashing in the kitchen. We were wrapped up together on the small sofa, a blanket tucked round us carefully. I assumed Katie or Effy had covered us when they got home.

We slowly removed ourselves from each other. Stretching out tight muscles.

We reached the kitchen at the same time as Effy and Katie did.

Cook was making breakfast.

In true Cook fashion it was messy. There was glass on the floor and he was swearing with a fag in his mouth.

"Morning ladies!"

Katie moved first, picking the fag straight out of his mouth. She threw it our of the open kitchen window. It would have gone unnoticed but the billowing black smoke highlighted its exit.

"Cook? Seriously?" Naomi Giggled front behind me.

"What? I'm making pancakes, with Nutella." He winked at Effy, She smiled back and walked over taking both the spatula and cremated batter mixture away from him. Without a word inspecting the damage.

Naomi began sweeping the floor removing the shards of broken glass. She wasn't wearing shoes, it made me worry. I could hear a very motherly sentence forming in my throat.

Cook grabbed a dustpan and brush, relieving Naomi of sweeping duty, and just generally relieving me.

"Cook killed the frying pan. This isn't coming off." Effy held up the saucepan and smirked.

"We'll get another." Naomi spoke cutting Katie off before the obscenities could poor out. She was very good at protecting people. She always was I guess, she protected me from my family, from Katie in the very early stages of our relationship; I guess she just couldn't protect me from herself.

I pushed away the ruinous thoughts, not today, today was Saturday and as a rule hangover free Saturdays were usually awesome.


	9. Chapter 9

Ello folks.

Playing with perspective again. Let me know if you like where I'm heading with this.

Big thank you to… lumagoo1015, imoan12, fr3nzzy, really appreciate it guys. Anyway, review guys please I need the motivation, And reassurance that people are enjoying this story so it's worth me continuing.

Take care.

Laura. x

Effy POV

Safe, healthy, happy.

The three words I was trying to live my life by these days. I tried not to move, to commit to any action that didn't comply with this mantra.

I liked to think it was keeping me alive, but it didn't take much soul searching to know she was keeping me alive. She kept me safe, healthy, happy.

I needed her in a way I've never needed anyone. Not mum, not Tony, not Freddie.

Katie fucking Fitch.

I knew Emily's fear, I could see right through her happiness. I felt a similar anxiety beat within my own heart. Life was so good, better than when Freds was still alive. I smiled now and meant it. I took drugs recreationally, not to keep myself whole. We made plans for my future.

Naomi danced with Emily, let her fly high and fall hard, feel the Technicolor range of human emotion. I guess I envied it, what they had. Katie was so careful with me. Her misplaced guilt fuelling her constant care.

Ironic really. Freddie would have killed me, but Katie held my head above the current, she had carried me until I could paddle.

I'd been awake for an hour at least, just watching her sleep. She looked peaceful, beautiful. When we'd gotten in that night, such a fucking good night, we'd found Emily and Nai asleep in the living room.

Katie had covered them. Making sure her sister and her girlfriend were completely encased before we left. She was astonishing. I don't know if she'd changed or just started being more honest.

Cacophony down stairs stirred Katie.

"Eff?" she mumbled, it was fucking cute.

"Present."

"what the fuck was that?"

"probably Naomi fucking your sister on a tower of precariously balanced plates."

"eww, Eff."

"I dunno, wanna get up?" I leant forward and kissed her shoulder. I hadn't thought about it. She was pretty used to me touching her by now, Katie grounded me, pushed the voices away, when she held my hand they were almost silent, all but one. Freds.

"no." she stretched out her limbs, stretching into me, the contact was nice. I tried not to linger over it.

Slipping out of bed, still stretching, she changed out of the large tee and baggy pyjama shorts, into strappy top and hip hugging jogging bottoms. I let a laugh slip out, which she ignored. She had to look good; she couldn't have just gone downstairs in what she was wearing. I slid out, picking up her discarded t-shirt, slipping it over my head, it was long enough to cover me. I couldn't rightly go down in my pants, and getting dressed was out of the question; plus this shirt smelt amazing. Katie's lips twitched into a smile.

After the kitchen disaster Naomi and I remade Cook's breakfast. I do love Nutella pancakes. The five of us sat around the kitchen table, happily eating. Katie filling any conversational lull, telling the others about our dinner. Skipping important details; like my hand in hers.

I can understand her reluctance to discuss what was happening between us. It was far from her comfort zone. She was scared for herself, worried for me. I wasn't going to push her, risk pushing her away. I didn't really know what was happening. I loved her, I needed her, she knew that, but I also wanted her.

She'd talk to me eventually. She always did.

A buzzing on the side drew all our attention. My phone.

Anthea calling.

"Hi mum."

"Hi sweetheart, I was hoping you could pop over for lunch? Catch up a bit? You can bring Katie." My mum was actually becoming a real mum.

"yeah, sounds good, one?"

"brilliant, I'm looking forward to it."

She hung up seconds later. I informed Katie of mine, or rather our lunch plans.

"shit." She flicked between me and the clock. "I have to be somewhere at one."

"Oh, okay, don't worry." I tried not to sound disappointed, my mum mite be acting motherly at the moment but it still was difficult being at the house I once called home. It would be harder without Katie. But who was I to tell her where to go and what to do.

I left the group down stairs, I was first into the shower, I'd have to be quick or I'd drain the hot water and Katie would scold me.

I left the bathroom, it was steamy and warm. The hall was cold. I shivered through my towel. The radiators in this house sucked.

I pulled out a dress shirt, found some tights and a decent pair of boots, I think they might have been Naomi's. I was about ready to face the world alone.

Katie entered our room, wrapped in her very own towel. I tried not to stare.

"Emz is going for me; I'm going come with you."

"Its fine Katie, you should make your appointment."

"I just had to pick something up. Even Naomi should be able to manage that. So I'm fucking coming with u."

I swallowed my smile. Looking in the mirror, I decided to change.

Naomi POV

Emz and I left at twelve. Fucking Katie had us marching over to a jeweller across the city. It wasn't all bad though, it been a while since we'd ridden on the orange moped.

I'd been to his shop before; I'd picked up Emily a few bits from here at Christmas last year. The jewellery was different to anything I'd expect from Katie. It was subtler for one.

We approached the woman manning the kiosk. The shop was quaint and filled with items; you could spend a day searching for pieces in here.

The woman, presumably the owner, looked Emily over more than once.

I'd seen it a thousand times, people who expect Katie and are unsure when Emily arrives. My girl handles this in her stride, she doesn't even notice anymore.

"Hi, I'm Emily Fitch, I'm here to pick up something for my sister Katie."

It dawns on the docile woman behind the desk that she's talking to a twin. She was a bit of an old hippy really, reminded me of my mother; or rather Gina before she found Kieran.

"Yes, Miss Fitch, do you have your receipt?" Emily grabs the sheet Katie gave her this morning, pushing it over the counter into the woman's grasp.

"Lovely" she reached under the counter, pulling out a black leather binder and a square, flat box. "If you could tell your sister, I really enjoyed working with her, I would love to again, she really has a talent for this market."

Emily put the binder in her bag, pulled the box up to her face. I could see the curiosity burning in her eyes. Clearly the aging proprietor hadn't missed Emily's snooping.

"ahh, of course, you should have a look make sure its appropriate." It took literally seconds for Emily to accept her offer, letting the woman open it for her, crafty.

It was a necklace; it wasn't anything Katie would ever wear. Its intended owner was very clear. This belonged to Effy.

Emily and I shared a few meaning full glances, she was think exactly the same. I hid my laughter and swallowed one sarcastic comment after another.

It was Effy's birthday next week, and this gift blew our 'couple of books and a DVD' out the water.

"So, what do you think? I think we successfully completed your sister's designs." Oh this was just too much. Emily look like she was about to cry.

Who knew Katie the original Fitch bitch could be so fucking nice.

What shocked me most is the fact she let me come along for this little shopping trip, she must know I'd have to take the piss.

We left after that, stopping in a café for lunch. Emily wouldn't take her hand off her bag, she was now itching to see what was inside that black folder, I could see it raging in her. I wasn't going to give her an excuse to go perving where she didn't belong. I loved her but she was impossibly nosey sometimes.

"Just a quick look?"

"No, it's not yours to go rooting through, ask Katie when we get home I'm sure she'll show you."

I got an eye roll in return. But it seemed to settle her fidgeting.

I plucked her twitching hand from her satchel, bringing her hand up to the table top. My fingers stroked hers; I got lost in those eyes for almost forever. The waitress brought over our lunch, which apparently was enough to break our mental tryst. Emily and food, a match not to be rivalled with.

I pulled my chair closer to the table, consciously trying to be closer to her. I wasn't too interested in my sandwich, I disposed of it quickly. I wasn't going to order anything but Emily insisted that she wasn't going to spend another night holding back my hair while I emptied the contents of my stomach purely because I was stupid enough to skip a couple of meals and then drink my weight in vodka.

I inched my right leg forward, allowing my knee to graze her leg.

Her eyes caught mine again; we fell back into out our comfortable world, where nothing existed but the two of us. She carried on eating, her eyes never leaving mine. Reality reformed around us as the same waitress came and collected our plates. Emz and I continued sitting in a comfortable silence, I shifted so my legs could bump hers; she took my hands from the table and returned to playing with my digits.

There was nothing particularly sexual about any of it, but suddenly I was very angry at the table, this stupid wooden barrier meaning that grazing knees and touching digits were the maximum we could expect from each other.

I slipped some money on the table; I was hoping I could convince my redhead straight home, the promise of many orgasms only speeding up her lap of H&M.

People say that Emily and Katie are completely different, not like most twins whom apparently are pod people. Not Emily and Katie, they're individuals now. Bullshit, is all I can say to that, because if you've ever been shopping with the Fitch sisters you can tell the share the same DNA.

The Amount of time I'd spent sitting on my arse, rein acting the hetro cliché, waiting for her to erupt from a changing room with arms full of clothes she'd decided she didn't really like. I liked shopping, but Jesus Christ.

At this rate I was going to be too exhausted to go out, let alone fuck my girlfriend beforehand.

Eventually I convinced her to go home. She tried bargaining for another hour, but fuck that.

It was a good thing too because Katie was spitting feathers when we got home.

"Where the fuck have you been?" It had gone six, which meant I'd been walking around clothes shops for like four hours.

"Ask your sister, she's the one with the shopping problem." I squeeze past her, dragging a few of Emily's bags upstairs.

I was surprised to find a Miss Stonem routing through my draws. After dumping my, well Emily's bags on our bed I though I'd ask Eff what she was doing perving over my personals.

"do you mind?"

"no, not really." Cheeky bitch didn't even look up. "can I borrow that dress? the black one, with the lacie shoulder bits?" She was still pulling at clothes in my draw. She cocked her head to one side and pulled out something silk and short, something she was definitely not meant to be looking at let alone touching.

"Hello, Miss Campball, I didn't know you had it in you!" The expression on her face was pure joy.

"For starters it's Emily's, secondly It's… its none of your fucking business you perve." I blushed a little. I snatched the nighty out of Effy's grip, stuffing it back into the open draw, pushing it shut once the offending piece of clothing was safely concealed.

"Anyway, normal people hang dresses up, so the wardrobe would be a better starting place." After a quick hunt I found the demanded dress.

You got to say living with three other girls had its advantages, sharing clothes, make up, various toiletries. However it also had serve downsides, like for one week a month the house became very hostile. Well for all but Katie and Cook, who often observed our hormonal battles and laughed.

Once Effy had left I decided to jump in the shower, soon everyone would start to get ready and finding any privacy in the bathroom would be merely impossible. I let the hot water melt away the day's stresses. I found myself thinking about Katie's necklace, or rather the necklace Katie had made for Effy. It was an amazing present. The effort and thought that had gone into its design and construction was clear. I tried to block the barrage of romantic thoughts that pushed to the foreground of my mind. It wasn't like that with them. They took care of each other, they loved each other, and it didn't make them gay. I snorted to myself at the thought of Katie converting to the Sapphic side.

I left the steamy warm bathroom, the hall was freezing, Jesus the radiators in this house sucked. I ran to our bedroom, hoping to find Em. I was pleasantly rewarded with my redhead pulling my in for a kiss. My teeth were chattering.

Emily ran her hand up and down my arms, trying to warm me up, she was succeeding but it had nothing to do with friction. She kissed me again, I was very aware than I was naked beneath my towel, she was still completely clothed.

The cogs turned in her mind, seeing were my forceful kisses were leading us.

"Babe, I'd stay and continue this, but I really want to shower before Katie kay?"

"Why didn't you just come join me?" I smirked

"Because you rushed off without me, you moody cow." She poked me playfully. "make it up to me later?" she looked at me with dirty eyes, why couldn't I make it up to her now?

My question was answered for me, in the form of JJ. Spluttering at the sight of Em and I.

"Fuck J, Knock much?" Emily giggled, stepping in front of me, not that her tiny form really concealed me. I really do have a knack of making myself out to be a beast.

"Fuck… Sorry…Fuck."

"J…JJ…?" The curly haired boy, well man now, looked up. "Locked on J." Emily smiled at him, ushering him out.

I was left alone, Emily's warmth started to dissipate. I dug out a couple of items, settling on a dress. It was dark navy blue, short enough I wouldn't get shit off Katie and short enough for Emily to approve. I looked pretty good.

I was almost completely content until I couldn't find my black knee high boots.

"Fucking Stonem. Where the fuck are my fucking boots." I mumbled under my breath. I heard Emily leave the bathroom, and Katie shuffle in. I stomped straight into Katie and Effy's room, knowing that my brunette friend would probably have swiped them. She being the only compatible size in the house, that and Katie really wouldn't be caught dead in anything I owned.

I'd been in this room before; I'd spent a fair bit of time in here with Eff. But it seemed different today.

At home Katie and Emily had shared a room, in which you could have drawn a physical line down the centre separating the two sisters. But this room was different; it was a clear amalgamation of the two occupants. Oddly like my bedroom, the contents of which were now ours, not mine or hers. The bed was unmade, and you could see the well where the two girls had been lying, they must have slept closely. I pushed these thoughts to the back of my head, Stop seeing gay everywhere. I cursed at myself.

"Eff, where are my boots, the ones you like to wear with the green dress?" I signed at her. She produced my boots without a word. And by produced I mean pull them off her feet. Cheeky cow.

Before long we were all assembled, the drink was flowing, it was like old times, tonight was going to be interesting.


	10. Chapter 10

Hey Ho.

Sorry about the weird chapter lengths, lol.

Hope you guys are enjoying this story, please review and let me know.

Take Care.

Laura. x

Emily's POV

Right now might actually be the happiest moment in my entire life. Either that or ecstasy does make you love everything.

I was stood in the middle of some club. I couldn't tell you which one because I've been paralytic since before we got here. Naomi's little tumble those months ago really has taught me nothing. The music was pounding through me, my heart wasn't beating normally anymore, it just thumped to the rhythm.

Effy passed me another pill; She'd stopped trying to pass them the Naomi who was being a bit of a funsponge.

I moved away, dancing into randoms. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Katie and Effy passing a pill. Odd as Eff had handed me mine.

It didn't matter, I could feel Naomi pushing into me, I lent back. Her arms were holding me up. We danced together. I take back the funsponge comment.

The world was a blur, the ground was uneven. Naomi lent down, placing kisses along my neck, stopping only to nibble on my ear. I felt like my legs were giving way. Naomi responded to my lack of stability, pulling me closer, encircling me with both arms. She walked me forward; we left the dance floor, which was fucking awful, my ears burned in the quiet. Cold air hit me like a fist; if she hadn't been holding me it would have toppled me.

"you need air." She said whilst lighting up.

She lent me against the wall, and I felt my back sliding down brick, it was rough but it didn't hurt. The cold was gone which was nice, alcohol always gives you certain immunities.

I realised I was sitting, my knees hunched up to my chin, which in this skirt was probably very revealing. That would explain why Naoms was kneeling in front of me, pushing damp hairs off my face. She was trying to catch my gaze, but my eyes couldn't sit still.

She must have put her fag in my mouth because my next breath was warm and nicotine laden.

"Do you want to go home?" She didn't sound concerned. I laughed, I'd be giving her such shit if our roles were reversed, she didn't mind taking care of me, no matter what state I got myself into. But I had a very low tolerance for drunken Naomi. Apart from her soaring sex drive she was mostly just a bitch, a bitch who liked to throw up on my shoes, well Katie's shoes.

"depends." I slurred.

"depends on what Emz." I giggled, I felt very mischievous.

"Well here there's dancing, dancing and drink, dancing. What at home that's soooooooooo special?" I could here the words coming out of my mouth, but I can't remember the conversation my brain had with my tongue that produced them.

"Well, there is a very warm comfy bed, I will be there. I won't be wearing much." She stood up and held out her hands. I of course took them. She could say there was storm of spiders at home but she'd be there naked and I follow her happily. Once I was back on my feet, which took more than one attempt, Nai removed the fag from my mouth, it had about one drag left in it, I don't remember smoking it. We began stumbling home. We didn't even contemplate a taxi, no driver in their right mind you pick me up right now.

It dawns upon me that I'm cuddling in to a jacket, it's not mine, but it smells good, must be hers, which means she's getting cold. I pull her closer; I don't want her to be cold. I vaguely remember being in the bathroom.

Naomi POV

Tonight, I had intended on getting drunk, actually smashed, I'd done a shit load of shots with Cook and gotten a bit messy. I danced with him for longer than I ever had before. Normally when we went out he disappeared. Cook wasn't enjoying his sexual freedom; he clearly wasn't interested in pulling tonight.

I must have lost track of time, I only realised because I'd begun to miss Em.

I left Cook jumping around with JJ and panda, groping through the crowd for my little red, it didn't take long to find her.

Arms in the air, jumping and swaying. Not on her own unfortunately. There was some random ass hole was attached to her. Grinding and pushing.

I leave her for five fucking minutes, where the fucks her sister?

I couldn't be angry, she probably hadn't even noticed him, or the other men who were pushing in on her space; wanting to get to know her better. I flipped him off, absorbing the 'fuckin' dyke' comment as I dragged Em away from the gaggle of Cocks. I found the others, feeling a bit better with Emily close.

Katie had seemingly poured a bottle of vodka down my girlfriends throat, that combined with tabs Effy was passing tonight Emily was thoroughly fucked.

I turned down Effy's offerings, if I got any worse we would probably be sleeping in the ally outside.

Katie and Effy downed drink after drink, slowly descending into their own peace. Like Emz and I at lunch they let the world slip away. I tore my eyes away; it felt like I was intruding.

A little after three am, Emily and I were dancing, It was incredibly sweaty and incredibly sexy, If I hadn't been holding her up I would have fucked her there and then. I had a feeling that she'd be in no state when we finally got home. My unbearably sexy girl took another Tab off Eff, I was making this her last, Emily never really understood the concept 'too much of a good thing'.

I was dragged me though the dance floor, whether she was even aware of me at this point was debatable.

As I looked back I saw Effy passing Katie a pill, it would have been innocent enough, but Katie ran her hand up Effy's neck and into the brunettes' wavy locks. My eyes were transfixed on them, kissing, groping, it wasn't desperate or urgent, it was loving.

I looked down at my drunken beauty; something told me she might not respond appropriately to seeing her previously homophobic sister making out with her best friend. Home time.

By the time we arrived home Emily was practically asleep. Her legs moving forward even though her eyes were closed and the majority of her weight was taken up in my arms. She'd thrown up on me twice on the way home. Tomorrow was going to be fun for her. This officially makes up for the getting drunk and concussing myself fandango. She was so gone.

I had to carry her upstairs, making a stop in the bathroom so she could throw up again. I brushed her teeth, which was adorable. I'm winning girlfriend of the year. I picked her up again, my legs not supporting me as I would like to have hoped, I slipped slightly, protecting her head with my shoulder, The wall was really cold. It hurt like fuck. Emz wouldn't be the only one suffering tomorrow.

Once we were all tucked up I checked the time, half five. Fucking hell.

I heard the front door. Dainty feet on the stairs, heels removed.

Shit Heels, where had I put Emily's shoes? I took them off the first time she'd been sick, I put them down to hold back her hair, shit did I pick them up?

They were her favourites.

I looked down at my unconscious girlfriend, she was dead to the world, dribbling on her pillow, and she wouldn't notice my absence. The noises coming from next door were less than subtle, I'd rather avoid them.

I grabbed a pair of jeans, and a hoody, it wouldn't take ten minutes unhindered to make it back and pick them up. Yes, definitely in for girlfriend of the year.

I had left them. I made a promise not to be so careless next time. Revisiting Emily's bail sight was fucking nasty; I picked up her heels and started off home. I momentarily shit myself as Cook, JJ and Panda ran up behind me.

All was quickly forgiven as they were carrying chips.


	11. Chapter 11

**Hello. Sorry for the delay in updating, I've not left work in days! Merry Christmas to all, incase I don't have chance to update again. I hope you're enjoying reading this, review if you can because it really does make my day.**** Anyway sorry for any mistakes, and its gets a little smutty towards the end :P**

**Wishing you all a happy and healthy 2011.**

**Laura x**

Naomi's POV

I stretched into my girlfriend whom was curled up in my arms.

It took a couple of seconds for last nights events to fill my mind. Apart from my gorgeous naked girl snoring against my chest, the first thing my mind grabbed was an image of Katie pushed up against Effy, tongues colliding. Should I tell Em? When she awoke sober? It wasn't really my place. But I couldn't' hide things from her, lies had nearly destroyed us, and I wasn't naive enough to think that nothing could ever take her from me again.

A distant buzzing dragged me out of my thoughts. I looked the bedside table, my phone sat silent and still, it must be Emz's, it would wake her if I didn't find it. I took seconds to find her purse from last night, it was sticky, covered in dried up drinks.

Mum calling. Jenna great. I moved out onto the landing. Em should work more of the narcotics out of her system before she attempted to take on the day.

"Hello"

Silence.

"Hello Jenna." I forced myself.

"Hello Naomi, I'd like to speak to my daughter."

"Which one?" I said it before thinking; Jenna wasn't a big fan of sarcasm, I don't suppose chuckling to myself really was appropriate either. Well the woman hated me; I only made the effort for Em. I realised she'd not responded, I would imagine she was turning an interesting colour.

"she's sleeping, I can get her to call you back."

"Its half twelve." She sounded shocked, I suppressed another giggle. It had been a long night; somehow I don't think mama Fitch would appreciate a tale of Emily's escapades last night.

"It's Sunday." I shot back, defending our need for a lie in. The last thing I want Jenna Fitch to believe is that the manipulative whore that was Naomi Campbell was allowing her innocent daughter to waste her life in bed.

I heard noises from downstairs. Praying it was Katie. "I think Katie's up, I'll get her if you like." The older woman huffed over the phone.

"If that's the best you can do." I think she was trying to insult me, but only succeeded in insulting her other daughter. I was glad she was talking to me. Katie didn't need that. Shit, when did I start protecting Katie fucking Fitch?

I strolled into our kitchen, finding all of my friends cackling.

I passed the phone over to Katie.

"Jenna." I motioned. Katie's eyes sunk into mine. She looked guilty. I think I just killed the mood, Effy eyed me up.

"Morning mum."

I could here Jenna shrill tones. Let Katie deal with her.

Effy was making breakfast, full English If I wasn't mistaken.

"Any of that going spare?"

"Yes, I've made you and the missus enough. How is emz?" the typical knowing smirk graced her lips.

"Sleeping, I'll go wake her for food; if she misses bacon I'll suffer."

"Mum, for fucks sake we'll come okay. And by we I mean the four of us." Katie paused, absorbing Jenna's reply "I don't care how many seats we have. Mum, Emily and I will be there but Naomi is coming too, so is Effy, deal with it. If you can't we'll stay home till you can."

More yapping from Jenna.

"Mum, I know where my home is. Look enough okay, we've talked about this."

There was a pause. Along with me and Effy, Cook, JJ and panda were all captivated by the call raging in the kitchen.

"So are you still inviting Emily, Naomi, Effy and I to a family dinner?"

I'm assuming there was a yes. Katie hung up.

She walked over to the kitchen window and threw Emily's blackberry out onto the patio. She screamed in rage. I vaguely wondered if it landed on Cook's fag from yesterday.

I moved to comfort Katie, A move I wouldn't have normally made, but right now standing up to Jenna like that, she reminded me of my dozing redhead.

I needn't have bothered; Effy left her frying pan, pulling Katie into a hug. Yesterday that would have been sweet and friendly. This morning it was intimate. I smiled to myself, remembering the distinctive noises coming from my roommates. Katie was a screamer. Emily's phone was lying in pieces outside.

I was pulled back from my amusement, Jesus Christ; I was going for a Fitch family dinner. I'd bet my last pound it was today. Not only because I was in no mood to battle a Fitch bitch but because Emily would be in no fit state to get out of bed, let alone force down a truly appalling example of a Sunday roast.

I turned to go rouse Emily, I'd only left a few minutes ago but I already felt her absence leaking into me. I started up the stairs, noting I wasn't alone. My second favourite twin was hot on my heels. Before we reached the top step, she stopped me. She pulled me round to look at her, I was a step higher than her, and with my naturally superior height she was craning her neck in order to look me square in the eyes. I couldn't tell if she looked defensive or aggressive.

"You saw." I was very matter of fact. I nodded, trying to give her a supportive look, she instantly softened, I could see her whole body officially relax. Was she expecting me to be a bitch?

"Please don't tell Em." Shit, four words I would have begged not to hear.

"Don't ask me to do that."

"Please, I'll tell her, just give me time, give me time yeah?" she looked so gentle, I felt for her.

"I won't lie Katie. If she asks, I won't lie. Okay?" She nodded "If she suspects I'm lying I will throw you to the wolves Kay?" she nodded again. Her eyes were filling up, Katie doesn't cry. For the second time in five minutes I feel the need to hug Katie Fitch. More surprisingly she accepted my embrace. She sniffed back her tears.

"If you need to talk Katie, I'll listen." I placed a small kiss on her head.

She snorted, pushed me off.

"Sure lezza, thanks, now go wake Amy Winehouse, dinners at three." Her smile was almost convincing. I remember how good it felt the first time I told someone about Emily. It was like breathing after you'd been drowning.

I scowled at her.

"If she doesn't want me there why should I go?"

"Because Em will need you, because she's a bitch and needs to learn to stop being so fucking homophobic, because Effy _has_ to come with me and She'll need you cuz mum hates her too. Kay?" all convincing reasons I guess.

"You gonna sort Emzie's phone out?"

"Yes, I'll go put it back together."

We found out later it was pretty fucked, but Katie promised to replace it.

Emily's POV

Fucking hell, it's fucking hot in here. I'd kicked off all of the covers, but the room was so stuffy. I wasn't awake, but I wasn't asleep.

I hadn't realised I was alone either. Naomi must have come back to bed, she had cold feet, they were perfect, brought my temperature back from the brink. Next night out, fewer drugs. The night a whole was blurred, I decided to leave the majority of my memories in the blurry abyss. Nai rolled on top of me; she was so cool, moving against me in all the right ways, her icy skin brushing mine.

I could feel myself snapping out of my sleepy daze, her lips touched mine, undoing all her hard work by starting a fire in my head. The second kiss I couldn't help by arch into her. Which was when I realised I was naked.

My chest met hers, I deepened our kiss and literally melted into her. My head was still swimming, still suffering from the amounts I'd consumed hours before, my limbs we're responding as I would have liked, they all felt heavy.

Naomi rolled over to one side, she lay across my side of our bed, I must have pushed myself over when she'd left.

Propping herself up on one elbow, she moved her hand over my tummy and chest, tracing the patterns the curtains were projecting. My body was reacting to her, I felt myself getting wet.

"Good morning." Her lips met mine again. I rolled from my back to face her. Nibbling on my bottom lip, whilst sliding my hand into her hair.

"right good news or bad news?" She pulled back a little, I sighed, fell back into the sheets. Perhaps a little too quickly, I felt my head rush.

"Bad news."

"We are going to Sunday dinner at your parents house."

Fuck, why, Jesus, I let another sigh drift out, I closed my eyes. The morning had started out so well.

"Good news?"

"Effy had done a fry up,"

Somehow the bad news drowned out the good news. Though I suppose it would be good to eat something substantial, as my mother cooking would be turned down at a homeless kitchen.

I was officially on a downer. I tried to stand up but the dizziness forced me back onto the bed. I sat on the edge, letting my feet find the carpet. Naomi climbed out kneeling in front of me, and other than her pants she was completely naked. I felt my mood improving a little. She pushed some of my wild hair back, trying to keep it of my face. Her lips kissed my forehead.

"I love you." I took her hands in mine, kissing each hand.

"I love you." I mirrored her words, they meant everything to me.

Dinner wouldn't be so bad, my mother was getting better, she still treated Naomi like shit, but at least these day she recognised her as being a part of my life, so it might be imperfect but at least we were moving towards acceptance.

I love food. Effy's breakfast washed the rest of the alcohol and ecstasy out of my system. Yay, I was sober, now just wait for the handover to begin. I wasn't looking forward to this afternoon's obligation. I would much prefer to take my blond back to bed. Naomi was doing her best to put me in a contented mood. She was the one who would be berated all dinner, I should be reassuring her.

Fitting seven of us round the kitchen table was fun. It was familiar like how family should be.

Katie and Effy were doing a 'one cheek on, one cheek off' thing, and Naomi was acting as my chair. It did making eating difficult but I wouldn't move for all the sausages in Lincolnshire. Eventually Naoms gave up, leaving her food and put her hands to better use winding me up.

"you gonna finish that?" I mumbled a mouth full of toast. I tried not to choke on my breakfast as Naomi's hand skirted the underside of my breast.

She dutifully pushed her plate over to me. I forgot about breakfast, her eyes caught mine. She brushed crumbs off my cheek and stretched up to kiss me.

We got a little overheated, but it had been too long since the last time I'd felt her inside of me.

"Can you not fuck my sister on the kitchen table?" It wasn't as angry as you would expect, she was being nice to us. Why the fuck was that?

My drug addled synapses began to fire; it wasn't long before I was giggling along with Naomi. I realised Cook was laughing to, I began to blush.

"What am I missing." Katie looked a little horrified and quite cunningly pushed hers and Effy's chair away from the wooden slab.

Naomi's stood up, relocating me back on my feet. I threw her a questioning look, nodding at the half eaten plate I was yet to devour. She grabbed my hand and dragged me away. I couldn't complain; I'm sure she'd make up to me.

She positioned me against the bathroom door. "stay." Her one word command was laced smut. God I love this girl. She made pyjamas sexy, she made everything sexy. She pushed the door open and threw two towels inside, they landed on the toilet. She swiftly moved against me, pushing me onto the tilled floor, kicking the door shut behind us. I pushed her back into it. I clicked the lock and moved my hand back to her body.

My mouth moved against her lips, my tongue met hers and I released a muffled moan.

Naomi's left hand travelled to the hem of my t-shirt, moving her palm over my hip, drawing me closer to her.

We moved through the bathroom, removing our clothes as we got closer to the shower. Naomi tried to turn the damn thing on without leaving me. Unfortunately it really did need attention in order to get it working correctly.

Once the hot water started flowing she was reattached to me. Her teeth scraping my skin, as her tongue soothed the red marks trailing behind.

I got lost in the moment, allowing her gentle sucking to completely drown me. I was reawakened by water running over my body. I was in completely flux, arching against the cold tiles, against the hot water running over my naked body, against her, against her mouth, against her fingers which were pushing straight for where I wanted her the most.

I'm almost sure I'm in an orgasm debt.

I used the little control I have to flip us over, slamming her into the tiles, my body had taken the chill off but I herd her shriek just a little.

I forced her mouth open, licking her tongue, she started leaning into me. Her hands fell to my waist, one straying to cup my ass, pulling me impracticably close, I had to touch her.

I pulled back a little, giving me room to work. Naoms took full advantage and moved a hand to squeeze my tit, rolling my nipple.

"Fuck, Nai." I couldn't stop the breathless moan creeping out. She knew exactly how to provoke me and if I didn't focus I'd let her take me, fuck me until I couldn't walk. But right now I wanted to feel her come, to hear it and to see it.

I removed her hand, forcing them back to the tiles.

"Stay" I commanded. Allowing my eyes to linger over hers, I stood there perfectly still, pressing against her. She was writhing beneath me, her eyes were dark and for once I was in control.

"Em, please." It wasn't like Naomi to beg, to ask for anything sexual actually. The idea of her being vocal was such a turn on. In fact the sound of her desperate voice was making me wetter.

"What? Tell me? What do you want?" I lent closer, licking the space below her ear where her head and neck met. She was definitely panting.

"kiss me." I obliged, placing a searing kiss on her mouth. I could hear her mind working, she wanted to ask for something, I parted our lips, withdrawing them millimetres, no way a safe distance.

"I want your tongue; I want it inside of me." I felt my pussy clench, my breath caught in my throat. Fuck me that was sexier than I would have imagined.

My eyes hadn't left hers, and the smile that she was now wearing reminded my of our first time, by the lake.

Naomi tasted like nothing, she was incomparable, the first time I imagined going down on her I was curious, I wondered what she would taste like. But once my tongue brushed her clit I knew I'd be addicted for the rest of my life.

I dropped down, sucking on her right nipple on my decent, I herd the noise her head made against the wall as she let it tip back. I continued to kiss and suck at her exposed body, I think I was turning into a control freak, I could feel her frenzy, But I wanted to make her come hard.

I paused briefly letting my hot breaths fall over her clit, waiting. Her whole body stiffened.

"Emily." It was all it took, one small cry; I needed her to want me. My tongue began to work against her. She tasted mind-blowing. I teased her. Changing the pattern my mouth was making, never letting her settle into a rhythm.

I raised her leg and placed it over my shoulder, giving me the leverage to deepen my assault. I felt her body quiver and I placed a supportive hand on her hip. I have vivid recollections of struggling to stand whiles Naomi was down on me. I pushed a couple of fingers inside her. She was amazingly wet, I felt a sense of pride knowing I could do this to her. Her palm laced into my hair. I stopped, my fingers remained motionless inside, and my tongue remained still.

"Emily." She was practically screaming. I felt a little guilty, but it would be worth it. Seconds later her hands slapped back to the shower wall, she understood me. The water had turned cold but it wasn't unpleasant, in fact it was probably the only thing keeping me from erupting into embers.

The moment her limbs returned to there required destination I continued my ministrations, harder and heavier than before. It took exactly seconds before she was screaming, her hips bucking against my exhausted jaw. But I didn't stop; I slowed my pace to match the movements of her body. Once still I climbed back up her, she was trembling a little.

She didn't say anything, she didn't need to. Naomi brought our lips together, wrapping herself around me. Making the most of the heat we'd created before the cold jets forced out, back into the real world.


	12. Chapter 12

**Hello :P hope everyone had a great Christmas, anyone got any exciting new years plans? Hope ****this chapter is a good un'.**

**As always I'd love to know what you guys think, so review if you can because it really does make my day and encourage me to write.**

**As always sorry for any mistakes.**

**Laura x**

Naomi's POV

Rob, Jenna and James Fitch had moved into a nice two up two down terrace house, twenty minutes from ours. They were renting, much to Rob's continual guilt. I was surprised to hear Jenna was done blaming him, and had begun moving forward with the 'family plan'. A phrase which made me desperately irritated with that woman. Her plan probably involved straightening Emily out and pushing a rolled up rug that concealed my beaten and bloodied body into a river.

Although I had to admit that Jenna did seem to be making more of an effort with her daughters, Emily said she was more accepting of her "choices". The day that woman could actually voice the word lesbian I would probably die of shock.

I was sitting in the new Fitch Living room. Talking to Rob about my bakery job, trying to avoid James questions about boobs. Emily and Katie were helping their mum in the kitchen. They were laughing, which was nice. It made my heart swell for Emily. She missed her mum.

Effy was sitting quietly besides me, sipping on her wine and staring intently at the door, looking like a dear in headlights, like she was about to bolt.

I hadn't actually seen Jenna since my return to Bristol. Emily usually chose to come visit her mother alone, I didn't want to make it difficult for her to reconnect with her mum.

Jenna had gone part-time at the salon, and started her business part-time, which was doing well. Rob had become a personal fitness instructor. It turns out he was quite the motivator. Although I should have already known that, you don't get legs like Emily's without a half decent workout. Ahh, Emily's legs.

So the little house I was currently sitting in was quite nice, had allot of the middle class trappings of the old Fitch manor. The sofa was soft, I could have happily curled up and fallen asleep, well I could have if wasn't petrified into a bolt upright position. I felt like a child about to be scolded in school.

Katie arrived at the door, Effy had already begun to move.

"Dinner, well mum's food, is ready." She smiled at herself, Rob and James ran to the table. I got the impression it wasn't because they were hungry or looking forward to the meal presented to them, but everything was a competition. Cook would love it here. Not only would he have Jenna's undivided attention, mostly thanks to his cock; that sounded wrong, eww mental picture. But also he had the same mental age as James, and the same "curiosities".

We all filtered into the backroom. Squeezing around a table not really big enough for all. It was nice though, and I could possibly bare dinner if I got to be this close to Emz.

Unfortunately we didn't even make it past the awful soup starter before it began. To her credit she knew what she was doing; Jenna Fitch could be an interrogator for the FSB.

"So Naomi, happy to be back in Bristol?"

"Yeah, it's nice to be home." Granted I'd been back months now. I slung a sideways glance at Em, who broke out into a grin. Jesus, she was beautiful. The late afternoon sun was shining purely for Emily. It deepened her crimson hair and made her pale (hung-over) skin glow.

I sipped on my watery soup, it was green and smelt like peas, but it tasted like lemons, not real lemons though, washing up liquid lemons. I choked down as much in one mouth as I could manage without wincing.

Emily Laughed, she, Katie and James were just playing with it. Where as Effy and I had a determination to empty our bowls.

"yes, well I expect you'll be thinking about collecting your things in preparation for your second year."

"Not really, uni doesn't start until the first week of October. So plenty of time."

"Oh, that's a long break; I'll imagine you're bored."

I swallowed the urge to describe how entertaining I found their daughter. I just shrugged instead.

"Naomi's gotten herself a job." Rob piped in, thank god for Rob. I really had nothing to say to this woman.

"Really, that's nice; I know Emily and Katie are both contributing to that house of yours." Again, nothing but silence from me. Apparently If I couldn't antagonize Mrs. Fitch I had nothing to say.

"Actually Naomi's saving." Oh shit Emily you didn't just say that. Now they'll ask for what, and I'll have to tell your mother I'm not fucking off back to London. Oh and lets not forget we've not talked this through with our housemates whom are sat three inches from you.

"Really, what for?" Emily Looked so proud, It was the first time she'd really seemed overly excited that we'd be together next year.

"Train tickets." I stated it plainly. I was trying to be vague, maybe we could skirt around the issue. I hadn't seen this woman in over a year. Emily looked innocent, she had clearly had been burning to tell people about our plans.

"Where to?" I could see Jenna's mind begin to search. Pulling out one scenario after another.

"uni, next year." My eyes flicked over to Effy and Katie. I finished off the rest of my soup, trying to halt the grimace that spread over my face. They both looked a little confused. Note to self, punish Emily later.

"erm, well to be honest Emz and I have talked it over and I'm going to stay here, in Bristol." I didn't bother making eye contact with Jenna; I heard her spoon hit the bowl. I could imagine she had a countdown calendar in the kitchen, marking the day of my departure. Nobody had responded to my, well our little relvalation. Emily's hand slipped into mine. It wasn't as calming as I would have hoped.

I had wanted to talk to Katie and Effy soon; they were party to this decision. Fortunately I didn't need to have worried; they were both sporting large supportive smiles. Katie in particular looked relieved.

"Your staying, here, where are you going to live?" Of all the questions Jenna could have asked, I wouldn't have picked that as her first.

"With Emz, at our house, if that's okay with you two." Both Katie and Effy started nodding like Churchill (the dog, not the prime minister).

"defo, as long as it keeps that miserable bitch happy." Katie beamed at her sister. I audibly swallowed, fucking Jenna Fitch.

Her mouth opened and closed a couple more times before she'd decided on her next line.

"So you're going to take the train everyday, to London and back." I nodded

"We're going to be together next year." Emily finally joining the conversation.

"University is supposed to be a time of learning and growing, how are you supposed to do that when you're chained to her?" Everybody that wasn't Emily suddenly made themselves very small. Yes later Emily Fitch, you will pay.

"The old ball and chain is a metaphor mum." Now she joking, did Effy slip her something?

"To be honest Jenna, this is a decision Emily and I have made together, it's what's best for both of us." I squeezed Emily's hand.

"I don't see how you can ever be what's best for my daughter."

"MUM." Emily and Katie both screamed.

"No, Emily was doing just fine whilst she was gone, I put up with her re-appearance, but now its time for her to skulk away and let Emily get on."

"MUM, I was hardly Okay." Emily finally taking this impromptu argument seriously. Did she really think her mum had come far enough to be able to be happy for us? I should really ask Emily about last year, because that's several times now someone has mentioned Emily's state in my absence.

"and commuting really is inappropriate, how do you expect to make a real commitment to anything if your constantly traveling?" directing her attention back on me. "Well I suppose commitment isn't something people like you take seriously." People like me?

"Excuse me?" I should have left it really, not given her the opening.

"liars." Jenna hissed at me, Emily let out a strangled breath.

"Emily, that Amy girl was nice; who knows what could happen if you were given the space to flourish." That hurt more than I was expecting it to. It was me, it wasn't the gay, not anymore, it was me. It's not like I haven't had this coming.

"WHAT?" Emily shot to her feet, she let go of my hand and I missed it instantly.

"She's bad news Emily, she's fucked you up, and she will do again. She's been gone for a year; you don't know what she's done in that time. Once a cheater…"

"Enough Jen." Rob making himself a little bigger in his chair. Jenna stood up in response. She and Emily were glaring at each other. This was my fault, they were laughing in the kitchen earlier, Jenna loved her daughter, and it's not like she was wrong about me.

"Right, if everyone's finished their soup…" Jenna huffed, began picking up untouched bowls.

"Excuse me." I uttered at the room, and made my way for the door, shaking my fag packet at Em as I slipped out.

The sky had darkened, it was going to rain. Which was good, I was in no mood for bright and shiny right now.

The moment the door had closed behind me I heard Emily and Katie erupt.

You see most days, most Fitch dinners, I could have happily thrown Jenna some sarcasm, standing up for myself. Today I would very much like to be curled in a ball under my bed, Stonem style.

I perched on the front wall, it was still warm from the summer sun. The fag was nice, I took small drags, wanting to make it last. I wasn't alone for long, one fag down and Effy joined me.

"Getting a bit heated in there?" I passed her a fag.

"I always knew you we're the spawn of Satan, it's nice to have the line of argument laid down for me by a middle-aged battleaxe though." I couldn't even find that funny.

"So you're staying?"

"So you're fucking Katie Fitch?"

We smiled at each other.

"You know I used to be able to hold my head up high, people would call me a cheater and a liar and it didn't bother me. But I've cheated and I'm currently lying." Effy lowered her eyes.

"She'll talk to Emily."

"She better, because I want to be old and grey and kissing my gorgeous Emily shaped wife, I won't give her a reason to doubt me." I stood up, leaving my ledge, but I wasn't going back in there. I couldn't. Jenna was right, I was no good for Emily. Without me she could at least have one family dinner, spend sometime with the people she loved without having to climb on a soapbox or go into battle.

"Do me a favor?" Effy nodded finishing off her cigarette. "Make sure Emily gets home safe, don't want her walking alone."

"Sure, where you going?"

"Dunno, I'll see you at home."

I wasn't in the mood to go home, not yet, I needed to cheer up a bit first. I found myself following my feet, which worryingly took me straight to Uncle Keith's. Heavy raindrops started landing, lucky I'd arrived at my destination.

I grabbed myself a pint and sat down alone in the corner. I always pitied people who drank alone, I always assumed they an alcohol problem. But right now I just wanted to be. How did one woman have the ability to shake me? Last night I was so sure of us. So sure that Emily was my always.

This morning I woke up and found I have secrets to keep and this afternoon I get a 'slap in the face' reminder of how could hurt her with my deceit. Its not like I could ever forget Sophia, she was the girl I'd killed. I killed her with my drugs. And In return her memory had nearly beaten Emily and I to death.

But we'd moved on, Emily had forgiven me. That didn't matter to Jenna, I'd still be the little shit hell bent on destroying her daughters potential happiness.

I never wanted to hurt Emily, not ever again, but I couldn't control everything. She might have forgiven me, but she'd never forget it, it left a scar on her heart I could feel in every beat.

I was three pints down on an empty stomach, I was starting to feel pretty drunk. Which was when a thoroughly soaked James Cook burst into the pub.

"NAOMIKINS!" he ran over, falling on me, pushing his wet face against mine.

"Cook." I slurred, pushing him off.

"Drink? My little muff muncher."

"Please." I necked the last of my pint.

Several shots later, I was half way down my new pint, feeling amazingly sorry for myself. I kept praising Jenna.

"Really I should be happy, I mean Katie looks out for her, Jenna looks out for her, its all good." Cook just smirked in silence, letting me ramble on.

"All I seem to be capable of is making her come or making her cry." And now in my drunken stooper I was crying, tears spilling out onto Cooks already sodden shoulder.

He 'shh-ed' me. He was good at hugging was Cook. When you felt a little like falling apart, he was hard and held you together. Apparently I couldn't stop crying, Fucks sake.

After a couple of minutes, Cook pulled me up, away from him, he slid off the bench. I know I said I wanted to be left alone, but now he was gone I honestly felt worse.

Thankfully moments after his body left, he was replaced. Someone softer, someone who smelt like vanilla. I'd know her if I was blind. I didn't care how she got here, why she was dry; I was just happy to be home.

Emily pulled me close to her; I spent a few minutes calming my sobs into her neck. She ran her hands down my back, it was soothing, but not as soothing as the light kisses he placed on my forehead.

We just sat in silence as I pulled myself together.

"Sorry." I mumbled into her chest.

I heard her snort with laughter, her hand reaching down and pulling my chin up. She kissed me slowly, but she filled it with wanting. If you could say I love you in a kiss that would be how you'd do it.

"Fucks sake, look at me, Jesus." I moved my arms from around Emily, trying to wipe my eyes. Emz caught my wrists, brushed away my running mascara and placed two tiny kisses on my eyes.

Her hands cupped my face, forcing me to look directly at her. My eyes instantly fell into her.

"Better?" I nodded. "Now what is this about, because my mother might be a bitch, but you're a bigger bitch."

"It's nothing, I'm just having a fit or something." I even twitched my mouth into a small smile. Simultaneously Cook returned, bringing Effy, Katie and a full round with him.

Katie jumped in first. "It's our fault." She stated plainly.

We all looked at her, Katie took a casual sip on her vodka coke.

"Em, I've been meaning to tell you something for a while now, please don't be mad kay?" I saw Emily's eyes flicker around the group. She nodded quickly.

I felt my girl stiffen, Emily used to be an optimist. Now she assumed the worst, I done that to her. I felt my bottom lip quiver, I wanted to cry again. This wasn't missed by anyone.

"Fucks sake Campbell pull yourself together, it's embarrassing, plus I need a fucking minute where my sister is paying me attention okay?" I sucked it up, when the hell did I become such a pussy.

Everyone returned to silence.

"I'm in love with Effy."

Emily didn't say anything, her expression changed rapidly as she tried to find something appropriate to say. I was glad that anger wasn't her instant reaction.

"You love me?" Effy spoke, filling the silence.

"Yeah." Katie gazed at her girlfriend.

"I love you too." Effy smiled wildly. It suited her. Katie just snorted, took Effy's hand in hers. Emily was still yet to pass judgment.

"erm, wow, okay. So you're gay now?" Finally Emily spoke, hardly a Martin Luther moment.

"No, you're the only lezza in the family. But I do love Eff, she is my girlfriend."

"Katie I hate to point out there's not really a difference…" Effy's scowl cut me off.

"fucking hell." Cook announced from his stool. "I'm living with four women, not one of them wants to suck my cock. What the fuck is up with that."

"It might be because we've all seen your cock cook, put us of for life." Emily relaxed into me. She was taking the Effy/Katie situation well.

"Hold on, what does this have to do with Naoms crying?" She looked up at me. Katie went to speak again, but I cut her off.

"I saw them last night, I promised I'd keep quiet, and then your mum called me a liar. I was lying. I'm so sorry." I waited for her reaction. Her face flash with hurt, only for a moment, then it subsided; she pulled me back into her chest. Luckily the urge to bawl had passed. I just smiled into her neck. I need to have more faith in her, she wasn't going to fly off the handle.

"We'll call it even. As I kinda dropped you in it at lunch." She smiled sheepishly. I forgot about the impending punishment. Damn, I suppose I was a fair trade.


	13. Chapter 13

**Hey folks :)**

**Sorry about the delay, having some writers block issues because I keep changing my mind. I could really use the feedback so please review. Sorry its short, the next chapter is already underway though so shouldn't be long. Hope your all well :P thanks for reading.**

**Laura. x**

Effy POV

The moment the five of us stepped through the threshold I could tell something had changed. Mine and Katie's little revelation had changed the group dynamic. Emily couldn't really look at her sister even though she'd been supportive at the pub. Cook trotted down to the shed and I was tempted to follow him, give myself an out, the tension in the kitchen was thick.

But apparently I now had a girlfriend, I had to be there for Katie, I had to be supportive, she needed me. This was the most ridiculous idea. As a rule my whole life I've been desired, wanted. No one had really needed me. Freddie had come close, but our relationship had been too dramatic, unrealistic, and unsustainable. Katie was sincere, she looked at me and saw through the theatrics. In a glance she knew who I was. I knew right now she was terrified, she felt alone, and that would because her girlfriend was inching towards the door. At that moment, thank god for Naomi Campbell.

"Fag Eff?"

My eyes briefly flickered at Katie, I felt ashamed, why couldn't I just be strong, for once, for her. Katie didn't even look at me, she let go of my hand before I'd said anything, she knew I'd bail. Not that I'd ever given her a reason to have faith in me. Its not like I'd just admitted I loved her in front of our little world.

Once we were outside Naomi pulled out a spliff. The sun had long set and the rain had left it unseasonably cold. I wrapped my arms around myself.

Naomi and I sat in silence, passing the spliff back and forth until it was gone. I felt a little warmer.

"so…" I don't want to talk. Naomi was probably not going to let me get away with that.

"Eff?"

"What?" I bit back a bit, I sounded so bitter. It had been a good night, I think, so why did I feel so sick.

"Nothing I guess, thought you might wanna, you know, chat."

"Not particularly."

"Emily upset?" I shocked myself at how dependant I'd become. Not just on Katie, I loved our situation. The five of us here, together, happy.

"Nah, just a bit surprised, bit pissed she didn't see it coming really." I smirked; she's not the only one who didn't see Katie's admission coming. A bit of forewarning might have been nice. Her to ask for my opinion or give a crap about how I was feeling right now. Jesus, what the fuck, Katie does nothing but consider my feelings. I needed to stop being so selfish. But we'd never even really discussed what was happening between us. Suddenly she's declaring her love for me and holding my hand in public, it's a bit of a leap. One I don't know if I'm ready for.

"Eff?" Naomi nudged me. I remained silent; there was nothing I could say.

I stood up. My legs were moving, I was half way down the entry when I heard Naomi.

"it's not so scary Eff."

I didn't answer her, I didn't look back and I didn't stop.

I found myself walking toward Freddie's grave. I could hear him whisper in my mind. It was well tended, I didn't come here often, but I could imagine his dad did, and Karen. I allowed myself to flop down onto the grass. It was sodden and soaked into my clothes.

I traced Freddie's name, I wasn't sure where the stone growing in my stomach had come from. I shouldn't have come here. I had loved Freddie and his love for me had killed him, I killed him. I slammed my fist into the carved letters. If he'd never met me he'd still be alive.

My Love is possibly the worst thing that could have happened to her. I'll hurt her; it's my skill in life. I'll twist her and break her. Just like Freddie, just like Cook. I thought of Naomi and Emily, trapped in each other. Naomi clearly terrified of loosing Emily, Emily so terrified of being lost. I didn't want that. Yesterday whatever was happening between Katie and I was ours, it was fun and natural, slow maybe but it felt safe. Right now I didn't feel safe.

I felt cold, and it had nothing to do with the damp earth beneath me. I felt like a younger version of myself. I allowed my mind to wallow in the darker creases.

I though of home, Katie, Emily, Naomi and Cook. They felt more like home to me and the bricks and mortar that I grew up in. If I ruined things with Katie that's what I would loose. Emily would stand by her sister, Naomi would stand by her love, Cook would stand by Naomi and I would return to my solitary existence. Maybe that would be best. I started to cry.

I wanted her, I wanted to be with her. I wanted to be normal. How hard was normal. To just be with the woman I love? Without having a mental breakdown. Right now Kay was probably hurting, and that was all me.

Katie's POV

I watched Effy leave with Naomi. I already knew it wouldn't be long before she left. One fag, maybe two. I wished that I had under estimated her, that she'd come back in, smiling and everything would be normal.

Emz walked into the living room, I followed her, I hated the silence, I wasn't good at keeping my mouth closed.

"Em, shum, please don't be angry."

"Jesus Katie, I'm not angry, just, you know surprised. Its just a bit of a shock. After everything." She lowered herself onto the green sofa, I was tempted to join her, but still felt uncomfortable. I usually made others feel uncomfortable so standing here in a sea of nervousness was novel.

"How long?" I cautiously met her eyes. So different from mine.

"Seven months or so."

"Jesus Katie!" I looked down tracing patterns in the carpet.

"You kept this from me for seven fucking months." Her voice softened a little. It hadn't occurred to me to tell her. Effy and I had our own world which never crossed the threshold of the landing. It never left our room. We never talked about it. Until tonight, when I had literally taken the plunge and exposed us. I told Effy I loved her, what the fuck was with that. But she'd said it back.

"Sorry, I know we could be closer, but fuck kay, I'm here, I love you."

"I… it's not like that, I just, I didn't, I don't know." A few hours ago I was so sure, I loved Elizabeth Stonem, I could tell my sister and we'd have a riding into the sunset moment. Now things felt strained. Stupid impatient me I guess.

Luckily my sister took pity on me. Leaving the couch and drawing me into a hug. I found myself crying. I should be relieved and happy.

"Kay, I love you, I just want you to be happy, I don't care who makes you happy, I just wish you could have come to me."

"I'm sorry." There wasn't much else I could say to her, I was terrible when she'd told me she was gay. I hadn't supported her. Yet here she was comforting me. We would always be ok, Emily and I, all because she was a better person, softer, forgiving. How could I ever be enough for Effy.

"So no more lezza jokes" I found myself grinning into my sisters shoulder.

Before I could respond, and I assure you it would have been something bitchy but absolutely hilarious, my head snapped up in the direction of a gentle tapping on the open door. Naomi stood in the entrance, a semi supportive smile growing from the corners of her mouth.

"hey, sorry to interrupt but…" I cut her off, with a sigh.

"Effy's gone." I finished for her, withdrawing from my sister. It wasn't a question, it was inevitability. It took a couple second and a long uncomfortable silence shared between us before I snapped out of it.

"FUCKING EFFY, FUCKING STONEM!" I shot up, scaring the blonde. "I fucking love her but she can be such a cunting mong." It was eleven pm, it was dark and cold and my girlfriend was wandering the streets probably freaking out. Except I knew she wasn't wandering the streets, I knew exactly where she'd gone.

So my choices…grab a jacket and go fetch her or stay and wait till she got home. She probably wanted space, I've probably pressured her enough for one day. I said goodnight to Em and Naomi, I was half way upstairs when I heard Naomi. I was a mess of emotion and contradiction, I needed her, I wanted to help her, I also hated her, I also loved her. I wish she could talk to me, I would apologise later but she had to come back, have at least that much faith in us.

"Aren't you gonna go after her?"

I didn't answer her, I didn't look back and I didn't stop.

It was late, gone two when I heard the front door. I'd spent the last three hours awake, getting more and more worked up. Bouncing between enraged and distraught. But as I heard her feet on the stairs I was just happy she was home. I had gotten ready for bed, but had gotten re-dressed an hour so ago thinking I would go find her, before I have again changed my mind and sunk to the floor. I sat, just waiting in the dark. Effy crept in, sliding the door shut behind her. She froze when she saw me. I got up and closed the space between us, all thought disappearing into her eyes. I gently pushed her back, allowing the wooden door to support us both as I pushed my lips against hers. Fuck she was freezing.

I ran my hands over her cheeks. I'd gotten too good at soothing her, it was second nature now to protect her, I could accept a bit of an emotional battering.

"fuck, Ef, your freezing." Her teeth had begun to chatter, I should have gone after her earlier, I should have taken better care of her. This was my fault.

I lifted her dress, draping it over a corner chair. She was beautiful, stood shivering in her underwear. I took her hand, throwing back the covers and dragged her into bed.


	14. Chapter 14

**Hello. I've re-read my story, sorry for so many typos, I get a bit overexcited when I write, lol.**** I hope you don't hold it against me. Anyway, this chapter is a bit of a fluffy filler until I can get back to the story. Hope its ok. As always I'd love the reviews.**

**Laura x**

Emily POV

We hadn't slept. I felt Naomi fidget next to me, her arms never settling. Which in itself was keeping me awake, every time her skin brushed against mine, when she rolled into me, pulling me into a deeper cuddle, she set me on fire. It was ridiculous how easily she turned me on. Effy still wasn't home, Katie didn't seem to care but I knew better. Apparently so did Naomi. We both lay listening intently to Katie pacing around their room. At one point she walked out onto the landing but quickly retreated. I felt like I should talk to her, but I couldn't conjure any words of comfort. I didn't know Effy well enough to reassure my sister. That girl was a fucking mystery to most. I considered asking Naoms to go and talk to her, but I heard an angry thump from next door and thought better of it. My girlfriend and my twin didn't have the best track record, especially if Katie was pissed.

I was still reeling from Katie's declaration. I wasn't the only lesbian in the family. Mum was going to have a fit; this would of course be my entire fault as per fucking usual. But I couldn't be angry with Katie. She'd done nothing wrong, and really her admission wasn't that unexpected. I'm going to be a better sister than she was. I'm going to support her; I'll be there for her…tomorrow.

The front door opened, and quickly closed, Effy was home. I felt Naomi relax, she was asleep in seconds, which was good, she could get in a few hours before her alarm dragged her out and to work. I snuggled into Nai's warm neck and breathed her in, letting myself drift off, trying to block out any noises I heard from my sisters occupied room.

My feet were cold. Actually my legs were cold. I swear if she's stolen the fucking covers again I'll kill her. I rolled over and groaned, expecting to pull my half of the covers from my lover's twisted body, instead I found her space empty. I was completely covered but the bed was freezing. I tucked myself into a ball and reached at the note on her pillow. It had become a ritual, every morning she'd leave me a note, it was defiantly the best way to start the day, fuck corn flakes. Sometimes it was written in pen, but usually it was scrawled in eyeliner or lipstick, anything she could get her hands on at 5am. She'd started it but now we left them for each other. It ranged from _please wash my blue shirt,_ to song lyrics, I loved leaving them because It felt like I could leave a little piece of me with her.

_Morning beautiful,_

_Have a good day, I've got a surprise for you later ; )_

_Naoms _

My eyes flickered between the note and the clock, technically I had another ten minutes before I had to get up for my shift at the library. I was already very awake, my mind imagining what Nai's surprise might be, I hoped it was a naked surprise.

I rolled out of bed and padded into the bathroom. Luckily Katie hadn't risen yet; with the amount of sleep she'd gotten last night I can imagine she would be particularly bitchy today. After A quick steamy shower I returned to our room and got ready. That was the best thing about my job; I could wear whatever I wanted. Not that Naomi didn't look hot in the tight black trousers and fitted blue top they made her wear, but I was so much more comfortable in my jeans, granted I usually chose a tailored shirt and nice trousers or a skirt, but today was definitely a jeans and t-shirt day. I wrote Naomi what could be considered an essay, but I had ten whole minutes to fill. I really wish I didn't have to go to work.

Dad had repeatedly offered to give Katie and me some money to help. But I didn't want to give Mum any more ammunition; I really needed to stand up on my own. Katie often accepted hand outs, but to be fair her wages whilst being so much higher than anyone else's weren't enough to pay for her shopping addiction.

I left the house silently, I briefly considered checking on Katie, She normally started at the same time I did, but other than myself the house was still.

Work was rubbish. I crashed at lunchtime. My forty minutes off were spent asleep on the third floor. It was completely vacant so I caught a few z's. I'm sure Naomi must have crashed after work, so hopefully she'll be full of beans when I get home. My last few hours were spent moving books around, trying to fit our existing books into a new cataloguing scheme that starts next academic year. But staring at books all afternoon was exhausting, reading each letter strained my eyes and made them itch to be closed.

I followed my feet home, cursing slightly that we lived on top of a hill, I'd really run out of energy. I considered calling Naomi and asking her to walk down and drag me up, but it sounded pathetic in my head and it would only sound worse if it left my mouth. The twenty minute walk home took me thirty five in the end. I needed my bed, and the soft arms of my girlfriend. I knocked on the front door. I had keys but that involved digging in my bag to find them. Effy answered.

"Good day?" she sounded nervous, like I was about to give her a smack for walking out on Katie yesterday. I didn't have the energy, maybe later.

"Long. You?"

"Not bad." And we were done; I was already aimed at my pillow. I kicked off my shoes as I entered my quiet room. I'm an eight hour girl. I require eight hours of sleep a night, the only exception to this rule is sex. I am happy to be up all night making love to my stunning girlfriend and not sleep and survive the next day. But at any other time if I don't get my eight hours I'm dying. Naomi is the same, only she's a ten hour girl. Which is why I'm not surprised to find her face down and snoring into my pillow. My main grievance is the fact she's sprawled diagonally across the bed I'm trying to slide into. Yes people my gorgeous woman is not only a cover stealer but a bed hog. Why do I put up with this….? She begins to stir under my gaze and rolls over, she's topless, and I let out a sigh…that's why.

She's moved enough to let me in, but next to her warm naked body I feel overdressed, I slip my jeans off, trying to minimise my movements so not to further wake her.

Her eyes fluttered open. Her beautiful blue eyes, which finally rested on mine. Her mouth slowly curled into a smile, her lips begged me to kiss them. I fell quickly into her. Just soft comforting kisses. After a few minutes she pulled back and met my eyes again. It was still so light out, but our curtains cast soft orange rays over her face. I don't think I have ever been as happy as I felt in Naomi's arms right now. Life was perfect, which as usual made me feel nervous. Quietly nervous.

"Hey" her voice was velvety, barely audible but I made my chest tighten.

I placed my lips on hers again. She brought her hand up to my cheek, brushing my hair back and running fingers across the base of my neck. She was tender and loving but her touch produced a series of goose bumps across my body. I abandoned all thoughts of sleep, what a waste that would be. Naomi broke my gaze and rolled away, I felt my heart fall, just a little, I'd gotten lost in our moment.

She was gone for a second, reaching down and pulling a white envelope out of her bag. She sat up and pulled me onto her lap, instinctively I wrapped my legs around her. My breath caught in my throat, this was too close with very little clothing, my mental age was that of a thirteen year old boy. My mind settled of a repeat image of Naomi coming beneath me. She handed me the envelope and enclosed me within her arms. Moving her mouth to my jaw, placing feathery kisses along it before travelling to my neck, settling her mouth above my left ear ear. With every hot breath that touched my skin I felt my IQ dropping.

"Do you want your surprise?" thank fuck I was sitting down, because the shock that ran through me would have reduced me to a puddle on the floor. I silently nodded.

"Open it." She commanded as her lips returned to my neck, sucking gently. My head slipped back, giving her more room. I tried to control myself, bringing my body back together and concentrating on the piece of folded paper in my hands. I opened the seal, and pulled out the contents. I was first struck by Naomi's passport photo. Most people look horrendous in their passport photo, she looked dazzling. Train tickets. Naomi's train ticket. Fuck, I didn't even know she was close to having enough money, sneaky bitch.

_1/10/11-1/07/12 _it was here, just one small credit card sized pass that meant everything to me. No now I've never been happier. I don't know when Naomi had stopped running. I wanted to believe it was that night in Freddie's shed, but I think right now she'd proven it. I realised I still hadn't said one word. My insides were burning with excitement, and I couldn't control the shit-eating grin that spread along my face. Or the little dance my body started doing. I am so very cool. Naomi stopped her licking and returned to my gaze, tugging on her bottom lip with her teeth. She was beautiful, her smile was mesmerizing. I slowed my excited shuffle.

"So Emzy, what do you think?"

I spend a few seconds trying to decide whether to be sarcastic and therefore hilarious or honest and romantic. I was in far too a soppy mood to be sarcastic and an event like this should be respected.

"I think I fucking love you. I love you so much Naomi."

The next thing I know her tongue is in my mouth, pushing against mine, making me moan. Her hands fell from my back and cupped my ass, pulling my hips into hers. I momentarily saw stars; I could have passed out there and then.

"Naoms…Are…you …sure?" I spoke between kisses. She pulled back instantly. I felt vulnerable. It was a big sacrifice for her; I know her life in Uni had been extensively more exciting than my own. What if she changed her mind, wanted to move back to London when she got bored of Bristol…._bored of me_. Why can't my brain be quiet and just enjoy this moment with my sexier half. Her hand cupped my face, lifting my downwards gaze.

"Emily Fitch. I have never been more sure, or more excited about anything in my life." I'm a puddle on the floor again.

She falters slightly, I notice and naturally panic.

"If you still want me?" her question makes me release a tiny cry. How could she ask me that? I attack her with my mouth, my lips literally assaulting hers. Forcing as much passion as is physically possible into each movement. She fell backwards, I moaned unconsciously into her mouth as her hips grind into my aching centre. We needed to stop doing the verbal dance of insecurity and just trust each other.

"Always." I manage to utter before I dissolve into her.


	15. Chapter 15

**Hello. I know the ****story's gotten a bit boring, minus the smutty parts ;) but I promise I got some interesting stuff coming up, so bare with it. As always I'd love to know what you think, so review if you have a second.**

**Sorry about any mistakes, some days I'm grammatically retarded ;)**

**Laura x**

Katie POV

Monday. Fucking Monday. Fuck Monday. I called work told them I was sick. Effy Never worked Mondays. It wouldn't be a stretch to say I was pissed off. I really was, last night I'd comforted her, as per sodding usual. But I'm nobodies fucking door mat. I wouldn't pretend it hadn't happened, that she'd not freaked out and left. I heard somebody leave. It was half eight, so Emily. I crept into the bathroom, leaving Effy asleep. It was rare that I awoke before her, but today I was thankful, I needed to calm down. Any conversation right now would lead to an argument and lead to Effy fucking off again. Bringing me full circle back to my rage.

The hot water I was expecting to sooth me wasn't there. Fucking Emily! It was probably a good job she'd gone to work. I spent the next ten minutes or so trashing the bathroom, yelling about how inconsiderate my fucking twin could be. It culminated with me throwing her tooth brush out the window. I felt instantly calmer. I laughed quietly to myself, making a metal note that thanks to my habit of throwing things out of windows I owed my sister a new phone and toothbrush. I washed in a tepid shower and returned my bedroom. I did feel better. Effy was awake, hugging her knees swaddled in sheets. She was so fucking hot. Messy hair spilling down bare shoulders. Any and all angry thoughts forgotten, but I decided to get dressed; I wasn't going to cave so easily.

Hair dried, make up applied, jeans, strappy top and nice sweater, We'd not spoken in the forty minutes it had taken for me to get ready. I sat in front of the mirror, finishing my mascara, she hadn't moved. Her eyes were fixed on me. Fuck her; I'm not going to keep chasing her. Last night I told her I fucking loved her, and she ran off.

My stomach grumbled. Effy's fry up had been the last real thing I'd eaten and my body was screaming for food. The noise however had woken Effy from her trance. She moved from her nest of sheets and danced over to her wardrobe. Out came a tight black dress shirt. Don't get me wrong she looked fucking amazing. It stopped as her legs began and clung to each curve. I felt my body burn. Classic Effy attire. And be classic I mean old. This was Freddie's Effy, not mine. I could feel the resentment grow; my head was swimming in it. Why is nothing easy? My speech yesterday had scared Effy, I had known it would. This was probably my fault. I should have talked to her, but can't I be fucking reckless for once; without her regressing into a sixteen year old bitch. Right now Effy Stonem reminded me of the girl I met on my first day of college; Unreadable and illusive.

I released an angry hiss, shaking my head I made a move for the door. What was the fucking point? Always one step forward and seventeen steps back. We had been sleeping together for seven months. We had been dating, as in actually leaving the house together romantically for four fucking months. So yes yesterday I had told our friends. Its not like she didn't see it coming, she was the one who said I had to tell Emz for Naomi's sake. What the fuck had she expected? Shit I was really getting wound up.

Effy stopped me at the threshold, her hand grabbing my wrist.

"Katie." I let another huff out, my shoulders slumping; I was getting a bit sick of the issues. With Danny it was just sex. We had a laugh, yes it meant nothing to me but it was easy.

"Katie, Please. I'm sorry." This really sucks; being angry at someone is really difficult when you love them. She made me want to melt, to hold her and stroke the sadness out of her eyes.

"I know you're sorry. I just wish you didn't do this." I tugged on the hem of her dress. She looked at me confused. "I know where you went last night, I know this morning you're dressed like you want the world to be looking at your tits, you're fucking hiding. You don't do that, not with me." I was balancing in the middle of a seesaw, one end I had spiralling anger, and only other paralysing sadness. She dropped my wrist like it was on fire. I was pushing her too far. She was always so fragile. I was a bull in a china shop. But she made me furious. "why couldn't you just stay? why was it so hard to just stay with me?" I didn't get a response. I wasn't expecting one. She wanted me to drop this. To let it sink to the bottom of out relationship, it felt like a fucking anchor, keeping us stuck here, locked in the safety of our room. A little world Effy was sure of.

Effy took several steps towards the middle of the room, putting distance between us. Fuck that. I closed the distance, grabbing her arm and pushed her into the closed wardrobe doors. She grunted as her back hit the wood. Good. I held her wrists, forcing her to look at me.

"Why? Why can't you love me?" I watched as the tears began to fall. I felt so angry at her. She'd spent last night with Freddie, thinking of him when she was meant to be with me. I'm not stupid; I know she'll always love him. But for a little while I thought she could actually love me more. I was happy she was crying, the inner bitch in me revelled in it. At least she felt something.

I hate myself for hating Freddie. I love him, he's dead, and I shouldn't hate him. But his memory is possibly the biggest thing fucking with Effy. He makes her feel guilty, makes it hard for her to be with me.

She wriggled her wrist free. Her index finger following the wet trail of a tear I hadn't realised I'd shed.

"don't cry." I scoffed at her request, even though it was sincere.

"I do love you." I shook my head again. I felt so alone.

"but there's nothing I can do to make you love me more than him." anger gone, I felt a little sick. Silence. I released her other wrist.

"I love you." She repeated, I nodded as my heart broke.

The rest of the morning passed in an uncomfortable silence, Effy being painfully nice; trying to put a smile on my face. I should have just gone to work this morning. Now I was trapped in this house feeling like pure shit.

A little after midday Naomi came home, strolling straight into the kitchen.

"hey." She looked awful, that will teach her to hit the aftershocks on a work night.

"Coffee anyone?" she asked pausing over the mugs. Effy and I both accepted her offer.

"How was work?" Effy spoke, her voice breaking a little. We'd sat in silence for over an hour.

"Long and shit." She dumped a large spoon of Nescafe into each mug. She placed a mug in front of me and practically threw Effy's across the table.

"Just so you know, I'm not going to get in the middle of this shit." Her fingers flitting between the two of us, sitting side by side. "But the next time you wanna freak, don't fuck off in the middle of the night without your phone and without telling us where the fuck your going." Naomi grabbed a pack of Garibaldi's and settled opposite us, plonking a fourth cup down next to her.

I was about to ask, but a Cook stomped through the front door.

"Honey, I'm home." Fucking Cook. The three of us started smiling. I didn't feel as tense having them here, they gave me something else to think about, other than the brunette that was avoiding my eyes.

The house had been so quiet; Cook did everything loudly, even taking off his shoes. He dumped himself into the free seat next to Naomi, who instantly wrinkled her nose. I caught a whiff of him, it was pretty awful.

"Fuck off, its called hard work, pussies." He slurped on his coffee. "tip-top cuppa blondie."

"Cook." Effy addressed him. "I've been thinking. You should move into the shed." Fuck me; I think my mouth fell open. Effy loved that shed.

"wha?" Cook lent forward dropping his mug back to the table with yet another loud thud. Naomi winced again, ha, hung-over much.

"yeah, the shed, you should move into it properly, get your shit out of the living room." She finally looked at me, meeting my eyes with a smile.

"Eff…" I began, but she cut me off. Looking back at Cook.

"I don't need it anymore, and I think we're all sick of seeing your pants everywhere." She sounded so casual. This was a big deal. I'd asked Gina if we could build the shed because Ian had stopped letting us go to Freddie's shed. It made him to miserable to see us all there without him. The new shed which I'd happily furnished with some disgusting items, became an island to Effy. It was a place where she could go that took her out of the world.

Her eyes met mine again; she brought her hand up to my cheek.

"I'm not hiding. I love you." Fuck. My mouth opened and closed, Katie fucking Fitch was never speechless. A loud screech broke me out of my coma.

I looked up in time to see Cook marching out of the room. He returned seconds later his arms loaded with screwed up clothes. Dropping several socks and a pair of pants on his way, he swaggered down the garden.

"I guess he didn't need telling twice." Naomi smirked. I let myself smile. She meant it, she loved me. I sat in a happy stooper, watching Naomi move over to the fridge. I can't remember the last time I was this quiet for this long.

"Fuck, we have no food."

"its kay, Katie and I will go shop in a bit." Again the skinny bitch just sipped away at her coffee. Was I fucking dreaming? She hates shopping with me; she hates it almost as much as Naomi does. Maybe I hit her head on that wardrobe. I wasn't the only one surprised at Effy. Naomi stood wide eyed, waiting.

"Yeah its fine, you sleep, we'll go." I flicked my eyes to Effy who was calm and smiling. A normal honest smile. I nodded at Naomi, whom thanked us and retreated upstairs before Effy could take it back.

Effy POV

Okay, fear, I was afraid of a shed-less life. But she needed to know, I needed to prove to her the way I felt. Now she knows I love her more than Freddie. I could feel the joy radiate from her. It filled me with confidence, I didn't need the shed. I was never a big believer of when you smile I smile. I always thought that was clichéd bullshit. But then I fell for Katie Fitch and she taught me a few things about love.

A few hours later I found myself walking round Sainsbury's. Jesus Christ…why the fuck did I agree to this, no like a mental case I had suggested this! Two hours I've been here so far; it's a fucking food shop! Also note for the future, take a bus, Katie seemed to be on a mission to fill my mums car.

Even though I tried to hide my boredom, she noticed, she always noticed. She begrudgingly agreed to buy me a Smarties McFlurry if I put up with her a little longer. So there I am sitting in Mcdonalds, Katie is feeing me Ice cream and I'm literally in heaven. She had the most perfect lips, when she smiles and when she pouts. They're so very kissable, I swear I have to keep remembering where we are, PDA's are a definite no no. This girl had gotten me grinning like a cat, just to inform me that she had another shop she wanted to visit before we left. Jesus Christ.

A few hundred pounds lighter she'd picked Emily up a new phone. She'd spent most of her savings on it. This girl surprised me everyday in every possible way.


	16. Chapter 16

**Hello. I know I promised nothing but happy times…but I've had a truly awful week, I promise not to ruin my story ****: ) sorry its short…Next chapter will be up soon. All mistakes are mine. Review if you can.**

**Laura x**

Effy's POV

I was lying in bed, once again not having sex. Not having sex with my very sexy girlfriend. Why? Because my two complete twats of house mates won't stop yelling at each other. Naomi and Emily were having issues; apparently this meant we were all having issues. It was very off putting, it's hard to fuck Katie when you can hear Emily screaming, and it's hard to come when you can hear Naomi crying. At first my heart went out to them, trying hard to make time for each other, failing miserably, snapping at each other, falling into pointless arguments and doomed to repeat this cycle everyday. However this pity was short lived, after two weeks of constant bitching and two weeks of celibacy, fuck them, get over your pissy little problems and let the rest of us get some. Katie however was not a supporter of the 'fuck off so we can fuck' plan, she was worried about Em; her ears pricking at every raised word. She was literally ready to spring to her sister's defense, or even though she wouldn't admit it, Naomi's. She hated the conflict. I didn't like it either, It reminded me too much of home, listening to my parents arguments reverberate thought the chipped wall paper. Katie and I lay in our bed, bodies barely touching, staring at the patterned ceiling, listening to the pandemonium next door.

The crux of the problem was jealousy. Not that they even realized this, or have voiced it. But I could see it eating away. It had begun around two weeks ago; Naomi had been traveling to and from uni for the past month or so. Everything was going great. We were all tired, Nai especially because of all the travel, Em hadn't given up her library job at the end of summer so she was also pretty knackered. Then one Monday Evening Karen knocked on our front door. She was here to see Cook; apparently they had some unfinished business. Naomi had been the one to answer the door. The optimist in me wants to believe that if anybody else had greeted Karen maybe the last two weeks would have been drastically different, but the realist in me saw this coming. So Naomi in her infinitely bitchy wisdom told Karen to fuck off and shut the door in her face. Emily, Katie and I all got very angry about it, Katie and I because, well how dare she treat Freddie sister like that. Emily got pissed for a completely different reason, she was jealous of how protective Naomi was of Cook.

So I'll lay the next two weeks out for you. Naomi's problems…She never sees Emily, two ships passing in the night, she feels like she's making all the effort, Emily constantly hanging out with Amy isn't helping either.

Emily's problems…To be honest she's looking for them, she's constantly suspicious, Jealous of Cook, Jealous of Naomi's Uni friends, Jealous of the fucking train conductor. Instead of talking about it, she suppresses it, until she rages about random nonsense, like missing socks. I had to admit though; it was nice being the good, stable and supportive girlfriend for once. Every fight her sister had, Katie looked to me for comfort, it wasn't hard for me to give it to her, I didn't even consider running. Which made me quietly proud of myself, I could tell Katie was pretty surprised too. It wasn't hard to see through their tangled problems, my uncanny perception was redundant, even Cook got it. Stupid boy had tried to reason with Emily, explain to her how he saw Naomi as family. But Emily hadn't appreciated Cook sticking his nose in, and has promptly thumped him in it.

So after Karen's shock arrival things got bad. That night they had an awful fight.

"_What the fuck Naomi? Cook's a big boy he can fuck who he wants." Emily cried at Nai from the dark corner of their room._

"_I'm just looking out for him, I'd do the same for Effy, fuck it I'd do the same for Katie." Naomi screamed back._

"_No, no you wouldn't. The way you treat him… the things you do for him… it's not the same."_

"_Yes it is. Will you stop being so fucking paranoid."_

"_Its not paranoia, its not like I don't have any reason…." Emily cut herself off, but it was already too late. Naomi exploded._

"_SERIOUSLY! You're seriously going to bring Sophia up, your going to compare me trying to be a good friend to cheating, nice Emzie, nice." _

"_Please, its not like you've not been there, its not like he doesn't want you, but you just have to keep towing the line, you love his attention. You fucking love it, don't deny it."_

"_What do you want from me? It doesn't matter what I say, or what I do you won't forgive me, you don't trust me."_

"_No I don't!"_

Naomi slept on the couch that night, and the night after, in fact she'd not returned to their room in two weeks, other than to pick a fight. All thanks to Karen, who had missed Cook. This was literally the spark that set there jealously bonfire raging. Leading us straight here to this moment. When Naomi stormed out of our home, at 6am, a bag packed.


	17. Chapter 17

**Hello. Two updates in one day : ) yay for time off work! Hope you enjoy this chapter. I had to write in a bit of drama, happiness gets boring and I didn't want Katie and Effy to become the focus. I would have dragged the misery out a bit but I don't think I have it in me, lol.**

**Anyway, all mistakes are mine, I hope you guys like this chapter, review and let me no! :)**

**Laura x**

Naomi POV

The park bench I had collapsed onto wasn't stable, it was grey and old, and it creaked and wobbled. It was like a really shitty metaphor for my relationship. I placed my head in my hands and sobbed. It was still night. Although it was after six am the sun was no where near rising yet, winter had definitely taken hold. Up until recently getting up in the mornings had been a complete bitch. Lying in my warm bed, next to my warm girlfriend, in the comforting darkness, I snoozed over and over until I knew I'd probably miss my train if I didn't move. That seemed a distant memory, most mornings now; I shot off the cold sofa, into a warm shower, and out of the house, as fast as humanly possible. Hoping secretly if I went fast enough I could go back in time, to happier days. Like somehow on my bike I could reach eighty eight miles and hour and go back six months when Emily was less of a bitch. Ok I didn't mean that, she wasn't a bitch, she could be a complete cow when she was hurting though. Yet again I'd hurt her, I hurt her over and over. She cried because I had made her cry. It was similar to repeatedly hitting yourself in the head with a hammer…Every fight I said something I didn't mean, I watched them cut into her; spilling tears over clean clothes. It killed me, but it didn't stop me.

I'd walked out, I couldn't cope. She was so defeated, so was I. We had been arguing forever. I'd gotten sick of never seeing her; the whole point of me staying in Bristol was to be with Emily. But by the time I'd gotten home and eaten, she had coursework, or her library job, or visiting her friends, or a fucking party I was too tired to attend. There was always something more important than crawling into bed with me. So yes when she accused me of cheating on her with Cook I snapped, plunging myself into perpetual hell. I walked out this morning and broke the cycle. I wasn't going back to that madhouse, not until I could fix this, until I had a plan.

The bag at my feet was a joke. She probably knew it. It was full of t-shirts, her t-shirts at that. I'd opened the draw closest to me and emptied it into a rucksack. I don't even know why I'd done it, to make a point I guess. She needed to forgive me; I'm not spending the rest of my life on probation.

I'd been sitting on the bench for about an hour; I noticed it getting continually brighter. I'd stopped crying, I just sat trying to figure out my next move. Fuck uni today. This was going to be the first day of the rest of my life, which meant Emily. I stared at a flower arrangement within a display in the park. Everything was dull in this light, I missed summer. I was so absorbed in the petals I didn't notice a woman stop in front on me.

"Hello Naomi." The voice cut through me, shit…Jenna Fitch.

I snapped up to her, my mouth hanging open. Of course the sun had only started to rise and it was all ready the worst fucking day of my life, why not throw in another Fitch fight. Any minute now Katie is gonna come screaming round the corner with a leopard print chainsaw.

"Hello Jenna." I tried to remove the croak from my voice. I gently pushed the bag with my foot, trying to hide it under the bench. Why? Seriously, if there is a god, why? I tried to casually wipe my puffy eyes.

"You're up early. Off to university?"

"Err…yes" I stuttered, I didn't want to lie to Jenna. She'd only hold it against me later, but what else could I have said.

"I didn't know you jogged." I stated plainly, trying to make conversation with the woman that hated me. I'd looked her over, jogging bottoms, trainers, a 'Fitch fitness' hoody. Definitely jogging. Just like Katie, Jenna Fitch wouldn't have normally dared to leave the house dressed this way. She moved to sit beside me.

"Well, no free private gym membership anymore…" I smirked slightly; she was as uncomfortable as I was. "how's Emily?"

"Fine." I replied on instinct. I wasn't going to turn around and say 'well, Jenna dearest, if you must know, I'm slowly breaking her; she's probably at home, crying again, yes again!'

"Good, I've not really seen either of them since that Sunday." I heard the regret in her voice. For once she wasn't making a song and dance of hiding it. "I owe you an apology…For my behaviour."

My mouth swung open again. I had no clue what to say.

"S'Fine." I whispered, hoping she'd drop the uncomfortable topic. I don't think I could handle her kindness, not when I deserved her wrath, it made the guilt a little too much to bear. Thankfully Jenna, rose. Stretching her arms.

"We're having dinner, Saturday. For their birthday, you should come. They'd like that." I shy smile plucked the corners of Jenna's mouth, I had to take this opportunity to extend the olive branch.

"So would I. Thank You Naomi." I nodded, trying not to grin like a monkeys uncle. Jenna was being nice to me.

"Six, at ours?" Jenna nodded, and started to walk off. She stopped abruptly, half turning back towards me.

"Everybody fights Naomi." And she quickly broke into a run; Once again my jaw hit the floor. Most shocking of all, Jenna Fitch had given me an idea on how to repair me and Emz. It was just a bunch of stupid fights. Fucking hell we are twenty now, its time to grow up. I picked my rucksack up, slinging it over my shoulder as I bolted home.

I flung the door open a little after seven thirty, my lungs burning, fucking hill. I lent into the Kitchen. Three tired looking bodies hunched over steaming mugs, Emily Katie and Effy's eyes all touched mine as I ran up stairs. I emptied the rucksack, and re-filled it with a few essentials. Running straight back down stairs seconds later. Emily met me at the stairs. I avoided her eye contact, I was on a mission. I stormed into the kitchen, addressing Effy directly.

"Keys." I panted.

It took a moment for her to understand, her eyes flicking between mine in Katie's, I didn't have time for this.

"Fucking car keys Stonem!" She pointed towards the kitchen counter, and I swiped the fob instantly. I turned back towards the silent hall. Emily's eyes were full of unshed tears, her lip trembling. Jesus.

"Did you forget something…socks." She started to cry. I moved forward, placing my hand on her hot cheek, brushing away fallen tears.

"Yes, I forgot the most important thing." I interlinked our hands and quickly dragged her towards the door.

The car journey was spent in silence, we didn't have far to go. Her nervous glances told me she recognised our path. She'd fortunately grabbed herself some shoes as we exited, she was still wearing her jeans from last night, but now she was wearing my Goldsmiths hoody. I'm gonna take that as a good sign. I parked up, pulling the bag from the backseat.

"Naoms…" She trembled; taking in her surroundings. I didn't answer her, I just got out. I had brought her to the lake. It was important, it was important to us. If one place could symbolise my falling hopelessly for Emz, this would be it.

She slowly exited the car, I walked round and met her, and taking her hand in mine I dragged her down a familiar path until we touched the waters edge.

I turned and faced her. Her expression was unreadable, that in itself was scary. So our problems, they were fixable, we just needed to talk to each other, not scream. 'Everybody fight's', But eventually you have to stop fighting and deal. I'm in a 24/7 relationship, its time to mature. Ironically, I came to mature in the same place Emily and I had come to behave immaturely.

"Naomi, why are we here?" We faced each other on the stone edge. The water rippling gently in the cold breeze.

"I love you. You know I love you. I know you love me. So can we please stop now."

"Naomi, it's not that simple…" I cut her off.

"Yes it is…watch."

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry I resented your library job, I know you love it and I'll try to remember that." I removed my jumper. The cold hit me and I shivered, but it was a happy shiver. Her mouth opened and closed, clearly thinking I'd gone a bit mental. Maybe I had.

"And I'm sorry that I'm jealous of Amy, I trust you." I slid my jeans off. Finally she looked like she was catching on.

"I'm Sorry…I'm sorry that I said I didn't trust you. I do trust you, but sometimes when he looks at you…"

"No buts" I add to her revelation letting my smile grow. I moved closer towards her, pulling my hoody over her head, discarding it with the pile of my clothes.

"I'm sorry I get possessive, and then bitchy." Removing my t-shirt. Her eyes flickered down over my bra clad chest, I watched her cheeks redden, and felt mine do the same.

"I'm sorry I can be selfish." A sadness striking her eyes I don't like.

"I'm selfish." I fire back. I stepped closer, pushing us together slightly. As desperate as I was to make thinks right, my body was burning under her hands, which currently were holding onto my hips. I moved my hand between us and fumbled at the button keeping her jeans up. She stepped out as they slid down. I'd missed her. "I'm sorry I've not been there." She held her hands above her head before she'd even finished. Her gorgeous soft brown eyes stroked my blue ones. I like making up, it was like falling in love all over again.

We kicked our converse off, her arms moving around my neck.

"I'm sorry I dragged Sophia up. I don't know why I did it. I promise I've forgiven you."

"It's okay if you haven't Em, I'll never really forgive myself." An uncomfortable silence descended between us.

"I thought you brought me here to break up with me." She hummed quietly into my neck.

"You're my everything. I've been a twat for weeks. We never talked about how this might work; Living together. We just assumed it would be as easy as summer. But I'll do anything. You're the only person I'm ever going to want, you're the only person I every want to do this to me." I moved her hand over my heart, which was hammering. Emily lowered her eyes to her hand; her grin grew with every beat.

I had to hand it to Jenna Fitch, I'd gotten too caught up in my misery, it wasn't the end, and it never would be. We wouldn't let it get that bad again. Another autumnal wind blew across the lake, it was freezing. We both giggled, trembling into each other. She melted a little more into me, the wind blowing any trace of tension away.

"Did you want to swim?" I snorted at her suggestion.

"Yeah, sure, you first." I nodded towards the icy water. Her laugh was beautiful, husky and sweet. It had been too long since I'd heard it. "on second thoughts…I'd rather my beautiful redhead didn't get hypothermia. As much as a loath the suggestion, we should probably put our clothes back on." I pulled my arms tighter around her, shielding her from the increasing wind. Emily's laughter rippled through my shoulder.

"Then what was the point of taking them off?"

"Mostly I was just thinking about how to get you naked." I received a swift jab in the ribs. What the hell had we been playing at?

We both quickly re-dressed. I pulled a blanket out of my rucksack. Our legs hanging over the edge perilously close to the waters surface. The blanket wrapped tightly around us both.

"So, tell me honestly, what has to change? I mean it Em, I'll do anything."

She hesitates for too long, trying to make her request sound better no doubt; I can guess what it might be.

"Cook. I'm not gonna ask you to stop seeing him or anything. I just need you to understand how I feel. It might be irrational, but it bothers me."

"I promise I'll put you first. And try and consider you more when it comes to spending time with him. Is that enough?" she nods, she doesn't look entirely happy, but I'll leave it for now.

"So, tell me honestly, what has to change? I mean it Naomi, I'll do anything." I smile and nudge her shoulder.

"Cut down your hours at the library. I'm not asking you to quit, but I need more of you than just bedtime." I was very matter of fact. I think it took her by surprise, but fuck it; I'm a woman who knows what she wants.

She nodded, interlinking our fingers, it felt like a promise.

I twisted my body within the itchy blanket, using my free hand to pull her face towards mine. It was the first kiss I'd has in weeks. I'd almost forgotten how good she tasted.

Emily POV

I threaded my hands through her hair. She smelt amazing, she tasted amazing. The last two weeks have been hell. I'd been seeing her for five minutes a day; those five minutes were spent throwing insults and insecurities at each other. I started avoiding being at home.

Right now all was forgotten, she'd seemingly forgiven all the awful things I'd said to her; good because I hadn't meant most of them. As she sucked on my tongue I felt a familiar ache between my legs. I have to say yes screaming at each other was unpleasant but she was so fucking hot when she was angry. If I hadn't been so upset we would have had very awesome angry sex.

I felt myself begin to get swept away, my hands tugging on her neck for more contact. The second my mouth found her neck she pushed me away. I couldn't help the feeling of rejection that washed over me.

"sorry." I mumbled, my head instantly falling, I was stupid to think all could be forgiven and forgotten in one conversation. I'd been too big a bitch.

"Don't be stupid." She lifted my chin, she was smiling. "But it's cold, and as much as I want you right now, I'd rather have you naked in a warm bed."


	18. Chapter 18

**Hello! Sorry ****it's been a while since I updated, I hope you guys still wanna read it. I've re-written this chapter too many times, lol, so I've settled on smut. lol.**

**Basically I've written it, read it and thought what hell upload it. So any mistakes are mine. Please review, I would appreciate the feed back.**

**Enjoy.**

**Laura x**

Effy POV

Everybody leaves. Eventually they all drip away. I watched Naomi tow Emily out of our home. I saw the crack grow between them long before today; I had seen it since its existence. It was my curse, doomed to see a little clearer than everybody else, which was ironic considering I was less than sane. I silently begged for the blond to make it right. And she and Emily would stroll home, without a care in the world; they would get back to their contented relationship, have lots of sex and making the rest of us ill with their devotion.

I hated knowing better, I hated knowing that no matter what was said, no matter how hard Naomi tried, Emily was too broken. She didn't trust anybody, she didn't trust me, Katie, her parents, we had all let her down, stomping all over her innocence, hardening her to the world. She wasn't the girl Naomi fell in love with, Naomi was starting to understand this fact.

Katie moved from her seat beside me, the kitchen silent now we sat alone. She slid over my lap, straddling me. The contact was nice; her skin stopped my mind from spiraling. She was still wearing her pajamas, she pulled my head into her chest, instinctively I drew in a deep breath, her sleep wear was coated in her sweet scent, it flooded my head and calmed my anxiety. I saw the cracks in Katie. Katie like Emily didn't trust me. I was trying to prove myself to her, but really there wasn't anything I could do. The Fitch Twins were just used too being let down.

"I love you." I mumbled into her warm chest.

"I love you." She whispered confidently. We weren't at breaking point, not like Nai and Em, but I knew one day we would be. Nothing's ever perfect. Katie seemed relieved, she was hopeful, she was confident Naomi would comfort her sister and their love would return whole again. Ignorance is bliss.

Her fingers stretched into my hair, grasping at my head, bringing my lips to hers. I felt comforted. Her full soft lips touched mine, quelling thoughts of doomed love. I forced down my negativity, pushing it away from the fringes of my mind and focus my attention on the beautiful purple haired girl grinding into my body. I brought my hands from my sides and placed them on the small of her back, pulling her closer. It had been too long since she's touched me like this, I hadn't said anything, I know her mind had been consumed by concern for her sister, but fuck it felt good to touch her. Katie was literally burning above me; I clearly hadn't been the only one repressing my desires.

Her hand pushed underneath the baggy tee I'd been wearing, it was swept off me in an instant, the cool air of the kitchen barely making a mark as her hands blazed a trail down my back. Our movements became increasingly frantic, Katie's hands massaging my tits with force, the pressure was electrifying, I drew my nails down her thigh and she moaned into my mouth. I wanted to fuck her, I was going to fuck her, I wanted to be inside of her when she came. I flicked my hands back up, over her hips and under her tank top, pulling it up as I racked her skin. The moment the flimsy material left her body I wrapped my arms around her and pulled us together, I gasped as her breasts touched mine. I pulled back, staring into her chocolate eyes, they were dark, her actions told me how much she wanted me, and her eyes screamed how much she needed me. Our lips crashed together, her tongue attacking mine; I shifted her slightly, moving her to one side so I could rub my thigh against her aching core. Even though her shorts I could feel how hot and wet she'd become, I felt my pussy clench and flood. Once Katie felt the contact between us, she began to rock, creating more friction, allowing her cum to sock through the delicate material I was now desperate to remove.

I bit her lower lip, sucking it between my teeth, I felt Katie respond, gripping my neck with her nails, It hurt, but I loved making her this desperate.

"Fuck Eff," She cried out the moment my teeth grazed her neck, I began nipping and sucking at her skin, lowering my lips until I was close enough to draw in her hardened nipple. I feverishly ran my tongue over the rigid peak and listen to the illicit cries coming from my hot girl. As I moved my mouth over to repeat my sensual actions on Katie's other tit I realised I could hear her heart thudding. It was such an exciting sound; I paused briefly to listen to it. Katie however misread my curiosity for hesitation and withdrew slightly, clearly feeling a little self conscious.

Her hands dropped from my skin and she shuffled backwards, putting space between our aching, sweating bodies. I wasn't having any of it. Katie has never been shy about sex. Not before me, nor with me. But her confidence was her mask to the world, hiding her insecurities, it really didn't take allot for me to hurt her, not now she'd let me love her.

"You're beautiful Katie." I slid forward, trapping Katie between my yearning body and the solid wood of the table.

Her eyes flickered around. For a woman so sure of how fit she was, she got incredible shy about being told she was in fact beautiful. I was cute; it was something only I knew about her. I threaded my hands into her messy sex hair and forced her eyes to settle. Her lips were deep pink and swollen. It took seconds for her to soften and melt back into me, I smiled into her, she was mine, She loved me, who gives a fuck if love and life weren't perfect, because right now with my girl arching into me, things felt pretty wonderful.

Katie POV

Yes I was worried about Emily, I don't mean to be a callous bitch but all I can think of, right now is what Effy Stonem looks like when she cums. Naomi would fix it, this morning Emily had been my problem because I thought Naomi had abandoned her, no Naomi had just done the dramatic girlfriend bit, now she'd swept Emily away, and they'd fix it, like normal, they'd be happy again. So Naomi can deal with emotional Emily; leaving me free to deal with the fit brunette whose fingers were tracing a pattern up my inner thigh in the kitchen.

I could go without sex, I'm not a fucking nympho or something, but I'd missed sex. Stupid lezzer bitches, couldn't they just control there hormonal shit. I couldn't handle all the women in my life taking mental turns to be 'little miss crackers', it wasn't conducive.

Effy stopped kissing me; I instantly missed her intuitive lips, but was grateful for the chance to breathe. However, the brunette pushed herself back and allowed me to slide off her lap as she stood up. I missed her, her leg had done a damn good job of getting me started, she could come back her and finish me off, the cheeky bitch. I began to protest, grasping at her skinny body wanting to hold it against my own to combat the raging fire between my legs. Effy silenced me with one finger, her middle finger to be precise, which slipped beneath the waistband of my pyjama shorts and through my wet folds, nearly buckling my legs, I lent back against the table, silently praying for her hand to continue.

"I want you Katie." I choked on my own breath, finally releasing a tense pant. "I guess the question is…how much do you want me?" I saw the smirk and the dirty glint in her eye, Elizabeth Stonem loved to play. She took off towards the stairs, by the time I felt confident I could control my legs she was already half way towards her destination, presumably our bedroom. Apparently we we're all skiving uni today. I chased after her, trying to look sexy. Difficult when you're half naked and running upstairs, fucking Stonem, I swear it turned her on seeing me looking like shit.

All the bedroom doors were shut, the hall was dark, I couldn't help the grin or the giggle. Before Effy, sex with guys had been all about them, them getting off and me getting the occasional release. I didn't know any better. Effy was different, she was teaching me more and more about my own body every time.

I paused at our bedroom door, my ears craning at the wood. I could hear small little cries of pleasure. I ripped the door open, revealing my delicious girlfriend, on our bed, her hand pumping between her legs. I could see her pussy glistening. My previously rushed actions had slowed to a stop. I'd become paralysed as I watched her fingers disappear into her; she was staring at me, moaning my name. It was literally the hottest thing I'd ever seen. My body was screaming for her, and when the fuck did it not get what I wanted. Two years ago if you told me I'd be getting wet at the thought of fucking Effy Stonem I would have probably slapped you.

I honestly have no clue how I did it, but I found myself walking slowly over to our bed. Effy's fingers never stopped moving, they didn't slow there efforts. Good. I wanted to crush myself against her; I wanted my fingers to be the ones working inside of her building her orgasm. Instead I lowered my self onto her, leaving her plenty of room to continue touching herself. Her hand brushed against my clit and it crumbled my resolve, I allowed my body to fall, attaching her neck and jaw with my tongue. Licking a path to her ear and back again. I brushed the brown hairs sticking to her face off, she was glowing, and every inch of her begged me to kiss it. My hand quickly ran down the rest of her body, I relieve her, replacing her wet fingers with two of my own. Her freed hand came straight up to my face and I didn't think twice about licking them clean. She tasted so good and the thought that she wanted me to savour her made me wet all over again. The cries and moans leaving my lovers mouth were getting louder; I felt her pussy tighten around my thrusting fingers letting me know how close she was.

"Katie, Fuck…Jesus Kay…I'm…" I added another finger; it pushed her over the edge. Fuck Stonem you're sexy. I kissed her until her body stopped shaking and slipped my fingers out, she quivered, still so sensitive. I wiped them on my shorts, they were soaked through anyway. I began to stare at my peaceful brunette, her eyes closed, and her chest still not rising to rhythmic breaths. In the winter sunlight she looked stunning, her pale skin glowing. I rolled slightly finding cool sheets. They were slightly shocking after the heat Effy and I had built. After a few minutes of quietly holding her and playing with tangled strands of her hair, she rolled over and looked at me.

I could tell she was thinking something important over, Effy had three readable states. The 'mischievous smirk', my personal favourite. The 'wide eyed mental' look, a psychological state that I worked hard to keep at bay. Then the 'occupied stare'. During these times you could be a brick wall, Effy was contemplating something, mulling something over in her mind. Whether these thought ever formulated into a conversation was anybody's guess. Right now she had that look. I didn't let it bother me, if she wanted to talk she'd talk, she knew I'd listen and that was all that mattered.

We were broken from our moment by the front door. Too early for Cook, Emily was home, hopefully with Naomi, Hopefully with her girlfriend Naomi, hopefully happy.

"Their home." Effy stated, her eyes settling back to 'mischievous smirk'

"no shit. I thought you were meant to be psychic Stonem." I gave her shoulder a nudge and pulled myself closer, enjoying the lingering heat from her body.

"Shame, I was quite enjoying having the house to ourselves." The smirk grew, horny bitch.

"I could tell."

"I was hoping to walk you through the merits of an empty house." I rolled back under her silent instruction and she topped me. "Instead I guess it will have to be a demonstration of the erotic power held in the possibility of getting caught."

"wordy." I giggled

"yeah, I think I'll shorten it to…can Katie cum quietly?"

"catchy."


	19. Chapter 19

**Hello :) Thanks for all the reviews folks. I know I've been all over the shop with this story, but its my first one and I've been having a bit of a play! Lol. I've got some idea for my next one but I really want to finish this one before I start another. I hope this chapter is ok. I figure I'll to six chapters or so more and find a way of pulling it all together.**** (Although I change my mind allot lol )**

**Anyway, as always mistakes are mine. I'd love to know what you think so please review, it makes my day.**

**Much love.**

**Laura x**

Naomi POV

Emily is my future. When I look forward ten years, twenty, fifty all I see is red. All I want is red. I want to wake up every morning holding her. Raise two point five children and die old and grey in each others arms. But we had to get there first. I'd loved her since I was twelve; I wanted to love her long past the age where I remembered my own name. At the lake I realized how much she'd changed. I was chasing her. I'd stopped running, now it was her turn to be afraid and flee. It hurt a little, but not enough to convince me not to chase her with every inch of strength I possessed.

The things I'd put her though, It's a bout fucking time I stepped up, fixed the mess I made. Maybe that's why Jenna and I were getting on, I no longer contradicted the fact I have and would fuck her daughter up. But now instead of begging me to stay away, she was ok with me trying to make amends.

So here I stood, the picture of domestic bliss, stirring a saucepan containing Emily and Katie's birthday meal. I'd been demoted to 'stirrer' by Effy, who was a surprisingly good cook, and head chef Eff was getting continually pissed off with my cooking incompetence. I hate to say it, but Effy Stonem was fucking hot when she got bossy. She'd already banned Katie from the kitchen for interfering. At the time Katie's fowl language had provided an adequate incite into her feeling on this matter but the darkening of her pupils contradicted her.

Emily broke into the kitchen, huffing, her arms slid around me as she laid her head on my back.

"You alright baby?" I hummed never leaving my stirring duties.

"Yeah, you'd think we were entertaining the fucking queen. Katie's got me polishing cutlery on my birthday." Emily couldn't hide the snort of laughter. "so…what we having?" Emily moved ducking underneath my waiting arm and staring inquisitively into my pot.

"I'm making gravy, well Effy made gravy; I'm just keeping it warm."

"It's the only job I could give her that she wouldn't fuck up." Effy chuckled whist moving around the kitchen doing a thousand jobs at once, cool as a cucumber, by when was Effy anything but.

The doorbell rang; Emily began to move, just in time to see Katie tearing through the hall. She was so excitable; I can only imagine what she must have been like at Christmas as a five year old. This morning, just as I'd finished giving Emily her second 'special' present Katie was banging on our door.

"_Emily…Emily for fuck sake I know your up, you two make enough fucking noise.!" Emily gave me a quick kiss before acknowledging her sister._

"_Keep your knickers on." She hissed at her sister. I pulled some clothes on, grumbling as Emily covered up, and let her sister in. Katie jumped into our room, she reminded me of an excitable puppy. I desperately wanted to make a bitch pun, but my sex clouded brain wouldn't work fast enough._

"_Happy Birthday Emsie." _

"_Happy Birthday Katie." Emily's hug barely slowing Katie's springing._

_Effy stood in our door way, I walked around the excitable duo, her look matched mine._

"_Nice hair." Glowed familiar smirk I'd come to love._

"_You too." We both looked towards our better halves and laughed._

_The warm blush on both faces deepening identically._

My mum had arrived for dinner. I'm not really sure why we'd invited the old hippy and her boyfriend, but Emily said Sunday dinner was family dinner, so she'd invited Gina and Andrea. A grand total of ten; ten people around our table in the living room would be a stretch. But Emily wouldn't have it any other way, Katie unfortunately was having kittens trying to accommodate that many dinner guests and decorate the table accordingly. Gina drew Katie into a very motherly hug, more of a compassionate hug than I'd shared with her in years. It was humbling to watch. For years it had been just me and mum, now we had this massive family. Kieran blew past Katie, nodded at Emily wishing her a 'fucking great birthday' before moving straight for the kitchen, beckoning me outside. Effy encouraged me to leave, looking relieved as I dropped my wooden spoon.

"I need a fag." Kieran demanded the moment the door was pulled to.

"Well hello to you to." I crossed my arms over my chest, chucking him a glare my seventeen year old self would be proud of.

"Don't get pissy, you mum's making me quit," I couldn't not laugh at how pathetic he looked. "Stop fucking laughing and give me a fucking fag."

I dug my fags out of my pocket, handing him one and taking one for myself.

He took two long drags, before calming down and addressing me again.

"thank fuck for that, that woman will be the death of me."

"says the man clutching the cancer stick."

"don't talk like that around your mother, fucking crazy woman is on a mission to rid the world of cigarettes, she'll be on at you before dinners over."

"Why don't you just tell her to fuck off?"

"Because she'd eat me for breakfast, you think you're the only fierce Campbell? She's a fucking dragon when she gets stuck into something."

"Fair enough."

"How's university? I read through your essay on European politics, fucking great stuff."

"yeah, pretty great actually, I got a first for that essay."

"To right, given any thought to what you want to do after?"

"A little, Emily still wants to travel, so I'd like to do that. But I'm hoping to come home and do my masters after."

"Wow, fucking masters, that's impressive, so it is." I found myself smiling, I'd never known my dad, I guess it didn't really bother me anymore, but Kieran was nice. I mean yes he had tried to snog me and he could be a royal wanker, but right now he looked kinda proud. He pulled the last dregs of nicotine through his filter.

"Right, best return before your mum notices I'm gone."

"You think she's not already?"

"No, I'll imagine she'll be too busy doting over your missus."

I laughed whist flicking my fag into the bucket by the backdoor.

I re-entered the kitchen to see my mother releasing Emz. Emily's cheeks were rosy; clearly a little embarrassed by the amount of attention Gina was devoting. Yes Emsie Fitch had changed allot since out college days, but she still wasn't comfortable being the centre of positive attention.

My mother's eyes instantly flicked between the backdoor and my old politics teacher. Emily moved to my side, unfortunately giving Gina a clear path to the shamed Irishman. He got a good clip round the ear before she turned addressing us both.

"Enough! I want your fags!" Never, not once has my mother yelled at me to reprimand my behaviour but if I stood as an apposing argument she could happily beat me to death.

"Smoked them all." I lied, badly.

"I did not go through fourteen hours of labour so you could choke yourself!"

I was instantly happy she's chosen those precise words. 'Kill yourself' would have gone down like a lead weight, and I really didn't want Emily thinking about Sophia, not now on her birthday, not ever. Effy caught my gaze; I could tell she was thinking along similar lines. I tried not to acknowledge her concerns with my eyes, but I failed. Eff turned back towards the oven, casually rubbing her scared wrist, avoiding Katie's eyes.

"Naomi!" My mother screamed. "Fags!" She shook her palm at me, fuck it, there was only one left, I'm sure I could bum one of Eff. I slapped the light packet into her palm. Without another thought, she drowned the innocent bundle in the soapy dish water. Other than the sniggers going round the room all that could be heard above my mother's smugness was Kieran's whimpers.

"Right, Fuck off." Effy sighed. "Seriously fuck off out my kitchen." The sniggers increased, Katie's being the most audible. People piled out. "You too Naoms, your doing my fucking tits in." I shrugged. I'd spent all summer cooking dinners for this unappreciative bunch. Now Chef Eff deemed me shit.

The doorbell chimed again, I moved to answer it, narrowly beating Katie.

Jenna, Rob and James Fitch stood at the threshold.

"Hey Naomi….you know they say your skin is your largest organ…Not in my case." The little shit even winked at me. I had to admire his guts, hitting on me before hello, in witness of the majority of his family.

"Hi James, go fumigate yourself and you can come in." He pushed straight past me into the waiting arms of his sisters; it was sweet actually.

"Naomi." I took an involuntary deep breath, expecting something from the woman I once called my nemesis. But nothing followed it, well nothing but a polite smile, she moved towards her children; leaving me to welcome her well muscled husband. Rob drew my into a famous Fitch hug. Apart from making me feel a tad uncomfortable, it was nice. I almost felt accepted by the whole Fitch clan.

Once the twins had been toughly hugged by both parents and birthday wishes exchanged, we all moved into the lounge come dinning room. I then had the joyous task of introducing my freaky mother to the suburban duo. Once the civil introductions were exchanged, I had to dive in with offers of drinks, cutting Katie's desperate need to play hostess off at the core, Its her fucking birthday, I would have thought she'd want to be waited on. Anthea arrived as Effy ordered everyone around the table and I helped her carry Dinner in. Roast with all the trimmings, It was immense. My appreciation for Effy's previously hidden cooking talent was shared by the group in collective enthusiastic noises.

"Babes, this tastes amazing."

"Yeah Eff, Thanks, it's really good." Katie and Emily were the first to voice their approval at the effort the brunette had gone to. Effy's pale cheeks reddened, she tried not to look too happy receiving so many complements.

"Naomi helped." She announced. I scoffed, cutting off Jenna's sentence. Yes Jenna was about to probably pay me my very first complement and I silenced her.

"I really did nothing but get in the way, this is all Eff's doing."

"Really? When did you learn to cook love?" Anthea beamed from her seat next to Kieran.

"Summer, worked in a restaurant for a bit." Effy replied quietly.

"Really is brill love. I WISH I could eat like this everyday." Rob winked at the bashful brunette "I'd be the size of a block of flats mind you; you feed us like champions babe." Quickly changing tact; noticing the scathing look from Jenna. Myself, Emz, Eff, Katie and James all broke out laughing. Surprisingly Jenna let herself smile; It was the most relaxed I'd ever seen her. The conversation passed easily, all parents contributing freely. This was a huge pain in the arse, thanks to my outspoken mother.

"I just think it's a horrible, dangerous, expensive addiction. Makes you stink."

"I couldn't agree more, I'm so happy my girls have never smoked." Rob pointed at Katie and Emily, both of whom refused to meet his gaze.

"Exactly, Naomi and I have had a word and she's going to quit." Fucking hell woman.

"Actually you drowned my cigarettes, I'm not quitting just because you say so." I tried to keep my tone friendly, but I could see my mother winding up for an argument. I looked to a sheepish Kieran for a little assistance. He just shrugged, finishing of his mountain of mash.

"You can smoke if you want Naoms." Emily Giggled, trying to take my side. Then something remarkable happened. Actually if you had the top ten moments of mine and Emily's relationship, this would be up there.

"Well Emily I can't imagine you enjoy kissing an ashtray, I had this boyfriend who smoked before I met your father, eugh, he tasted like old socks." I noticed Emily's mouth fall open, I realized I was mirroring her shock and the shock of her twin, and the shock of her twins girlfriend, in fact the shock of nearly everyone round the dinner table. Jenna Fitch just admitted that Emily kissed girls, me specifically, it was a completely innocent comment, second nature, something _my_ mother might say. The funny just kept coming,

"I mean she's your girlfriend you should want her to stop." Her tone was surprisingly friendly; she ate her remaining carrots in the now silent living room. I coughed, knocking everyone out of there shocked stupor.

"Yeah, I guess you have a point mum." I was sat to my excitable redhead's right, her head whipped round at me so fast it could have span off. She was glowing, her smile was infectious, Jenna had given her the best birthday present, acceptance. So what do I do, agree to quit, or argue and risk ruining the mood? Fuck that, I'm not doing either. Under nine glaring pairs of eyes, I stood up.

"Cake?" I announced to the room. Effy joined me and together we cleared the table, leaving our girlfriends and our families to chatter.

Once all the plates were arranged by the sink and the table was relatively tidy, I went to retrieve one of the two cakes, I had successfully baked today. The white one, a very appropriate 21st birthday cake, the other an MDMA laced chocolate cake; definitely in reserve for birthday shenanigans later.

So after a chorus of happy birthday to you, the exchange of gifts and the consumption of a small slice of very nice birthday cake, we we're all ready to bit farewell to the family.

Jenna left, thanking both me and Effy for our efforts; she even went in for an awkward one armed hug. I swear I gave her a slice of the drug free cake. I slipped Kieran a slice of our 'special' cake on their way out, bidding my mother goodbye. Anthea pulled me into a quick hug before she left. Thankfully the four of us were finally left alone. Our eyes flicking between the closed front door and each other. A few seconds past and we all erupted into laughter. I think that might have been one of the best Sunday dinner I have ever had.


	20. Chapter 20

**Hey, sooooo sorry for the mammoth wait between uploads. I'm hoping I'm re motivated with this story. Forgive me?**

**Anyway, all mistakes are mine**** as always…hope you enjoy it; it's a bit of a filler I know. Much love all, review and motivate me pretty please.**

**Laura x**

Last night I'd gotten laid.

It was a 'congratulations on completing your European politics revision'. The problem being Emily's fingers had knocked all relevant exam points out of my head. Now all that swam around in my mind was the sight of Emily coming…on repeat…very distracting. I'm going to fail.

So here I sat in my exam hall…surrounded by forty other politics students preparing to take our last January exam. Emily took her last yesterday and feeling rather pleased with herself had decided I deserved some of her attention. I have to admit the last couple of weeks had been a nightmare. All four of us at home had exams; we were all on edge, all taking it out on each other. Katie had completely taken the living room now as her own personal design studio, pissing me in particular off. I couldn't go to my room because Emily was working, I couldn't go into their room because Effy was working, I couldn't go to the shed because Cook was shagging, I couldn't fit into the living room with all the crap in there. Plus if I even tried Katie went mental…

"Don't infect this space with your shitty fashion sense lezza." To which I responded…

"This is my fucking house!"

"Well it's my fucking house to…I pay fucking rent…so get the fuck out babes."

So I was now left with the kitchen or the fucking hall. So yes I was looking forward to the end of exam season…so I could see my friends, sit on my sofa, fuck my girl without it being a strain on my degree.

When I was younger and I imagined my future, it involved working hard, getting an awesome job, lots of respect…Prime Minster or something like that, changing the world. These days I really wanted a good job, so I could give Emily the life she deserved. So we could have a 'melt into the sunset' life together. I sat here…nervously twiddling with my pens as a short sweaty man handed out our papers. Three hours, one essay, easy, as long as I can keep my mind on foreign economic policy and off Emily's boobs.

Time passed quicker than I would have liked, but I finished with five minutes to spare, just enough time for a skim through. I glanced around, everyone looked about the same, apart from David Furniss…this wanker who excelled in everything, he'd clearly been done a while, and was calmly re-reading his paper. The sweaty man called out; I was directed to put my pen down and close my paper. It's done; I along with everybody else breathed a collective sigh of relief. I started getting excited about going home, seeing Emz.

I crossed the threshold, leaving the exam room feeling elated. Yes I still had stupid amounts of coursework, but tonight I could spend a guilt free evening with Em. My happiness was cut short by Dan, my course leader… a bit of a pretentious prick, the opposite of Kieran but I liked him anyway.

"ahh, Naomi…I was hoping to catch you." He was stood waiting for me…what did he think I was gonna slip out of the window.

"Hey." I pulled my bag higher on my shoulder, nipping a sneaky glance at my watch, I had a train soon, and I wasn't going to miss it.

"How did the exam go?"

"Well, I think, I hope anyway."

"Good, European politics might be your thing you know." I simply shrugged, I like European politics, it was interesting, and as much as having a conversation with my favourite lecturer about how I just kicked ass in his exam was fun, I'd rather be underground speeding towards St. Pancreas.

"Anyway…I wanted to show you this…" he handed me several pieces of paper. I skimmed the title briefly… 'Internship, the Independent.'. What the fuck. My expression must have encouraged him to elaborate.

"It's a two month internship for The Independent, a friend of mine who working in their editing department gave me a call. Wanted to know if I could suggest some candidates… you of course were the first to spring to mind."

My heart soared, this was fucking amazing. Fuck exams, this was real experience. "It's paid of course." Of course, it gets better and fucking better.

"You'd be accompanying a political editor and their team to several different conferences and summits in Europe." End of whirlwind excitement.

Europe equals being apart from Emily. For two months. Travelling, without her. There is no way she'd agree. There's no way I could spend two months without her, not now. I'm guessing my attitude was clear to Dan.

"Think about it Naomi…this is a career making experience…not to be dismissed lightly." He shot me a supportive smile before walking off, leaving me holding an A4 fire in my hands. Shit. I stuffed it into my bag; I don't need the stress right now…I'll choose avoidance, at least for tonight.

The train was packed; I'd managed to get a seat, thank god. I felt the internship information burrowing through the canvas of my bag. Part of me wanted to pour though it. 15 year old idealistic Naomi would have taken it in a heart beat…packed up tomorrow and gone. But that was before I fell in love…before I became a 'we' person. We do things, we make decisions, we talk about big opportunities that affect our relationship. But it was a fucking farce…I knew full well I couldn't talk to Emily about this…she wouldn't hear me; she'd just assume I was leaving her.

I tried to force it all to the far reaches of my mind…tonight I just wanted to spend time with her, I didn't want to fight. My suppression techniques succeeded alleviating my stress, even if it was a band aid on a break, by the time the train pulled alongside Bristol platform I felt much calmer.

I jogged up the platform, shivering off the cold wind blowing through the sheltered building. Christmas had been cold, but the new year had started with a bitter tinge, every gust cutting your skin like ice. I saw her before the barrier had released my ticket. Her smile making my heart race, making my feet impatient, the platform gates were so fucking slow. However once released I was a women on a mission, I made a beeline for my softly smirking red head, who stood stationary, waiting patiently for me to reach her. I loved it when Emily picked me up; I loved it when I knew she was going to be there, I loved it when she surprised me. The thoughts of the internship opportunity were lost amongst kisses. Her lips washing away most thoughts entirely; leaving my head swirling with nothing but excitement.

"hey." Her dimples blushed, as we calmly walked out of the station hand in hand. I'd given up on being world class anyway, who needs stupid Emily-less internships.

"Hey, how was your day?" She asked, her eyes meeting mine briefly, before looking away, blushing furiously again, not a subtle creature Emily Fitch, I knew exactly what she'd been thinking about all day. As I pictured it, I felt my thigh's groan in agreement. Like a yoyo my mind kept returning back to the one piece of information I was trying to ignore.

"Not bad." I tried no keep my voice steady.

"Exam not go well?" unfortunately she could clearly read me like a book. I sighed; I'm not ready to talk about the offer, so I lied. I lied to the woman I love and it was easy. Not like before, with Eff and Katie, it rolled off my tongue and out into the open before I even considered the truth.

"It went ok I guess, I dunno, I don't know if it was enough."

"ohh, baby don't stress, you couldn't have been more prepared, I'm sure you did great." I didn't even feel guilty. We walked over to her moped; I donned my helmet and pushed up against her. I spent the entire trip letting my hands slip 'accidentally' only stopping when I realised if I carried on we could crash. The moment the engine disengaged she slipped away, off the leather padded seat, I missed the heat of her body, the cold air rushing against my flushed skin. I caught her wrist as she moved away, pulling her back to me in one fluid motion, her lips fell easily upon mine. I'd missed her recently; id missed the feeling of her skin scorching mine, her lips, the way she tasted. Kissing Emily was indescribable. She pushed herself into me, trying to gather a greater purchase on my hips; I felt the moped complain under the strain. I pushed her back, standing us up before I withdrew my tongue from the furious battle it was waging. The most adorable giggle floated from her and she gnawed on her rosy lip, she was astonishing, nothing could compare with Emily, not a two month internship with one of this country's only readable newspapers. No, I'm not thinking about that, I'm thinking about her, about us, about our future. Well if I truly think about it, sacrificing now would mean we could have a better future. No, stop thinking brain…Emily Now, not Emily later. No again, Emily now and later, Emily always. I felt like a caveman repeatedly beating my internal self over the head, saying 'Emily' over and over. I'd gotten caught in my internal monologue, she'd noticed and in perfect Emily fashion placed a lingering kiss on my forehead.

"babe, don't stress, you'll get a first and you know it." I smiled, it was honest, she made me fucking happy. We moved towards the house, her hand instinctively finding mine again, pulling me along. She pulled me through the front door, stopping suddenly; I felt the usual heat erupt within me as our bodies collided. I nuzzled her hair, breathing in as much of her as I could. She squirmed away, chuckling lightly.

"For fuck sake…" that wasn't Emz.

"Going somewhere?" I looked up to see Effy and Katie all dressed up, ready for a night out. We'd have the house to ourselves. Effy was wearing Katie's necklace, and a figure hugging Effy classic black dress and my bloody boots, again!

"Yeah, out, clubbing. It's Friday night, exams finished, time to get fucked up."

Emily gives me a look; I know exactly what she wants. Unfortunately it isn't me naked in an empty house.

"Give us half an hour and we'll join you." I sigh through my grin. What Emily wants Emily gets, what about what I want? Seriously stop moaning.

"You get twenty minutes bitch and then we're heading to Keith's." Katie smiled, dragging Effy back into the kitchen. Emily lunged at the stairs, dragging me with her.

To be honest I could be quite up for a good night out, but wouldn't mind getting ready at a normal pace, having some dinner and not rushing manically, I've been rushing all day.

Twenty five minutes. That's how long it took Emz and I to get ready, it's a fucking record. However it does mean I've spent the last five minutes been nagged at by Katie Fucking Fitch. It wasn't even seven o'clock yet, fucking mental alcoholic bitch. Emily chuckled whist applying her thick eyeliner, choosing to remain a silent witness to the argument erupting through our bedroom door.

"Alright, keep your knickers on." I huffed.

"What is taking you so fucking long…its not like you could look any worse."

"Fuck off Katie."

"Fucking hurry up, Eff and I want to leave."

Emily swung the door open revealing her red faced twin.

"Calm the fuck down Katie, we're ready." I stuck my tongue out at the brunette and followed her sister, who was gliding down the stairs, she looked so sexy. Black skirt which was criminally short and a grey vest. Simple but perfect.

Keith's was dead. Cook and Karen were already sat in a booth by the time we got there. I needed a drink, I was feeling knackered and if I didn't perk up I was going to be a complete funsponge tonight.

"Lezza's!" Jesus he was loud and obnoxious. Emily let my hand slip away, knowing he would pull me into a bear hug, she sauntered over to the bar with Katie avoiding my eye line.

"Hey Cook." I sighed; he stank of a variety of sins. I wriggled free of his strong arms and moved off after Emily, I had promised to be more considerate. I wrapped my arms around her, letting her sweet perfume smother the smell of Cook in my nose. Katie caught my eyes and gave me a half smile, I am fucking considerate, I wish people wouldn't act so surprised when I put Emily first. I saw Katie glance back at Effy, whom appeared to be stuck in an awkward silence back the table.

"I'm gonna go relieve Eff, get a round in lezza's." She pushed off the bar, leaving Em and I alone. The bloody women pulling our drinks was unbearably slow, I know there's hardly a rush on but Christ I need a drink.

Em and I waited in a comfortable silence, constantly touching. How could I even think of spending two months away from her? I couldn't spend two hours before I desperately had to reach out and hold her.

The rest of the night passed in a blur of laughter and vodka. It had been ages since we all comfortably hung out at Keith's. Of course Katie dragged us to a club, bitching about the fact Em and I had to stop for chips along the way. Emily Made up for it by running to the bar with her sister the moment we reached the club, they were getting the shots in. Cook and Karen disappeared off and Eff and I hung outside for a nicotine fix.

"You've been weird tonight." Maybe stopping out with Effy was a bad call.

"I'm fine."

"Sure, you tell yourself that, and see how well it goes." She took a long drag of her fag, fucking Effy.

"Its nothing." She left my silence, I had to say something. "I got an interesting offer today… for this newspaper internship for a couple months over the summer."

"Wow, impressed, that's great Naoms." Her own Effy brand of enthusiasm creeping in..

"Thanks, I'm not taking it though." I tried to hide my disappointment.

"Why?"

"Its in Europe, I'd have to leave Em for two months."

We returned to silence, nothing more could be said. Effy finished her fag and gave me a sad smile. We caught sight of our significant others, dancing in a wash of bodies the moment we entered the dingy space. Emily looked stunning, but I couldn't help the resentment that had settled in my stomach.


	21. Chapter 21

**Hello :) I'm not sure I'm completely happy with this chapter, I know ****its short but I'm trying to keep motivated so I wanted to post it :) hope its ok.**

**Anonymoushaley – I realized I rudely didn't answer your question… My next story is def going to be Naomily (is there any other kind? :P lol) I figure I want to take this one to 26-8 chapters, I duno yet, unfortunately there are some unhappy times to come and I don't wanna rush it.**

**Anyway, I hope its ok, as always mistakes are all mine. Reviews would be great, they make me really happy.**

Effy's POV

Its been two fucking weeks. Two weeks of Naomi being a twat. I love her, she's my best friend but I'm seriously pissed off. Two weeks ago outside the club she told me about her job offer. Two weeks and she hadn't told Emily. What was even worse was Katie's Paranoia that my behaviour was something to do with her. So Naomi's immense twatishness was directly affecting my relationship, when it should be affecting hers.

I knew it was bollocks, the idea that she wasn't even considering applying for this job. She'd begun making subtle inquiries. In the sake of 'getting her name out there'. Bullshit. Don't get me wrong, it's a great job, I think she should go for it, but she needs to talk to her girlfriends about it. Her broken, distrustful girlfriend, who is going to be hurt when this dirty little secret gets spilled. And it will, because I'm not risking what Katie and I have so Naomi can be a sneaky bitch. And Katie doesn't understand the term secret; especially not where her is sister is concerned.

We were having a lazy Sunday afternoon. Katie's head was resting on my stomach, she was doodling some new Jewelry designs. She was getting really good. The necklace she'd make me for my birthday was amazing, but some of her latest designs were breathtaking. Scrawled delicately over her pad was a design for two watches, identical but different. Kay was making them for her and Emily's 21st. Apparently Naomi and I were paying, of course Katie Fitch doesn't buy her own birthday presents.

I was trying to catch up on a few journals, but I was bored. Playing with Kay's hair was so much more interesting. That and I could hear Emily shuffling about next door which catapulted my mind back to the Naomi/job issue. Naomi had nipped out to the shops leaving Emily to practice some drama thing. I closed my laptop, It wasn't sinking in anyway. Katie looked up at me, her brown eyes absorbing mine. I loved the intimacy within our relationship, she knew exactly when to push me, and when to back off. The brazen creature that was Katie Fitch was also sensitive and intuitive. I wasn't concerned about Katie having secrets. I'd probably be impressed if she kept anything from me, My girlfriend liked to talk…allot.

She climbed up my body, discarding her pad. She spent a couple of seconds just looking at me. I couldn't read her expression, which wasn't a good sign. When he lips finally met mine they were slow and deliberate, like she was testing the waters, like she was afraid. Fucking Naomi, fucking me up, fucking Katie up. I ran my hand through her soft brown hair, deepening our kiss. I let myself get carried away, exploring every millimeter of her mouth with my tongue. When I slipped my hands down to her waist, clawing at her hips I felt her retract. She pulled herself up, straddling me but so far away.

"what the fuck is going on with you?" Katie Hummed, not particularly aggressively, but lying under neither her I could tell she wasn't going to let me get away with silence.

"Nothing, just got allot on my mind."

"Don't do that, you don't do that anymore, not with me."

"Kay, it's not like that, it's not an issue."

"it is a fucking issue, you've been on one for fucking ages. I thought you were doing better?"

"I am doing fucking better." I spat, it was harsh. I didn't mean to, but I was offended. I had changed, I didn't need Katie's constant supervision to be ok anymore, I barely thought of Freds. I want the credit for my sanity; I can't go back to concerned glances and transparent questions. Katie Recoiled slightly, and shifted, like she was about to slip away. I caught her by the wrists, pulling her back over my body. Naomi had her chance, she had two fucking weeks. The look on Katie's face could motivate me to walk through broken glass or sit through the Thunderbirds Movie.

"Sorry." I resolved, Katie shrugged and I sighed.

"Whatever…"

"It's not us. Naomi…she told me something." Katie's eyes hit me like fire, If I wasn't lying down I would have tumbled backwards. Katie flew off me, putting a good few feet between us.

"What?" Too loud. My eyes instinctively flicked at the door, this was probably terrible timing, with Emily only in the next room.

"what did she do? Who did she do?" Katie's voice barely a whisper, she wasn't angry anymore, she looked terrified.

"Nothing like that Katie…You know she'd never."

"Then what, because if that lezza bitch hurts her again, I swear I will actually kill her."

Emily POV.

"_what?" _ I heard Katie yell through the wall. I slipped out into the hall, ready to support my sister. Effy had been off for Weeks, Naomi had been really cagy as to why. It was going to kick off at some point. I tried to eavesdrop, rude I know, but she's my twin, she'd never been in love before, she didn't deserve her heart to be trampled on. It only took a couple minutes for me to regret leaving our room.

"She's got an internship offer…hasn't told Em yet…two months…Europe." They were talking so quietly, I felt my cheeks redden, getting hotter. They were talking about Naomi. I tore back in to our room; I spent a minute just stood still, my eyes flicking around in time with my brain leaping from one conclusion to another.

Naomi's laptop. I flicked it open and powered it up. I spent the next four minutes stewing, anxiously shivering on the edge of my bed. I logged into her email, it wasn't hard to guess the password. Lobstercheese. It was her password for everything. I didn't feel guilty as her hotmail inbox popped up, nor as I started scrolling through emails. Fucking secretive bitch. There was easily a dozen from 'the independent', a tosser called Bill Irons. She's been emailing them, several times a day for at least two weeks. How the fuck haven't I noticed this? No it's not me, I've been fucking here, with her, she's been fucking sneaking around Emailing people and hiding it from me. If it wasn't an issue, if it wasn't something big Effy wouldn't be whispering.

I timidly started reading. The first email, two fucking weeks ago.

**Naomi,**

**Thanks for getting back to us so quickly**. of course she fucking did. **When I spoke to Dan he assured me he had only one student whom he would recommend, he spoke incredibly highly of you, you should feel very proud of yourself.** She should, she's fucking brilliant, but I'm fucking angry, for someone so fucking clever she can be a real stupid bitch when she wants to be. **I've attached the internship details and itinerary, I would be more than happy to process your application, however your recommendation with Dan goes along way, the internship is yours. I hope to hear from you soon regarding your decision.**

**Yours sincerely Bill Irons, Independent political editor.**

I clicked on the attachment and started to read through it. My anger fading and re-emerging in intervals. By the time the document closed I felt thoroughly sick. The sun must have set at some point, I looked up from the screen and our room was dark, my eyes strained against the contrast. I lay the laptop to one side. I'd read and re-read the details. Naomi had been offered a two month internship with the independent newspaper. The job would entail her visiting various cities in Europe where specific conferences were being held and help the journalists write it up and do research. I let my head fall into my hands. I was an uncomfortable mix of proud and hurt.

Two weeks she'd known this, all this time I thought this was an Effy issue. Naomi had been completely collected and Effy had been off. Fucking Effy, the master of stoicism and emotional suppression. Maybe Naomi was a fucking Ice Queen. She could just hide this huge thing from me. Something the twelve emails proved was clearly important to her but apparently I'm not important enough to confide in, Effy is though. Fuck proud but hurt…I'm fucking furious.

I ripped open the bedroom door, I'm surprised the hinges didn't split with the force. I jumped straight into Katie's room. It didn't occur to me what they might be doing; Lucky for me though Katie was pacing and Effy was watching her. Both women's faces fell when they saw me. My rage filled the small room.

"YOU FUCKING KNEW ABOUT THIS AND YOU SAID NOTHING. YOU FUCKING BITCH." I screamed at Effy. Katie's eyes flicked between us both, clearly unsure who to side with. Of course things don't change that much…she sides with the sex.

"Em, you're not mad at Effy," I glowered at my twin, fucking Judas, what happened to blood being thicker than water, not that I ever expect her to take my side. She only started standing up to mum with me when she started fucking girls.

"Fuck off Katie." I lowered my voice, I didn't have the strength to yell anymore.

"Emily, Its not like that I swear, she was going to tell you." Effy sounded panicked.

"When? from the fucking airport?" I watched as Effy stumbled over words. I prepared another angry rant but was cut off by the front door. Naomi was home.


	22. Chapter 22

**Hey :) Thanks for the reviews guys, I really appreciate it. They've kept me off facebook and writing tonight :) I'm sorry about the cliffhangers :P**

**Hope you're all having an awesome week :) as always mistakes are mine. (There might be a few because even though I've read and re-read this I've may have been drinking :P sorry ) I'm realizing I've left the keffy stuff…I'm itching to get back to it, so I promise I will soon.**

**Reviews would be great. Thanks again. Enjoy.**

**Laura**

I shot down the darkened stairs, I don't really remember moving but I was in the kitchen before I realized I'd made the decision to move. I was aware of both Katie and Effy yelling after me asking me to 'take a minute' and 'just fucking calm down'. Naomi had heard us coming of course, "Em?" She was putting shopping away; she closed the fridge door and looked at me. It nearly broke me, her face full of concern. How dare she be fucking concerned, I wanted to comfort her and rip her head off simultaneously. I opened my mouth to speak but couldn't find the words, I choked on my empty sentence.

Naomi was looking past me, at the other half of our unusual family. Effy's face must have given me up. Fuck Effy and Naomi, fuck their private mental connection crap.

"Em, I'm sorry…" Naomi began, but I turned away grabbing the kitchen door.

"FUCK OFF." I was screaming, I slammed the door isolating Naomi and I in our own angry island.

"Emily, please, I'm not taking it." She was pleading, she sounded fucking desperate, she's a fucking coward. I scoffed, is she just that naive…does she think I fucking am?

"Naomi don't kid yourself, if you weren't thinking about taking it you would have binned the offer when you got it. Although surprisingly enough that's not why I'm pissed."

"It's not?"

"no...I love you, this is a great opportunity. Instead of letting me make my own mind up and trusting me you lied like the secretive little bitch you are." I saw her recoil and spit right back. I knew exactly what to say to piss her off. I wanted her angry; I wanted her to fight back. I wanted to scream at her and I couldn't do that if she was being pathetic.

"You wanna talk about trust Emily…seriously?"

"Yeah, you completely disregard my feelings, you bulldoze right through them, no wonder I don't trust you."

"I 'bulldoze' do I? Fuck you, I work my ass off to keep you happy, it's not my fault you're an insecure cow."

"Actually it is."

"Nice Em, I wondered how long it would take."

"Fuck off…after today you have no right to judge me."

"Fine you wanna talk about trust, how about I trust you to respect my personal space. I mean how the fuck did you even find out?"

"That's not even an issue."

"Yes it fucking is, because apparently if I'd told you, you wouldn't be having a complete meltdown about it." Her voice was dripping with attitude, almost a direct flashback to the woman I fell in love with. Which you think would be a good thing. That I'd swoon and forgive her. Right now Naomi reminded me of the cow that fucked me and left me by the lake.

"I overheard Katie and Effy and looked on your computer and learned the rest myself…don't worry your precious Effy didn't break your confidence. You can still trust her. But apparently you never trusted me."

"You went through my emails…fuck sake Emily do you realise how neurotic that is."

"I needed answers."

"You could have asked."

"No I couldn't have…I've been asking…for weeks and you fucking lied. You lied over and over to me."

I watched her search for words, she knew I was right. All traces of anger left her, her deep blue eyes dug into me, trying to weigh up her guilt for me.

I'm not going to cry.

"You know what Naomi, what kills me is the fact that you chose to share this with Effy. I'm your girlfriend. This is a huge deal for you and you kept it from me. You're always hiding from me. You have Cook and Effy for all the parts of yourself you don't want to give me." My voice had sunken to barely a whisper as I felt the first of my unshed tears fall.

"That's not true."

"It is and you know it. You put things in boxes, you control everything."

"I don't want to hurt you."

"Naomi that hurts me. You know me, all I want is you. All of you not just the bits you think I can handle."

I felt my lip quiver… I couldn't stop the tears but I'm not going to breakdown. She already thinks I'm some sort of emotional basket case. Shit, I never used to feel conscious in front of her, this is fucked up.

"Em…" She started moving towards me, she was crying too. I can't handle this right now. I turned and bolted out of the kitchen, straining another pair of hinges and barrelling straight into my sister whose face had been pushed up against the wood.

As I smashed through the hall I briefly caught Effy's deep brown eyes, which darted away as if I'd burned them. She'd heard everything I'd said. I felt guilty. Naomi was crying, Effy was guilt-ridden and Katie looked in a state of general panic. Fuck's sake. I threw myself out of the front door, I wanted to be with myself and my thoughts, I didn't want to get dragged in to an overly incestuous argument where I'd come off like a petulant child. I got enough of that from my biological family, Katie non standing,

I'd left the house running that had migrated into a jog, which had transformed into a gentle walk until I found myself trundling. I found my way quickly to the seedier side of Bristol. I knocked three times on the solid wooden door. The black paint was cracked and peeling. I'm so fucking glad I don't live here. Even My parents in their worst financial stupor hadn't looked for flats in this postcode. Amy answered the door within seconds, laughing and swinging a half empty bottle of vodka. She was wearing a short skirt which showed off her legs.

"Emily…" She grinned swallowing her laughter. I pushed my way into the terraced house, straight into her living room. She shared with some girls from uni. I didn't know them well; I didn't want to, they were all fake bitches. So was Amy around them I guess. They were all dressed up, clearly half way gone already. Fuck sakes.

"Em…what's going on?"

"You going out?" I questioned sweeping my gaze over the hazy drug fuelled atmosphere.

"Erm…yeah, well…I was…I guess I am. I dunno." I snatched the bottle out of her hand, and necked a good amount, it burnt and I spluttered, trying to force as much of it down in one as possible. I guess getting fucked up really was my best escape, it always has been.

"Mind if I join?" I asked bluntly to the room. Amy's housemates all shared a look; probably thought I was some kind of psycho, fuck them. The one perched on the edge of the battered green sofa, Hailey, or something, fucking blond hair and blue eyes. I avoided her, didn't let my eyes move anywhere near her.

"Erm, no, the more the merrier." Amy was fucking beaming. I liked Amy, I couldn't tell you why, we just started talking on our first day. We had nothing in common, Naomi would have been sarcastic about it, would have taken the piss out of all the things I liked and she hated. Amy didn't she was fascinated by the way I saw the world and the things I loved. I of course spent too much time talking about Naomi. She didn't mind though, it was nice. It was nice for once that I had a friend who didn't really matter. I got on with her but if she fucked off tomorrow it wouldn't be the end of the world.

I borrowed some clothes and headed into town with them. Amy and I finished the vodka before we left and I was starting to feel fuzzy. Tonight I wasn't a happy, loveable drunk. I felt more like old Cook, balancing on the edge of fury, looking for a reason to unravel.

Six shot, three pints, and a couple of pills later I am more than trashed, dancing with random people. Amy might have been there, I couldn't tell you, my eyes were fixed on the floor, trying to keep myself from falling over. I think it might be home time. I need to throw up. I moved towards the bathrooms, bouncing on every solid surface and passing body as I flailed around. Although I was really struggling, It was nice that my brain had be reduced to concentrating on basic motor functions, it left no room to even think about Naomi. Well other than the fact she was pretty and I wished she was here.

I didn't make it to the bathroom. I felt guilty for a second…then moved on…I'm sure it wasn't the first time someone has thrown up in this corridor. In fact I think I acutely remember Cook bent over retching during his 'jail break party'.

I staggered to the bar; the tall twat reeled off a speech claiming he was refusing to serve me. Prick. He gave me a patronising look, one which would have suited my mother. I asked him for a water, and grabbed it without paying. Fucking Prick.

Outside the club the air was too cold. I was wasted, but my alcohol shield wasn't strong enough tonight, I slid down the brick wall, scrapping my back. I started to cry before I remembered why I was sad. Then Amy was there. Stroking my cheek, pushing back stray hairs from my clammy face. That wasn't her fucking job. Although now I was seated I was struggling to remember how to use my limbs. Words began to fall out of the girl's mouth, I wasn't listening. I swigged more and more of the cold bottled water. Loving how I could feel the cool liquid running through my body, refreshing my system.

"…Emily your better than this….you deserve better than this." And then she kissed me. I was so shocked. I didn't kiss her back, I didn't pull away either. She ran her tongue against my bottom lip, I'm not an expert in gay…by no means, but I'm guessing by the way her body was moving she was well up for what ever she though was transpiring here. I pulled back, realising I'd couldn't get further away because of the grimy wall. I used what energy the water had given me to push her off.

"Fuck." I sighed. I left her there on the floor, She was yelling at me. To be honest she could have been screaming the Latvian national anthem for all I cared. I sat in the back of the cab and turned my mobile on. I'd switched it off the first time Naomi had called me. A couple of minutes later my phone registered 48 missed calls and 30 messages. I fucking Hate Ipods, Katie brought me an Iphone, I was learning that touch screens are a bastard when you're drunk. The screen flashed and the vibrations started. 'Naoms' Our favourite new years picture flashed up under her name.

I slapped the 'keypad' a couple of times with my thumb until I connected.

"Emily!" I pulled the phone back; she was too loud for my head right now.

"Lo." I whispered.

"Em. Where the fuck are you?"

"Cab." I sighed.

"You drunk?" She was quieter now, which was good because my hand needed my face's support if this phone call was going to continue.

"yeah, sorry."

"its ok, are you okay? Are you coming home?" God she sounded sad. I could hear her sniffing, she'd been crying. She'd been getting upset whilst I'd been out kissing other girls. Fuck, I kissed someone else.

"yeah, I'll be home soon." I chocked out.

"Baby, I love you. I love you so much. I'm so sorry."

"Nai… I.. I Love you to." Great, just what we need right now. Stupid fucking Amy. Stupid fucking me, I know better. I hung up on Naomi and tried to compose myself.

I slumped back into the uncomfortable plastic seat. My seatbelt draped across me for show. I sighed, feeling deflated and upset. Which I guess was better than enraged. I learnt back and allowed the streetlamps flashing by to mesmerise me. The driver shouted something back at me. I sat up, collected myself, realising we were climbing our hill. I directed him to stop outside the familiar blue door. Naomi was waiting on the step, her phone clasped between her hands. She shot up as the taxi stopped. It wasn't long before her arms were around me, steadying my feet and the warmth of our home replaced cold layer freezing my skin. Although none of these things comforted me. Only a few hours ago I'd stormed out of here, gotten pissed off, gotten pissed, kissed someone else and come crawling home.

I felt dirty and if I had one wish (other than to go back ten hours and have a conversation with my girlfriend) it would be to be sober right now. Naomi sat me on the stairs whilst she locked the door. My brain could only process one thought at a time. Right now Its how beautiful Nai looks in the half light. She returned to me, removing my boots. I like those boots; they were the only item of clothing besides my underwear that was mine. I felt naked without them. I pulled her head up to me, I crashed our lips together. It didn't take long for her to stiffen up and pull away, it didn't feel good, she wasn't smiling.

"She ok?" I heard a voice in the distance, it was Katie.

"She's fucked." Naomi's tone was so empty, it made me panic.

"Fucking hell." I could feel Katie descend the stairs, each foot fall vibrating through the wood and into my back.

"hey Emsie."

"Hi." I whispered, hoping my voice wouldn't betray my brain. Both Katie and Naomi dragged me to my feet and up the stairs. Dropping me gently onto our bed. It was soft and smelt amazing, If I wasn't painfully aware of the conversation I needed to have I could have happily curled into a ball and fallen asleep. Once Katie had left Naomi returned to me, helping me out of my clothes. My heavy arms and legs being a burden. It was now of never I guess.

"I kissed someone."

"I know."


	23. Chapter 23

**Hello :) Thanks for the reviews, alerts and favorites folks, makes me very smiley. Hope this chapter is ok. I'm learning allot about my writing as I go. Let me no what you think, you're reviews are always appreciated and really motivate me to write. Any way, as always mistakes are mine….I hope you enjoy it.**

**Laura x**

I hated this room. It was too small for two people. I folded up the tops I'd laid across the unmade bed, placing the parcels neatly into my bag. I bundled my pig shirt into the bag hastily, trying to suppress the flourish of images that jumped into to my mind.

It was more of a discussion than an argument. I had known by the way she tasted. She tasted nothing like my Emily. I knew I had to leave.

"_she kissed me."_

"_I know. You knew she would, you knew how she felt. I'm not angry Emily but please don't pretend you're the victim in all of this." I calmly explained to her. I sat on the edge of our bed facing away from her. Emily was buried in our duvet, her hangover still apparent. "It's our pattern, I hurt you and you kiss someone else." I heard her sigh. "I'm kinda sick of it to be honest."_

"_I'm sorry. It didn't mean anything." She was crying, for once I didn't feel guilty; it wasn't me forcing tears from her eyes._

"_It meant something to her."_

"_That doesn't matter."_

"_Yes it does." I turned around so I could face her. "I want you, but you don't see it, you just see everything I do to hurt you. I'm fed up of hurting you. I'm done."_

"_What the fuck does that mean?" the pitch of her voice cut through the quiet atmosphere._

"_It doesn't mean anything Em. Look I just need some time ok. We need to figure out what we want, we keep circling back, you don't rust me and its been a long time since you have. I screwed up, I made a mistake. Instead of talking to me you got trashed and kissed someone else."_

"_she kissed me!"_

"_grow up Emily. We can't carry on like this, if you love me you'll grow the fuck up" I took in her pissed off expression. I could see her fighting the anger she wanted to chuck at me. I didn't want to fight; I didn't have the energy for it. _

_The worst part had been being relived; when she picked up her phone in the taxi I had felt relief. I'd spent the better part of the night panicking. Riling myself into a state, convincing myself she wasn't ever coming home. After the initial fear I felt guilt, chastising myself for when I had 'walked out' on Em months before, what I must have put her through. My relief had been short lived, her tongue tasted like schnapps. I knew then. Emily hates Archers because Katie used to make her drink it when they were thirteen. Apparently Jenna thought they were addicted to some sort of peachy sweet._

"_I'm sorry, look I'm not angry."_

"_Fuck you're not." She spat at me. I don't blame her for being angry at me. I lied. I knew she'd be hurt, just like she knew when she went to Amy's last night she wasn't going for a heart to heart._

"_I don't want to fight with you anymore."_

"_That's rich, you have your clothes assembled, you almost ready to fuck off?"_

"_I'm not fucking off, I just need some space, okay. So that we can work this out. We can't do that right now, not without this becoming an argument. So I'm going to leave and let us both get a bit of perspective." _

"_You're so mature Naomi." She hissed at me, turning out of the bed and out of our room_. That's the last time I saw her. "Fine bail."

"_I love you. Don't forget it. I just don't like you right now."_

I started filling my bag. I felt empty, so full of nothing. I don't know If I'm even happy with my decision. Katie had tried to get through to me.

"_Hey." My head whipped up to see the approaching brunette. I was sat on the curb in front of the house, smoking. Trying to cheer myself the fuck up. I nodded at Katie, who gently sat down besides me, grimacing at the thought of the dirty pavement coming into contact with her skirt._

"_Surprised to see me?" She asked a smile playing on the corners of her mouth._

"_Not really, I expected you to sooner really. Just don't bruise my face, I've got an interview next week." I sighed, turning towards Katie, expecting a fist that never came._

"_Don't be a stupid bitch; I'm not going to hit you." Oh, great I guess. "I want to hit her though, silly cow." She bumped her shoulder into mine, fuck me Katie Fitch is being nice to me after I just left her sister heartbroken._

"_You ok?" I must have looked visibly shocked. "Fuck off, I can be nice bitch."_

"_erm…sorry Katie. To be honest, I'm not bad." I wasn't lying, I was depressed, but I felt better than I had in a while._

"_Good. Effy needs you."_

"_I need this."_

"_I know. And I can't blame you; my baby sister is being a complete mental cunt. But don't punish Eff, or Cook, or Gina or fucking me for that matter." I raised my eyebrows. "What, we've been living together for almost a year; I'm allowed to care lezza."_

_I looked her in the eye, smiled, stuck my tongue out and waggled my eyebrows, channelling as much of my inner Cook as possible. We both Laughed, if felt good to laugh, the last few weeks have been so loaded with stress and anticipation it was nice to just have a laugh. And a really twisted part of me saw Emily in Katie, wished I could hear her laughing again._

"_God, keep it in your pants Campbell, I know I'm hot but I'm spoken for."_

"_Ahh, yeah, I forgot you're into brunettes."_

_Something about what I said made my heart hurt. I was into redheads, a redhead._

"_Just think about it yeah? London is too far." She stood up, patted herself down and started to walk back down the street the way she came._

"_Where are you going?" I couldn't help but laugh when she rolled her eyes at me._

"_Shopping, duh. Wanna come? You know you want me to do something about those dyke jeans." _

"_Nah, me and my 'dyke' jeans are very happy together." If it's possible to scowl and smile at the same time, that pretty accurately describes my expression._

I considered Katie Fitch toxic and my nemesis for most of my teenage years, Now she's part of who I am. Just like Effy is. Just like Cook is. Just like Emily Is.

I slung my green duffle bag over my shoulder, slipping quietly down the stairs. I pushed the keys through the letterbox and began trudging through the city towards the train station. As usual the train was packed. I don't know how but I got a seat. I guess I've got the look of a woman who shouldn't be fucked with. Good, That's the Naomi I need to get back to. Not Emily's lap dog.

I curled my legs up to my chin and watched the city fad away.

I felt and uncomfortable nausea roll over me as the train stopped in Swindon. I was fucking homeless.

It took her longer to answer the door than I would have liked. She was rubbing bubbles off her hands with a tea towel.

"Naomi..." She looked shocked. I should have called. Her smile broke through her concern and she dragged me in to a hug. She smelt like home.

"Hey mum." I smiled into her shoulder, and hugged her back, just a little.

"Tea for my long lost daughter." Gina erupted, moving swiftly into the kitchen, leaving me to cross the threshold alone. I've never lived her. This place has never been my home. It's the house my mum shares with Kieran. Even though I'm technically on unfamiliar soil I don't feel homeless anymore. My mother has definitely moulded this house into her image. It was nice, comforting, just like my mother's embrace. I dumped my bag in the hall, I was conscious this wasn't my house, I couldn't just dump things. Mum stuck her head out of the kitchen door.

"Naomi, don't worry about the bag love, we'll take care of it later. Come have tea." Fucking hell I never used to be so transparent.

I joined mum in the kitchen who was busy filling the kettle.

"So, where the fuck have you been for the last three weeks?" There was no trace of anger in her voice, only curiosity.

"Staying with some friends in London."

"And your home now?"

I looked at my mother, rolling my eyes.

"I'm happy your home dear, I really am."

"Fine, I just wanted to come home ok?"

"That's great love." The kettle began releasing stream as Gina arranged bags into mugs. I sat myself at the table. Soothed by the smooth warn wooden seat, everything in Hailey's flat was plastic or stainless steal. Mum joined me, sitting opposite and presenting me with a steaming mug of some flavoured tea. I sighed into the steam.

"I wasn't sure you we're coming back." The older woman looked me square in the eyes. There was a desperate edge to them I didn't like.

"I just needed a break."

"I know love, but you just left, you didn't say where you were going."

"I'm not dad."

"I never said you were love, we we're worried."

"we?

"Keiran and I. And…"

"And Emily." I finished for her, sighing loudly again.

"Yeah, sorry love."

"what the fuck are you sorry about?"

"I didn't know If you…I mean…that you. Look Naomi I love you, and I love her, she's hurting."

"when isn't she." I rubbed my eyes.

"Naomi…" her tone was full of caution. I know my mum loves Emily. I do too, but I didn't come home to feel guiltier.

"Can I stay here for a bit?" I shot at my mum, trying to suppress all other thoughts and feelings.

"Of course."

"Great. I'm going out." I pushed my mug away as I pushed away mum's compassion.

"Naomi… I know this is hard on you, but don't throw away what you two have."

"I'm not mum. I couldn't if I wanted to." I slipped out into the hall, grabbing my phone and my wallet as I jogged out into the Bristol air.

I flicked my phone on. She'd stopped calling after the first week. She still sent a text every night before bed. A simple I love you. I think though three digital words had strengthened my resolve. They made it easier to stay away. I never replied.

I called Cook.

"Naomikins my lezza buddy, how ya diddlin?"

"Hey Cook. Fancy a drink?"

"Deffo, but I ain't drinking outside my postcode so you best drag your ass home."

"Fine…Keith's in twenty minutes." I laughed into the phone. As he spluttered on whatever he was smoking.

I hung up the phone and wandered to Keith's pub. The brown pealing wallpaper was oddly another comfort, chipping away at my feeling of disorientation. Granted this pub was full of Emily orientated memories but they were mostly happy ones so I let my mind explore them whilst I waited for Cook's grand entrance.

A few hours later I was happily drunk and giggling with Cook. He was going through what I'd missed in the three weeks I'd been living in London. His stories avoided two Key themes…Couples and Emily. He danced around them, it was quite impressive considering he was half cut.

"So when are you coming home?"

"I'm not." I replied quietly.

"wha? Why?"

"Cuz its not right for us."

"Fuck that, you and Emz are proper."

"Cook, Just gimmie a break k, I'm doing this for me and Emily." I slurred and sighed into my nearly empty glass.

"Nother vodka coke?"

Once out drinks we're refreshed, and I used the term in its loosest manner because the 'freshness' of these glasses was definitely questionable, the serious conversation started.

"she's cut up."

"I know."

"You don't care?" Just like my mother his tone wasn't accusatory, just curious.

"Of course I care. But we can't carry on like we were, someone need to break the cycle." He nodded along with me.

"You gonna tell her you're back in Bristol?"

"Probably."

"when?"

"it's none of your fucking business Cook, so fuck off will you."

"Fine Naomikins, keep your wig on."

We drank for the rest of the day away, ignoring the fact Cook should have been at work and the fact we we're both completely pissed by one pm. We stumbled to Gina and Kieran's a little after half seven. We ordered pizza and watched cheesy telly. I was asleep by nine. Some time later I awoke to the vibrations of my phone, I untangled myself from Cook's arms. I felt my heart quicken as Emily's name flashed on the screen, It was the final piece of home.

**I'm so in love with you. X**

I spent a couple minute writing and re-writing a reply. Before I sent it I realised that the first contact I had with the woman I love after three weeks of silence shouldn't be a text message. I hit Call. It rang four times; I can imagine her nervously answering.

"Hey." God she sounded good. A smile broke through and a winced as the happiness reached my now very hung-over head.

"Hey."

Silence. An awkward silence. But I called her so I guess it my silence to fill.

"Tell me about your week." I asked her, smiling quietly into the handset,

"Naomi..I…"

"Em, Tell me about your week." I cut her off. It might be callous, but I wanted to talk to her, not have some big significant conversation about the future of our relationship.

We spent a few hours taking. It was great, easy.

Cook's snoring got progressively louder but I didn't want to leave the living room and wake the occupants of this two bed.

"sounds like Cook" Emily giggled.

"Yup. Silly tosser is only getting louder, he fucking stinks aswell."

There was a long pause in which I realised what I'd said.

"You're in Bristol?"

"Yeah, I'm at Mum's." I heard a little oh. "I got here today. I was staying with Hailey." She does deserve a fucking explanation.

"So London?"

"Yeah."

"You going back?"

"No." There was a long pause.

"I'm kinda tired." I was disappointed, I didn't want her to go, and despite my best efforts I'd missed her terribly. This morning I wasn't even sure if coming home was a good idea, but now I felt more confused than ever.


End file.
